Good morning world 
*5:00 am $

Anyone else absolutely hopeless with remembering names during movies and shows? $

*opens suspicious dehydrated “broccoli rice”
Dear god, it’s your boy…. $

Straight up- it takes me so long to remember who’s who that I often delay starting new shows $

I keep falling asleep to ancient aliens
Then it keeps playing while I’m asleep
So I’ve probably downloaded dozens of hours of high strangeness $

The simplest explanation is that there are beings that can move so fast we can’t perceive them $$

Or we move so slow that we can’t process fast enough $$

Slept great { 1st sleep }
All 4.2 hrs $

Aiming for 3.3ish for 2nd sleep $

Experience will teach you how to tactfully stir the pot $$

Got an old Rich Piana video playin for motivation 
Gotta love bulk season $

Fit peoples’ fav thing to do is talk about themselves 
Point proven $$

If I were you, I’d stop saying “if I were you” $$$

There are no absolutes in nature other than their stupidity $

It’s funny but it’s fucked $$

Nobody believes in God cuz it sounded cool
It’s cuz they had their teeth kicked in by life and only one power saved them
(They know cuz theyve literally tried everything else) $$$

Good news- I’ve prepped 120ish social media shorts
Bad news- I’ve got to review 120ish of my own shit 😂😂😂 $

“You wanna party just let me know. I’m always around” $

Can’t wait to be tempted by everything I’ve ever wanted $$

I’m weird
I don’t want to say more than 5 words to a stranger on a walk but I’d also gladly spend 5 days in the woods with a stranger $

Kinda sus that All of my “friends” are involved with Hollywood $

Remembering the LGI interviews…
(muscling thru life) $

I’m from “oh-my-god” Nebraska
Omaha? $
 
I gotta say
As many hours as I’ve spent in big commercial gyms 
I’ve never had a truly bad or weird experience in the locker rooms $

It’s mostly just dirty bathrooms that you gotta worry about $

I’ll admit I was an alcoholic in a previous life or two but
I don’t understand how you could drink more than 1 night a week 
Like, it just feels so icky so fast $

Sticky Icky can mean different things to different people 
(Learned the hard way) $$$

As a strength coach, I’ve learned how to show “the process” as “the presentation” $$

Impossible to state the importance of free speech $$$

If I wanna talk about lifting stones and the process of being one in-between lifts then I should be allowed to $$

And if anyone says you’re not allowed to do something… 🤜🏻 (intellectually knuckle sandwich)

“I don’t trust people with pony tails”
-me: “see that’s exactly why I won’t get a tail” $

My shit’s nearly long enough 
(Hair) $

Mind reading is actually easy to do
It’s just unbelievably difficult to learn $$$

Exponential growth means that you grow more the next day than the previous 2 combined
*loads bowl $$

Smart sentences are too slick to be stopped by the super serious sad strangers who are secretly running the “sad” simulation $

Judgement is the most important thing to balance 
Otherwise you’ll swing between self crucifixion and masterbation $$

Bro auto correct is trying to change masterbation to “master nation”
WTF $

To be extraordinary 
Just do the ordinary but be extra about it $$

Synchronicity is when two or more elements meet
So Time is just measuring synchronicity 
*lighter flick $$

Everything is either orbiting or bouncing back and forth $$

Attentiveness to detail is verything $$

“Seems like your subconscious is talking shit man” $$$

Always always always investigate those who are proactively trying to help you
They’re usually just trying to help themselves in the worst way $$$

We are all selling something 
Most people’s sales process is just trash $$

house parties in the lower middle class suburbs hit different $$

“I don’t wanna brag but I do a pretty great “Omar” from the HBO program “the wire “” $

Fuck it
Oatmeal time 🥣 $

Fuck that was good oatmeal 🥣 $

*starts pinc… Pinciho….
*pauses movie
“Pinocchio” @ 6:42am $

Whenever they open with an old timey scene -
It’s gonna slap or flop fast $$

Need to loosen up the legs now
*grabs roller $

Feel like today is gonna be a good writing day 
I’ve been up since 4:20 AM 
Not tired at all 
Gonna lay down and idle for a bit before first lift 
Maybe shoot some shit who knows $

