Everybody has an ego Button
But not everybody is dumb to place it where always gets pressed
The joke is that my legs haven’t even run one percent of one % what my mind has
You really learn how much cold you can comfortably take when you’re hanging out in a parking lot for two hours every night
Serotonin is the spiritual chemical while dopamine is the physical
Dead ass
if women have a physical menstrual cycle then men must have some kind of bullshit mental cycle too
My theory is that if you keep people fat sick and scared long enough,
it essentially fucks up their spiritual development and downloads
And meanwhile, compounds trauma and negative behaviors and destructive tendencies
But if you have the right perspective,
and if you end up in the right place at the right time enough times
then you can alchemize the shit and take a shortcut to Nirvana
because it essentially turns into consciousness training to give you the opportunity to leapfrog spiritually
thanks to your vices
Most people have never been body slammed on a cold martial arts mat in the middle of a strip mall in the middle of winter in the middle of the greatest spiritual health scare of all time
And it shows
*deep in thought
**staring out the rainy window 🪟
“I’m fucking brilliant
I’ll just run up and down the street nine times and call it a work-out challenge “💭
Friendly reminder The mat gets cold af during the winter
Hate that we’ve somehow normalized pharmaceuticals but demonized herbal supplements…
Bodybuilding will teach you how to get so fucked up stone cold sober- you won’t even think about party drugs
Remembering they used to sell legit steroids and all kinds of sketchy sups at GNC
Now you have to go to strange hole in the wall places
or you gotta go to the right website
and send the right cryptocurrency to the right wallet
and send the right prayer to the right Demi God that some shit shows up in the mail
but strangely usually does
Anyone who’s ever got sober and then gotten into bodybuilding will quickly realize many of the carryovers from one lifestyle to the next
* Like when you’re carrying around many strange bags of powders
* Constantly busting out the scale
* Getting super moody over strange substances
* And spending most of your time around sketchy sweaty dudes
Short but funny
Random and mixed
Level three trigger warning
(Expected to grow)
LAST EDITED: 12-29-25
REAL SHIT
The gym can be an exciting place for everybody
except if you have no idea what to do or if you’re getting tired of doing the same old shit
So check out a couple of these simple movement challenges to get a taste of what you may be good at or maybe missing out on
Activist
Complete one workout from the fire element
So if you go to the training deck
Focus on fire or the tetrahedron
Or red
And then just go in order beginning at Ace
(sorry if the deck is a little jumbled when you go, it’s likely being edited)
But it’s painfully simple to follow so just open it and scroll
And click the exercise title if you need a demo
It’ll take it to YouTube
Moving on…
Complete at least three workouts a week for three months
Of at least 30 minutes each
Even if you just end up sitting on your hands or stretching or walking on the treadmill as long as you’re doing it in the gym
Don’t have to do any of my workouts
Although they’re there to be easy to follow
Hell, you can even show up for the planet fitness pizza night
Or massage chairs
as long as you show up
Complete at least a five minute dynamic mobility warm-up before whatever madness you get into
Again, this is the water element on the training deck
So just follow along
But mobility workouts are usually 12 movements at least
Complete at least 3 intentional miles per week outside of what you normally walk each day
Bonus points if in the woods
Limit foods to anything that will go bad if not put in the refrigerator in a hour or two
Or if something else wouldn’t eat it quickly, then you shouldn’t either
Try to devote at least 60 minutes a week to some kind of movement study or research
Or scrolling this website
Kidding, not kidding
Try to stay off social media best you can
And the scale
Keep this up and you’ll make scary progress within your first 18 months and you’ll be an amateur before you know it
Amateur
Ain’t holding back on y’all I’m challenging you to do the whole damn training deck lol
Try to complete at least four workouts per week for three months
However, to be in this category, that should be super easy already
But you’ll see why I’m saying this in just a second
Because for the first few sessions,
the challenge is to go back to square one and progress your way back up from the lowest available weight increment
With the strictest form and technique possible
Including rest and rep ranges
Then, after a few sessions begin pushing until soft or technical failure
This is where you might have a couple reps left in the tank,
but your form was beginning to become compromised
