Here’s a fun game-
Give people a dollar every time they’ve admitted they were wrong
Need a new wall called “arguments against atheists”
…
..
.
It’s just gonna be pictures of the pyramids
Before we nuke anyone,
we should dose their water supply with psilocybin.
But only right after we dose our own decision makers…
If you’re having a bad day,
then repeat after me:
Bitchassness be gone
Bitchassness be gone
Bitchassness be gone
The secret to communication is simply tone management
It’s an old trick, but a good one-
If you put on a show about something shitty, you’re gonna instantaneously feel better about whatever is going on
Pretty much as long as you give a timid person a little bit of reassurance, they’ll likely like you forever
“I understand you are having a rough morning brother,
Have you tried listening to some Creed yet?”
1. Ain’t no other way
2. Trust the process
3. Get started
4. Write it out
5. Talk it out
6. Be honest
7. Be willing
8. Get ready to make it right
9. Grow up time
10. Keep your word
11. Update / upgrade
12. Give it away to keep it
On bad days, you can be as depressed as you want after
- Praying about it (like you mean it)
- Making any amends esp if you’ve been a sour puss recently
- Walk 2 miles (or 10 min minimum)
- Get sunlight (if possible)
- Complete one sincere act of kindness
- Get cold frfr for at least 30 seconds if possible
- Do something physically challenging for 30 seconds
- Eat 100 g of protein (protein shakes if you have to)
- take a salt tablet
- Writing about it best you can for 3 minutes
- Asking somebody else how they’re doing
The true muscles and movements
Think;
- Super Walmart size & set up
- Gym by day / club by night
- Part Bouncy house / arcade
- Resort/ recovery style amenities
- Ft. Martial arts dojos/ art boutiques
- Gourmet PB&J / natural meat restaurants
- Cannabis / coffee shops / lounge
Best to invest now
You don’t want to be on the outside of this one
If you can’t find a sled, then just sneak into Costco and put a bunch of shit on your cart
Maybe we should bring back legitimate duels.
Sometimes you gotta go to extremes to prove a point apparently..
Just write something you think you would like to read to yourself later
Then read it later and decide what to do with it then
A suburban snack snatch is when you take the biggest handful you can of the snack you can fit in your hand(s)
and hide the bag as fast as you can before finishing the handful
the key to immortality is just simply not getting stressed over dumb shit
or running too many unnecessary intellectual tabs in the back of your brain
You shouldn’t make people do 24 hours in jail,
You should make them do 24 miles on the trail without their drug of choice.
I promise you they’ll remember that more than jail in all of the best and worst ways
CRAZY BUT MIGHT WORK
Trust a jacked prisoners’s health advice before you trust a fat doctor*
At 21 I would advise caution when pursuing what you love
At 31 I would advise urgency
When lifting at a new gym, it’s beneficial to hang out in the corner for a few to get the lay of the land
Sometimes when you are sad, you can listen to something sad, which makes you more sad which somehow makes you feel better
Whenever you fold money, always fold with the low bills on the outside
Never let them know what’s inside*
You should write down your prayers every now and then just to make sure they haven’t been dipped into some kind of weird repressed sexual shit
Example:
“ Come into me, oh Lord, and ravish me
Make me yours and show me the truth “
The proper technique for getting a cat to chill:
* snatch cat
* Place cat in cozy or comfy position
* Beg the gods to make the cat stay put
* Cry in pain when cat leaves
* Remember to enjoy the 3.6 seconds
If you ever need to find an AA meeting,
then just go to a church around sunset and drive around looking for a group of people chain-smoking and drinking coffee
My life experience has shown me that it is foolish to wait for an apology
But it is wise to apologize as quickly as possible
Thinking you’re right all the time is a good way to stay in the wrong
Thinking you’re wrong most of the time is a good way to get it right
Always underestimate calories when bulking
Always overestimate calories if cutting*
A walk in the woods will do more for your health than walking into your doctor’s office
Just about everyone gonna cringe at you no matter what for something,
Better you can laugh at you or else you’ll go insane
It’s wise to talk in metaphors and parables because it forces a motherfucker to choose what they hear
At the end of the day, you still need to be nice to the ego if you want it to do shit..
And give it a lil treat
Pay close attention to how people treat you when they think you failed