AI algorithms can’t keep up with ADHD 
I said it $$$

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-2-25

Went to the movies at 4:20 instead of midnight $

You don’t have to agree with everything I say I just hope you enjoy reading it more than another boring fitness blog $

It’s OK if shit gets out of order as long as it doesn’t get out of hand $$

“Fuck yea that’s 16 eggs in 3 hours”
*burps
“What did you nerds do with your Friday night?” $

Watching “Now you see me”
So good $

Had to leave my phone in other room so I wouldn’t miss the movie $

It’s 6:06am now
Bout 7 or 8 hits deep
Bout to hit a Power Nap before Power lift (legs) $

“Truth” is every 30yr old f*ck boys fav word
Most just use it ironically $

As a recovering Cajun, I try to limit my spices to my vocabulary $

If you have long hair, you probably do care $$

“Eggs & tea are actually pretty good together”
-says the Lancaster in me $

*loud bang from kitchen
**cat speeds away 
Motherf*cker… $

Need to upload a bunch of the simple demo videos $

Note to self- no need to take as many notes on self $$$

To understand true love you must understand true loneliness $$

I wonder if anyone will know I have the word “fuck” secretly concealed within the art on my wall $

Because loneliness is the greatest illusion $$

When it’s for the love of the lift 
You’ll hate rest days $$

Call me the boy who never took a rest day $

I have had way more training sessions than calendar days $

Some of yall have never double scooped your PRE and it shows $

Any action fully governed by your ego will feel easy $$

Any action challenging your ego will feel uncomfortable $$

Whatever you create is whatever destroys you $$

Destruction is fun if you do it right $$

Muscle shit for too long and you’ll wake up with all kinds of weird aches and pains $$$

Awareness = control
Awareness of awareness = flow $$

lol got a glute cramp $

Beauty is born in bullshit $$

I am pushing the “bare minimum” to the max $$

First of all, times not real
Secondly, neither was yesterday $

It’s not what you have, it’s what you are
& What you are is what you’ve done
So if you haven’t done shit… $

*clears throat
Cant move without friction 
Can’t have friction without form 
Can’t have form without separation 
Can’t have separation without a separator 
Have have a separator without a creator
Can’t have a creator without the created
Can’t have the created without movement
Can’t have movement without friction 
Any questions ? $

2/3 of most deadly killers in the world are likely in your medicine cabinet $$$

If you can’t have a conversation with someone without them getting upset, that’s not your fault $$

Only narcissists weaponize your own emotions against you 
and blame you for it $$$

If you hit your protein goal 6/7 days, you won’t know you missed the 7th $$

Im so stoned i may be nearly Asian by now
But still not sleepy lol $

Say what you will about real estate but that shits the financial wilderness 
Takes avg 6-9 months for each lead to close
Less than 1% conv rate
Nobody wants anything to do with you for atleast 3 yrs
You eat what you kill
You pay for all your own shit
You are constantly meeting strangers in strange but intimate places
You have a reputable stench just for having a license
Even when you do close a deal, 80% of the time whatever you did, was unnecessary and is actively being replaced
And I still sold dozens of houses before the age of 30 🕶️🧢🃏 $

The more you believe in it, the more energy you receive from doing it $$

ADHD is just alternating between things you really want to quit and others that you can’t stop 
At various speeds $$

These days, 
Words on paper may not be as powerful as words online $$

Say what you will about personal training but that role is the most physically demanding 
if done right, something is always nearly destroyed
You work insane hrs and usually split between multiple shifts
You are always moving 20-50lbs, Even when you’re not training 
No matter how tired or sore you are, you must be able to demonstrate how to fail 
If you cheat too many times everyone will know
Your body is your business so you must live like an athlete 
The level of daily discipline required to not lose your mind is about as challenging as it gets
All rage gets channeled into your training 
Which gets channelled into your soreness $

your programming is your business too so you are part teacher $

Athletes are usually not great teachers lol $$

Digital words are more mobile than physical words but usually not as strong or durable $$