And then for the final few weeks, the goal is to push to absolute failure or slightly beyond where you had previously failed
The amount of resistance is not important for these challenges
But our intention is
You are also challenged to alternate training types if possible
For example
If you do strength on day one then do mobility on day two
and then maybe endurance on day three
If you have been doing full body routines, then you are challenged to begin to split them up
The push pull leg split is the most popular for a good reason
But you can also try an upper lower cardio
Or the very least have a light medium, heavy, full body split
You are also challenged not to speak about your workout unless somebody correctly asks
No offense, but most amateurs can’t shut up
But If you’re already good at showing up,
then I like you already
That’s one of them kidding not kidding lines
athletes
You are challenged to chill out a bit first and foremost
Sorry that’s another one of those kidding, not kidding lines
But joking aside,
you are also challenged to go back to square one,
back to the basics and to revisit failure just like an amateur
But you should be better at at this time because you’ve already done it
And you’ll actually expose more Blindspots than you did the first time around
Because now you have a better sense of what you’re doing
But if you’ve been competing for a while, then it has likely become unconscious to push hard harder than necessary
The good news is is that you probably have built up a fast recovery metabolism so you’ll actually see renewed results once the intensity is dialed back
Giving your body an edge to recover more and rebuild
But another major challenge is going to be to focus on a three month phase of some training methodology that you do not have much experience in
So if you’ve been doing some powerlifting, then I’m gonna recommend checking out mobility
If you’ve been a cardio bunny or a marathon runner
then maybe it’s time to check out bodybuilding or hypertrophy
And if you’ve been doing a lot of functional stuff for fighting like a Power Ranger,
then maybe check out strength training to become truly dangerous
Likely the hardest challenge for athletes is to also limit discussing their programs, unless asked by other athletes
So no more proactive postings about your numbers cause honestly not many people care
Except for those who might be secretly competing with you
Because you’re secretly competing with them and you think they don’t know
So it cancels out
Seriously, though all that really matters is your ability to recover faster than you break down
And at this point,
you should be getting pretty good at that and that counts for a hell of a lot
So it would be a shame to end up throwing away all your hard work on some stupid injury like most do
You don’t want to be like that one dude
“everything was going great until I took an arrow to the knee”
Or whatever he said
And lastly, you are challenged to troll an amateur
Sorry,
I meant help one if needed..
Artist
I’m surprised you are still here and have not short-circuited by now
Man, I guess I’ve got a lot of those kidding, not kidding lines in me
AnyWho, it’s kind of difficult to define accurate challenges for “artists”
Due to the super niche shit you’ve likely been obsessing over for the past three years
So the real challenge is to become a specialist at some other training methodology
Preferably your weakest
Or the opposite or whatever you’ve been doing
That means if you’ve been a big power builder,
It’s time to go do some jujutsu bro
And vice versa for sure
The good news is because of your detailed understanding of your current craft,
You’ll pick up the new one fairly well in time
If you can survive the first two years of hell that comes with relearning anything
Also, you’ll likely have to go take advice from activist and amateurs again
And that is a very difficult type of Humble Pie to eat
But if you play your cards right,
you can likely become a legitimate artist in another training methodology within three years
Putting you in a perfect position to apply for your adeptship
I think it’s important to emphasize some generic challenges however even for the more advanced
Mobility being the most important
It is a damn shame to be lifting for a decade and not be able to touch your toes
Or if you’re still making weird sounds when you stand up…
Or if you’re afraid of a flight of stairs…
That is typically the biggest imbalance when it comes down to this level of experience is that you’ll have these mass monsters who are on a borderline synthetic chemical diet
Who have been living in the locker room and sleeping on the pin loaded machines
So the goal is to become as balanced as possible while also mastering whatever it is you set your mind to
Cause you can’t help it right?
Cause that’s just how you’re built, right?
Cause no one understands you, right?
Especially not annoying athletes, right?