Hmm,
 this whole process started 4yrs ago when I used to watch a lot of mythbusters
Now it’s found its way back onto my TV $

Sugar brings out my shittalk
Explains my behavior in grade school… $

Took me long enough to read the writing on the wall
I was too busy writing on it $

Remembering how 4 years ago this time I’d be showing some random ass house then binging Netflix $

Thank god for the mysteries $

So stoked for second session $

A good brand is worth 1000 good bands $

I recognize a sales process when I see one… $

Everyone’s a critic $$

In a world of critics
Be a mirror $$$

Mirrors are shiny af $

You need an icon or figurehead for change
You need someone the people can rally behind
A once-in-a-generation personality $

Why I feel slight but distinct temp changes when I write that lol
And slight toe tickles 
My AC is off and ain’t shit ticklin my toe rn $

 dudes need to understand that if they just talked to the notepad like they talked to their matches on tinder, they would uncover their muse 
Didn’t say it be a hot muse tho… $

Can’t wait for spooky season $

It’s important to use proper {writing}technique to avoid {emotional} injury $$

I think I can make it in time if I hit the boosters just right $

*sits in recliner
Alrighty time to smoke some buds and bust some myths 
*starts mythbusters $

If this works, im a genius 
If not, then a comedian $

Philosophy is the key to not losing your shit $$

These carbs are manifesting thru my language this time instead just anxiety $

Might have to do some lunges or some shit 😂😂 $

“Yall better film this in case I land it”
-my motto $$

This time it’s the athlete who becomes the artist $

The big buff guy becomes the sweet sensitive guy $

Exercise is just a game of energy management $$

You can view it almost like the reverse of saving money $

Love when I pack a bowl but forget briefly then remember and get excited again 🥣 $

I learned the dark side of the sales force $

“After spending the entire night hiding in the fridge, Rhonda leaves the abandoned apartment “
😂😂😂 $

To get stronger, you wanna make sure that you are focusing on how much resistance you can handle
To get bigger, you need to focus on how long you can handle a medium level of resistance $$

Technique is just wisdom in motion $$$

Love how it’s called G force $

Almost everything is easier to show than it is to tell $$

It took me a while to see the wisdom, in the Simon says $

I said a lot, but if you’re hungry enough, you’ll eat eggs with a smile $

Almost everything is better with hot sauce $

The wisest wisdom is concise $$

Oh Jesus I forgot how big of a crush I used to have on Cary 
😂😂😂she’s pregnant in this episode $

Stick to the process and do what must be done
You’ll know what must be done based on how it makes you feel when you think about it $$

“this burned man” will teach you discernment $$

Start with the thoughts that won’t go away $$

Bro true crime shows always put me to sleep
Shows like “I almost got away with it” or “lockup”
lol why tf my spirit relate to them so much huh 🤔 $

These shows are content gold tho 
Especially if I put on my Righteous Hat 🎩 $

Ehh I think ima play bong roulette and celebrate actually posting something 😂😂😂 $

Friday night notes be 🔥 $

I may be the lamest 31 yr old of all time(s) but hey, I have a good time(s) $

Salesmanship governs penmanship $$

Cuz wtf you gonna write about? $$

My lines twerk. Twerk twerk $

My lines like up everytime $

Okay maybe not EVERY $

“You betcha brother” 
-the whites prob $
 
God is good. So good. 
*lighter flick $

Fuck I gotta edit yesterday’s $

I edited yesterday’s (and 101’s). Ngl, didn’t hate it
So that’s positive haha $

You’re gonna have to learn how to forget faster than you forget if you want to be happy $

I’ve been doing up a meeting that I can play the part of every single person in there
That doesn’t mean I’d enjoy it though $

The truth doesn’t have to be edited, which saves alot of time $$

Every flaw has a function $$$

“Step on a crack and break your moms back” really f*cked me up in grade school
For like 3 or 4 years 
Guess it’s Where my fear of taking steps began $


Okay see if you notice a pattern- $

“We Were where we’re walking Wednesday. “ $

Wow, what wonderful women. $

Washing & waving while watering Wallace’s willows. $

Well, 
Wilson wasn’t wanting wasted writing…. $

“Was Waiting was willingly”
“Welcome?”- Wilson wondered
William whispered: 
Wat $

Well well, looks like we’re at the 
End of the line(s) $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-3-25

Those who never gave up can easily spot those who did $$$

ADHD is probably just spiritual hazing
I mean initiation $$

Dying for something is not nearly as meaningful as devoting your entire life to it $$$

Better to be a hard working asshat than a lazy therapist $$

Always hear others out but listen only to yourself $$

At some point, We all gotta take our turns wearing the “ass hat” 
Some people just don’t want to take it off $$

This is one of those mornings where I woke up feeling extra fresh
lol not even meaning that as a joke
Was like a power sleep
So good
*loads bowl $

How you treat others is important but only as important as you treat yourself $$

Some positions take multiple lifetimes to reach $$$

Fucking milk drinkers… $

Milk is nutritious 
It’s also weird to drink $$

Being a pretentious lil bitch is actually un-American 
Most have it backwards $$

This is as close to sleep writing as it gets $

There’s a long waiting list to enter this world 
Because of the limited space in our current timeline $$

Nothing enters this reality without a primary goal and an opportunity for bonus points $$$

The key to being concise with your writing is editing everything 9 times $$$

The test of time:
- 3 min
- 3 hr
- 3 days
- 1 week
- 1 month 
- 1 year
- This year
- Last year
- Year prior
- Prior 4 yr term $

Amazing what you think you can get away with if you think nobody is watching $$

God damn I fucking love 3am weed and movies bro $

So peaceful 
Everyone’s sleepin
Instead of bitchin $

The “Live like you are dying” philosophy refers to the “life review” part 
Not the “sleeping with randoms” part $$

Remembering how, when I was in jail,
The scariest mfer in there
Was in there for fishing without a license $

He was the only guy I told that I was “still holding” before they released me $

Remembering how I got arrested with 1.3gs 
And got out 13hrs later with it
And blazed the best blunt
Brother $

Need to start a new column “can’t make this up” $

Truthfully 
I’m sure I would have “sold out” long time ago if given the chance
Thankfully, i was never given the chance $

I’ve sold just about everything except my dignity $

My ball(s) and word(s)
All I’ve got in this life
(And it’s more than enough) * $

Even my speech does calisthenics $

God prob has a mixtape of all my car & Shower signing 
God help em $

Aesthetics Are All About Angles $$

Gotta do something 5 times before it’s impressive $$

Impress?
Oh, You mean M- press $

Exercises that should not be taken literally:
- back extension 
- Skull crushers
- Crunches
- Jumping jack
- Spider curl
- Deadlift
- Dead hang $

Exercises we wish we could take literally 
- flys $

Good thing is if I ever start dating again,
All she’ll need to do is read my notepad
That’ll help avoid wasted time 😂😂😂 $

She’ll never be able to accuse me of cheating 
No way someone can afford a side relationship when they talk to themselves this much $

The most secretive secrets are hidden in plain sight $$

Best to gently puncture the veil
Not smash it to pieces $$

Easy for me to say but I’m glad women wear bras 
Cuz if they didn’t, it wouldn’t be super awesome when they don’t $

There’s no real aesthetic reason why titties are so beautiful
 but they are
 Most amazing double pointy pepperoni flesh blobs $