Yeah, yeah…
AnyWho
Last good challenge would probably be to go help the profane
And stop letting all the attention from activists go to your head
Or trolling an amateur
That never gets old lol
Adepts
Well, hello there old wise one
Or new curious newcomer
Doesn’t matter
Cause you should be the same at heart
Anyhow,
pretty much any challenge under this realm is going to be related to helping others- to actually matter
The primary challenge is to coach or mentor somebody else to at least athlete level
But the truth of the matter is
most likely at this point in the game, the challenges are around some kind of weird injury or lifestyle modification
Or sport obsession
Because if you’ve had any major injuries by this point,
you’ve either learned how to rehab them with the equivalent of magic,
Or you have simply learned how to train around them because you’ll be damned if you quit
Either way, just the sheer longevity of your training career carries significant value
But doesn’t necessarily mean you know that much
No offense
I know I’m weaving over here,
but I think you get it
And if you don’t,
then maybe you’re in the wrong group
Because there are many people who have been training for the time requirement,
But either do not meet the methodology
or performance requirements
The strength requirements are actually relatively low and reasonable,
considering the average personal best that many hit at the peak of their athletic phase
Now my personal challenge to the world,
As well as my life’s mission,
Is to have you setting all time personal performance bests
during this phase of your career,
with continuously decreasing energy investment
Meaning, continue to get stronger and make it easier to lift even as you get older
Because in the game of energy investing known as exercise,
we should be masters of recovery
There are simply too many different tricks tips and techniques that one can employ to defeat any character defect
or any amount of Thanksgiving leftovers
Other lifestyle challenges for this group are the equivalent of alchemy
Being the goal to turn poison into physical profit
But to go thru the ins and outs of all of that would be to expose secrets that we as leaders cannot allow to fall into the hands of the profane
So in closing here,
you were challenged to not only ensure you qualify for the strength requirements outlined
But to Chase a new personal best
And if you don’t think that is possible,
then I really suggest that you schedule a coaching too
cause I see coaches sell themselves short more than I see the profane
And if nothing else I can help you become a master of the small simple injury prevention movements that basically turn you into a physical therapist
And then you can do with that info what you will to help & heal
Long but good
Starts specific then Weaves to be more direct
Deff should read
CHALLENGES
LAST EDITED: 12-29-25
Sometimes the hardest thing can be finding cool places to explore when trapped in suburbia
What is one to do when they have the bug for the woods but no woods to get the bugs?
Well, that’s kind of what this column is about and also kind of just a way to share some low hanging tricks and tips that most may know, but some may not
The thing is with everything being converted into some form of a vinyl village,
It can be hard to find cool outdoor training spots that haven’t been completely watered down.
One advantage of all the new neighborhoods popping up all over the world is that many of them are now coming with outdoor exercise areas
So if you’re out and about on the town
and you need to get in a quick street workout,
then you can probably find some outdoor stuff in the nearest & largest neighborhood
Or public park obviously
Parks coming a couple different tiers as well
Some may be pretty poor and mostly just sidewalks with some shrubs
But others might have some nice winding trails hidden about them
One thing to look for is any park that offers biking trails
Biking trails double as fun running trails,
& are much more windy and have some cool jumps and shit built into them
Bikers are kind of assholes,
but at least they’re fewer and far between on the real trails lol
And you’re likely to avoid most of the amateurs because they’re still on the concrete paths
But sometimes it just takes an extra level of investigation to find a substantial park
But any kind of nature preserve or state park is going to be your best.
Best if you want something a little bit more authentic and scenic.
I can almost guarantee that there’s one within an hour from you somewhere, dear reader
Two at the most
Because if you’re already out there in the boonies,
then you could just go down the street
AnyWho
State parks are almost always free
Or cheap parking at most
And then,
little nature preserves are these hidden little pockets of get this
Preserved nature
That are a trail runner’s dream
Beyond that there are new classification of gyms showing up that are honestly not the worst
They are the big box gyms that are now half functional fitness factories
And while the ego and materialism are running rampant in them as with most gyms,
At least they have more functional equipment and a sled
So if you have to train indoors, it’ll carryover very well to an outdoor lifestyle
Last option might be to kinda do your own thing and build your own functional factory
If you have an eight by 8 ft.² spot in your home then you are good to go
And you can run down the street to your local sports store and grab some free weights
And grab one of my guides
and you’re off to the races
Between barbells and resistance bands (and obviously body weight)
you’ll be able to train whatever it is you want and to train for whatever it is you want to train for
So last final tips just in case you’ve never even considered It are the cheap at home equipment that you can take with you on the go.
For example, if you buy a pair of suspension straps
and keep them in that little to go bag to come with,
Then you have a mini home gym wherever you have a closet door
Of course,
this is mostly mobility and endurance training with a little functional seasoning on it
AnyWho, that about sums it up
Check out some of those big neighborhoods for some nice hidden running trails
Buy some cheap equipment and keep it in your car
Google State parks and whenever you have a day off,
I challenge you to visit
And maybe take a Tinder date to a nature preserve or something
Oh, and last grab a Guide or peep the deck if you need some itemized challenges, if you will
Helpful & fun
weaves a bit - newish audience
suburban adventuring
LAST EDITED: 12-29-25
This is a very important column, especially if you are new and you have never joined a gym
If you do not know, it is very, very important to realize that not all gyms are created equal
and unfortunately many are designed to go after your money rather than your satisfaction
This is due to the amount of Fuckery that follows the amount of money involved with personal training,
but that’s a whole Nother column
In short there are three types of gyms,
Small medium large
Shocker, right
But they do carry distinct differences that are often overlooked
Starting with the small gyms
These are often the convenience or specialty gyms
They range between $50-$100 a month on average depending on the level of amenities and hours of operation
But most of these will be 24 hour and usually near highways lol
Equipment here is overall on the nicer end
And if it is managed well,
is a better option for those more serious about their training
Anytime Fitness is a good example
And because each one is a franchise, they very in style in size
A couple things to watch out for,
They almost always come with some kind of sneaky contract
Or if you don’t opt into that,
a very expensive month-to-month option with an expensive hidden annual membership fee
And if they do put you in a contract,
they’ll likely make it very difficult to cancel
Besides that,
the only downsides could be size if you’re more of a people person or if you want more amenities
Moving onto the medium size gyms
These are mostly specialty
Think martial arts or CrossFit
Or really anything in a warehouse
Most of the time these are group classes that may offer open hours
Pricewise they’re gonna be the most expensive usually between $100-$150
They will vary the most as well,
considering how you may have a dingy tae kwon do place in the same category as a top of the line fitness resort
So if you’re looking for a little extra
Or if you like people
This might be a good fit
And then, lastly, we have the large big commercial gyms
These are the most common and the most notorious
They are also the cheapest
They range quite a bit
But due to their size, they do offer unique benefits, that I personally recommend
For example, crunch usually has a functional training area with lots of punching bags in sleds
Which you could never really go wrong with
Planet fitness on the other hand, focuses on machines
and machines..