Obv men love breast cuz it reminds them of mommy
But do women feel the same way? $

watching “trading places”
About a group of old whites who troll the fuck outta this dude who’s the modern day “Job” (just not as cool)
Meanwhile they sponsor Eddie Murphy and give him all “Jobs” shit (after being racist af behind closed doors)
In some ways, Job had it coming so nobody gave a fuck for a while
Not until he ate his humble pie 
Meanwhile Eddie seems to be maturing $

Shouldn’t say “Sexy slaves” …. $$

Nobody believes you can be framed for shit until you see frames of shit $$

A Guitarist’s fingers will need to callus
For A comedian, his soul $$

Love how eddie’s street smarts save the day $

when blazing new paths and strains become one = Synchronicity $$

You don’t understand “Hugs not drugs” until you’ve done a shit load of drugs $$$

Putting the Prof. in proficiency $$

Your either playing for it or paying for it or praying for it
Doesn’t matter what “it” is $

The last hit of the session is always a victory hit $$

Fuck that ham looks good
All I got is eggs…. $

This broke writer phase has to end eventually 
Until then, I’ll consume 300 eggs before my integrity $

You gotta remember that earth is just a spiritual school
Think frequency adjustment dial $$

And that the most important communication takes place in the sphere of angels
Outside the corruptible grasp of the ego $$

Ego is a reducing value 
An incredibly important and valuable valve 
Without it, the madness and meaninglessness of eternity 
But it it overly develops, it’ll reduce love to the extent of emotional death followed by physical death $$

A drunk Santa is concerning no matter the time or place or body fat % $$$

Gentlemen who have to try to be gentle are not men
They’re boys $$$

Ugh I should prob eat… $

Pets are the cutest constructs $$

I know I said earth is a spiritual school, but maybe it’s a school located within the psych ward $$

Technically speaking,
The school within the rehab I went to was my 4th lol $

Somewhere we got so off track that I have to teach mfers just how to “be” $

Some days the intellectual echo is deafening $

Musey be feeling extra talkie today I guess $

G’damn Shawty 
got them good glutes $

“Best way to hurt rich people is to turn them into poor people”
*clears bowl $$

Time for 2nd sleep 😴 $

When dealing with a mentalist, 
Just understand that by the time you are thinking about them, it’s too late $$$

Before caffeine: I don’t wanna do shit
After caffeine: why it take so long to build Rome $$

The split second right before a lift is the most important as that reflects your intent $$

I have seen what happens when you hijack someone’s biology and it’s not pretty $

Learning is just the process of failing in the most productive way possible $$$

The second greatest fear is failure
The first is success $$$

The rapture is really just a point of spiritual understanding that you cannot come back from
Can be a good or bad thing
But either way- it’s a paradigm shifter $$$

Did you hear the words that just went thru my head? $

If you like yourself, you will not care who else does $$$

You shouldn’t fly to new heights without first understanding every square inch of the ground $$$

Remember how that ball fit 
into that cube 
that fit into that other ball 
inside that other cube? $

Give me 2 scoops and 4 hits and we’ll be off to the race(s) $

Better to give people a challenge than a hand
But I’ll hand you a challenge $$

Some exercises shouldn’t be taken literally $$

Some exercises are more spiritual than others $$

The deadlift is the most spiritual exercise 
The hip thrust is the most egoic $$

It’s a good thing most exercises are not to be taken literally 
But you should still train as if they might be one day
*deadlift warm ups $

Better to have 12 reps of gold than 12 sets of shit** $$$

Still there-
Rain or shine I was still there 
Snow and sleet I was still there 
Tornadoes and hurricanes and I was still there 
Pandemics and riots and I was still there 
Sitting in the back, talking shit to myself, most likely about myself, but I was still there 
The meeting before the meeting, the meeting during the meeting, and the meeting after the meeting, I was there 
The out-of-the-way car rides , the broken coffee pots, and all the old shitty chairs I was there
In front of the podium and behind it, I was there 
When nobody else had arrived yet, and the parking lot was rainy and empty, I was there