They really don’t like barbells unless you get into a super fancy one
Which I’m actually hearing about those popping up more and more, which makes me happy
Actually, I do need to clarify a Planet Fitness has changed quite a lot and some of them are very dynamic and offer pretty impressive functional areas
And they’re still really cheap
Actually, the primary gym I go to these days is Planet Fitness cause it’s the closest and they have the nicest cables and machines lol
But I digress
They usually range between $15-$30 a month
They’re fairly convenient usually between 5 AM to 11 PM
Likely closing a few hours early on the weekends
However, if you do not like large crowds or if you were easily intimidated than I highly recommend you avoid these gyms
Especially during peak times
But if you like people watching
Or you like people watching you
Then the energy from a big gym will fuel some of the greatest workouts you’ll ever have
You just wanna avoid the bathroom at all costs
One thing to be aware of with the big commercial gyms is Some may offer more machines and a wider variety
But if the gym is busy, then it can be a nightmare trying to actually use them
The staff is also the worst at the big gyms
And whatever you do - do not sign up for personal training there
99% of the time it is a terrible experience and extremely uncomfortable because you’re gonna be on the same floor as everybody during peak times
and you’re gonna be working with trainers who are likely still amateurs and don’t really know shit
Or might be artists and are narcissistic as fuck
The adepts might be in the medium sized gyms but are probably independent
So AnyWho, if you have any questions about gyms or joining or coaches
or really anything
Feel free to Holla
✌🏻
Helpfiul for newbies
shortish
types of gyms
LAST EDITED: 12-29-25
This is gonna be mostly for beginners or anyone that’s trying to get outdoors without really much current know how
We can break down the types of public trails into three main categories
You have your larger state parks
You have your medium size state parks, or county parks
And then you’ll have your small neighborhood, city or town parks
And then this is where you wanna ask yourself what you’re really going after
Because the larger the park, the larger the trails for obvious reasons
Now most people fall into the category of
“They have something special planned, but they want to do something regular nearby their house to stay in shape”
And that’s really what this whole column is about
Because the right neighborhood park can keep you in fantastic shape
But strategically sprinkling in something with some elevation or some added elements will not only keep your daily maintenance training exciting but also have you perfectly set up for any kind of major event
Starting with the small and the most accessible
Assuming that you’re in some kind of major metropolitan ish area
You’re gonna wanna look into any nature preserves first
These are gonna be the nicest, quietest, most scenic
and usually best maintained
depending on the area that could be the best kept secret-
Or it could be pretty popular
But more than anything, they’re perfect for trail running basics
And seeing some cool birds or deer
Next are your medium sized parks
Usually anything with a lake
Or camping
These can be some of the best secrets in the entire country because they can be big enough to feel endless and small enough to feel private
They can have some of the greatest elements and amenities while being the most convenient
These are all pretty self-explanatory to find from a quick Google search
So what I’m really trying to help you out with is narrowing down your short list
The medium size parks are usually gonna be between and a half hour to an hour drive
Perfect for 1 to 2 hour long training session
Or a nice afternoon, mini hike
Depend, depending where you live, you might be able to find someone with some pretty steep hills and many different trail options as well
And these will have great hybrids
And make perfect training options
Generally recommend trying to make it to one of these once every 2 to 3 weeks if your lifestyle allows
Because if you can get a good 10 mile training hike in every two weeks then you’ll be in a really good spot no matter what
And that kind of leaves us to the next big thing is the major parks
Which at that point if you’re willing to travel more than two hours, then I recommend going for the experience
So in that case really just focus on what we kind of already talked about regarding just training for that
Cause there’s nothing else I could really add a value about those lol
AnyWho, thanks for reading. I hope you found this briefly helpful.
Please schedule a consult if you have any questions or like some custom programming on getting more active
Peace ✌🏻
Simple and sweet
Pretty direct as far as training tips
Consult pitch at the end
trail types
LAST EDITED: 12-29-25
Let’s keep it real
Most people have no clue what to do in the weight room to have a carry over to the woods
Besides just some silly farmers carries, of course
What I’m really talking about is mobility/endurance/strength techniques that not only help you climb the hill with more weight with better ease,
but recover from it fast faster so you can do it again the next day
Starting with the foundation, you’re gonna need to examine your mobility
By scrolling on Instagram,
you’re gonna get pitched all kinds of things like kettle bells, or sleds or bodyweight or even bodybuilding
But this is where it’s important to define exactly what all you are going after
You know in the woods and wild
to be able to hike five or 10 miles is very easy
To be able to hike over 10 miles with 10 to 20 pounds is also somewhat easy
Both of these two things pretty much anyone can do any given weekend as long as they’re not actively injured
And as long as someone gives them enough snacks
But once you cross the 10 miles on any given day,
you begin to separate the sedentary from the activists
Pretty much any activist will be able to survive a 10 mile mild hike
Assuming the conditions are “normal”
So speaking about the physical movement, demand demands only
If you don’t have much elevation to work with,
Then you’re really talking about durability of your ankles, knees, hip flexors,
and some base zone two oxidative conditioning
So if you’re working up to about a 10 mile hike
then all you really need to do is about 3 miles a day- every other day
And bonus points for adding in a 10 or 20 pound weight vest
And then I can pretty much guarantee you’ll be resilient enough to be back to work the day after 10 mile hike
I’ve seen it many times
Now from here,
we began talking about elevation or increasing the distance
Or finally increasing the elements, such as whether and terrain and all
But we’ll save that for the athletes lol
First things first
the stairmaster is not going to drastically improve your endurance for elevation training
It might be a decent option to set up a base foundation for your hip flexors
And God forbid you encounter a couple flights of stairs in the wild,
then you’ll be able to handle them with ease
But really you just need to make sure that your mobility and your range of motion per stride keep you in your zone two
or maybe just baby bouncing into zone three with your breathing
The second we start going uphill is the second everybody starts getting burnt out
This is because you’ll begin to recruit your type two muscles and whatever glycogen you have on standby at first
But once that energy runs out and your muscles begin to get a little shaky, it’s gonna get brutal to go any kind of distance
And that is because once you start using the wrong muscle for the wrong movement, you’re gonna have a bad time
So if you’re talking about a mild duration with mild elevation,
Then you’re really talking about being smart enough not to work too hard
Because, and I mean this with love,
This is geared towards those who might be on the weaker side
Cause If you’re already in good enough shape to survive some dumb shit,
then you probably don’t need to worry about a 10 mile hike
But once we start talking about 15 miles or more
and 3000 feet of elevation gain or more
on any given day,
then we start talking about legitimate challenges
And for anything long duration,
fueling, and managing your tempo is going to be the most important thing
There are no amount of type two hiking muscles in the world that you can build
that are gonna hold enough glycogen to survive an eight hour- 3000 foot elevation hike
But if you stay in your zone two oxidative zone
and you use the right muscles throughout the whole hike,
then you can very comfortably burn fat as long as you’re hydrated
You know,
cause that’s exactly how the human body was built
And on that note,
let’s say you already have the base muscle foundation to where
as long as you’re not an ass hat & you’re not sore after a…
For example’s sake..
A 5 mile steep hike,
Then your primary focus should be on staying in zone two and not getting greedy
So for you athletes,
while you’re in the gym,
you can focus on some climbing hypertrophy work
As simple as it sounds
But adding in a lot of varying tempo light elevation training
(As close to real world setting as you can get
So find a trail if you can)
-Will set you apart
Don’t waste your time having super crazy intense long sessions inside the gym,
Just focus on some functional strength and mobility movements
Now, if you’re looking at multiple day hikes and extreme elevation,
Then you’re gonna need to strategize on being able to carry a lot of weight
Which is really just gonna be mostly food lol
Because if you can build up enough muscle and energy storage to survive between one feeding window to the next
You’ll be fine as long as you can Feed yourself as fast as you work.
Although obviously,
the more grueling the hike,
the more of a technical ass kicking you’re gonna get
And soreness is really a result from a misappropriation
So if your sore the next day,
that means that we likely used a little bit too much of the wrong gear for too long
Which again, is pretty much unavoidable with really intense hikes
So our best bet is to maximize our energy intake to help offset any waste throughout
And generally speaking on a super long hike,
as long as you make it past halfway while efficiently managing your food,
Then the second half can be kind of easy if you have extra fuel
Going back a little bit,
the training process for something that intense is going to require high-level plyometrics
As well as true strength endurance training
And this is where your lifting and fitness experience are extremely important
Because if you are new,
then this is somewhat of a waste cause you might just end up creating bad habits that will get you more tired on the trail
But if you are highly experienced in,
this can be a game changer because it’ll teach your body a new way to manage its energy expenditure
And the secret summed up is really your mind muscle and energy pathway connection is what is going to help you survive physically in the woods
Well, enough to go to the office the next day if that’s what you’re up to
So AnyWho, check out the training deck for plenty of movements that are “trail approved”
And as long as you diversify and your program in some cardio, you’ll be able to make it through just about any hike up to 50 miles without having to do too much extra training beyond baseline