When the doors were locked, and nobody else had a key, I unlocked them 
When someone new arrived and they didn’t know what to do, I helped them 
When I was losing my mind and there was nobody I could talk to, I still picked up the phone
When I had nowhere else to go and no idea what to do, I still showed up 
And when it all stopped working due to no fault of my own, 
I just had to modify things a bit $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-4-25

Kinda hard to stay in the creative mindset when you’re concerned about what you’re going to have for dinner but here we are $

I hate how easily money motives destroy the fun $

Doesn’t matter the sitt.
If you threaten anyone’s life 
(including your own) 
you’re being a lil bitch $

Wonder how long it’s gonna take me to run out of shit to say 
Probably 3 or 4 months at the least $

Motivation comes in many forms 
Having a “child” is the most frightening $

Hard to see what you’re not looking for $

Today was clearly a light day… $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-5-25

Gotta bounce back on that ass $

If you want it bad enough, you’ll gladly miss meals for it $$$

If you want it bad enough, you’ll enjoy the suck $$

Not sure how I got here but I’m almost done watching Twilight (1st one)
Never see it before ok don’t judge 
Tbh- It’s cheesy but not awful $

Sorry not sorry but every nurse I’ve ever met has turned out to be crazy 
I’m sure it’s just a “me” thing tho… $

3rd shift ain’t that bad
Has a nice ring to it $

Stoned, not shaken $$

This bitch clingy af tho. 🚩 $

Ego will have you look in a mirror and deny what’s there
Ego will also have you make everything about yourself $$

No I didn’t make it to prom. Was too busy snorting xannys in the Cut $

Remember this one time how I skipped class to take my friend to the dentist
(And turn up on a Tuesday)
And I got caught, and instead of detention, they just suspended me for 180 days
I was 16. What a year $

I’m actually glad I didn’t go to prom. Woulda done something dumb and got in trouble anyway.
So it’s better I got myself thrown out months in advance. $

Remembering how this one cold Sunday afternoon in January 
my friend and I walked 3 miles to Pizza Hut 
Then another 3 miles back to the spot in the woods to eat it
And to get litty titty from some mystery liquor 
We shared the headphones (one each) from my old iPod nano 
Some slices of super dank pepperoni 
and a buzz that’ll last the ages
(The spot was called “white chairs”) $

Love how most people thought I died when I finally started living $

Deadass
Writing is harder than deadlifts $$

Let’s just say prisoners get really good at push ups $$

Now I’m watching “Enders Game” $

Love how the drill sergeant is yelling at the kids $

Remembering the time I did the “scared straight” program at the county jail
The day after I discovered 4 lokos $
…..
I showed up smelling like alcohol and they made me do push ups until I threw up everywhere 
Then left me alone with a convicted murdered while I had to clean it up $

If the CIA has been evaluating me my whole life, 
They are probably most impressed by my Skyrim builds $

Any large group in matching uniforms is almost always atleast a little creepy $

If the gov. need cyber soldiers, they need look no further than my KD on COD (adjusted for lag ofc) $

Who knew shapes and icons could contain hidden messages 
……. 
All ancient peoples everywhere 
…..
Oh, right lol $

Easy,
I’d just convince my enemy to chill tf out $

Hate to say it but 
A good nemesis is better for your well being than a good friend $$

“Flapping around like a bunch of drunken ducks”
Umm odd choice of metaphor but ok $

Their training looks like a cute warm up
…. I find myself saying that a lot 🤔 $

I sell techniques for building consistency $

Can’t be consistent with what you don’t enjoy for very long $$

If you need ideas on how to find new ways to pick up heavy shit- oh man do I have good news for you $

“Drop and give me 20”
*laughing
“Spoken like an amateur” $

Can’t stand mfers who don’t understand the basics but think they’re strategic masters 
I am usually “mfers” $

Just gonna throw it on out there
Trusting anything new sucks $

“Before we make him a leader, let’s see how he deals with frustration “
OKAY YOUVE PROVED YOUR POINT $

LOVE HOW AUTOCORRECT FORGETS ITS JOB THE SEXOND SHIT LEVELS UP $

sorry, didn’t mean to yell $

It’s 1:39am and there’s nothing left to do but some bong hypertrophy $

I’d fuck a mfer up if they said shit like that… $

Send you to back to Jesus as an ambassador for why you shouldn’t talk shit $

Telling the truth is the greatest idiot repellent of all time $$

That dudes nose is as big as his ego $

Short guys are always the most angry… $$$

The bigger the ego, 
the greater the strength 
but the lower the endurance $$

Remember Masterplans are developed in reverse $$$

Playing dead is such a sneaky move
Who would ever think to do that… $

If you care a lot about credit then you probably don’t care that much about others $

Can’t wait to make these dudes look foolish $

Shoulda trusted the process and not the penis $$

Remembering the time a random ass wasp materialized next to my coffee table 
(I released him unharmed) $

Not proud of the amount of bugs I’ve killed… $

Ever be swimming and suddenly feel a warm patch?
Ever be chilling and suddenly feel a cold patch?
Idk Which is scarier $

lol probably bout to eat my last serving of eggs $

Ahh very nice
We’re at the part in the movie when the smart but misfit kid starts to lead his futuristic dragon army of other misfits 
So cool $

Coming up with shit isn’t nearly as important as being able to sort thru the shit
(Says one plumber to the other) $

99% is still incomplete $$$

Man some people were really born to play the role of “bitch ass lil bitch” huh $

Never ever ever 
Never never never never ever never ever
Quit 
Never $$$

The single greatest and scariest thing is being yourself under ANY and ALL circumstances $$

I wonder what kind of hell the funniest person in the world has to go thru… $

Carbs are very hit or miss after midnight $$$

Always assume the other is smarter than you
Either way you’ll be pleasantly surprised $$

If you got the pathways, never fear a mfer who doesn’t $$$

Selling anything will teach you not to care about “no” $$

Go do in home sales and you’ll see the dark side of rhetoric $$

Remembering all those supervisor takeover calls… $

For a while my main job was to keep people from jumping out of the window $$$

If someone reacts negatively to your good deed, it’s because you reminded them that they missed an opportunity to do the same $$

When lifting at a new gym, it’s beneficial to hang out in the corner for a few to get the lay of the land $$

Everyone can write
Few can edit $$$

Don’t get into bed with someone unless you’ve seen them change the sheets $$

The odds of you swiping right in your soul mate are less than .000001% $$$

Concealment isn’t lying
It’s concealment $$$

Most would go to any lengths to avoid change
So God help you if you represent change $$$

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-6-25

Watching “Gone Girl” $

Which if you’ve never seen it….
BRO $

Talk about a mind fuck and nightmare rolled into one… $

Love the witty “pick up” banter as if it’s somehow original $

A bad relationship is instinctually cringey $

If meth is even just a bit stronger than Adderall,
I can understand why the nazis thought they were the shit $

Do it while it’s hard and you’ll be a legend when it’s easy $$$

I fuckin love cats so much $

I’m like 60/40 type A vs B
But my chill, type B side is smarter than my type A 
He just never gets anything done $

Can’t spell Assisted without Ass $$

Marriage is the most functional construct to understanding Hell (learn about yourself)
Second, is childhood (learn about power over others) $$

My childhood lasted 31 fucking years lol $

I wear my sunglasses at night (metaphorically speaking) $

In all seriousness I am likely legally blind by now (without my Glasses) $

“Well talk in-between shampoos” $

Someone’s gotta be the creepy detective to go thru the underwear drawer $

They got the hot blonde power mom lady playing the lead “take no shit” detective 
Or is she the “seen it all” detective 🤔 $

Can’t spell association without ass and CIA $$$*

Don’t trust writers who don’t lift
They don’t know their own strength $$

It’s like an intellectual portal opens between 1-3 am $

The deeper in the shit you go, the more miraculous the escape plan gets
Therefore the better the story $

Bro YouTube free movies be 🔥 
Like for major titles that might be aging slightly- it’s dope 
(Seems like the theme with YT) $

This bitch goes missing then suddenly clues start showing up
It’s usually the other way around $

Two FFs means fucking finally $$

Can’t spell efficiently without two FFs $$

Two Ts means too technical 
Can’t spell Jarrett without getting too technical $$

Seriously- my name is the most misspelled of all time due to the difficulty in audibly distinguishing the J and Rs and Ts.
“Hey Garrett, Jared, Jerry”
Don’t even get me started with Francois $

Can’t spell Francois without OIS
OIS means “Oh it sucked” $

Sus lead girl (who goes missing)- “Suddenly I knew everything was about to get worse”
*loading bong
Me- “Fucking better not…”$

If you’re brave enough to suck then you’re cool enough to party $$$

Most people don’t care about actually improving the well being of others
(Requires tough logic)
They just care about caring
(Requires none) $$

Never underestimate a narcissist’s ability to make it about themselves $$$*

Wait hot blonde cop milf lady isn’t blonde anymore 
She ain’t taking no shit but she can take this….$

Don’t think you ain’t thought about it $

Hmm mysterious rumbling from dark dining den $

I don’t need x ray vision when I have “bitch assness” vision $$

What if sharks are just mad they can’t hug you $
 
Sharks are just aquatic T Rex’s (the T is for Tubular) $$$

Oh I fucking knew this due was a cheater $

Women ages 21-29 are the most dangerous creatures in the universe 
And the most valued $

Guess all professors bang the hot teachers aid $

If you’ve been using others for sex, you’re the one about to get fucked $$$*

If you’ve talked about the Epstein list more than your own “sex list” than we’re not going to get along $

If you care about the behavior of others more than your own
We are not going to get along $

Ego is the prize of the wise
Ego is the demise of those who despise 
Ego is the surprise of the daily disguise $

The hero defense attorney must be one conflicted character $

Write each night and you’ll be aight $$$

I don’t need much
Just a couple magic jars (& fridge)
So my meds and supps never run out $

First one is the always the hardest (emotionally) $$

A good warm up should actually be a lil spicy $$$

Bitch went missing 3 days ago on 7-5-12
Or 5-7-12 in Europe 
Hmm ok $

If you have to get on stage to claim your innocence then i know you’re guilty behind closed doors
Or a fucking dunce $$

I’d rather be a dunce than a bitch $$$

Sin is separation. The kind of division that takes place during the creative process.
It can be productive or destructive $$

Life is a series of calculated sin $$

Aww hope the kitty is coping well with all the craziness $

You suck if you don’t have a sense of humor $$$

Seriousness and silliness are the same coin
🪙 $$

That’s a cool emoji
They just get cooler each day now $

At least all my debt came from experiences and not materials $

All the $$ I spent out eating with others was just my tuition for clown college $

I used to shame myself about falling into debt
But then I autopsied the actual how & what
And i saw a young man trying to value the right things in the right order in a world going crazier by the day
And half of what i “wasted” was an attempt to alleviate the pain 
The other half was invested in shared experiences or reasonable expenses 
Considering the lack of intellectual guidance but the strange but strong emotional guidance, it’s not like I knew better and wanted to do wrong. I Just made the decision with the info I had at the time $

You can’t deceive everyone at the same time
Only a couple fools $$

My only hope is that there are secretly super smart people running shit
My only real belief is that tbh $

Thinkin bout how italics are just letters in motion $$

Probably gonna be the next thing I overdo $

Well we can live to lift and write another day
Scrounged up a lil cash to cover the bills and some food for a few weeks hopefully $

Can’t wait to breeze thru my stash like I breeze thru everything else in life $

I said I’d keep it real- hell or high water $

Can’t wait to miss every important detail by talking too much $$

Story of my life will be story of my memories 
All out of order and scrambled $$

Ider what movie is playing
I can’t focus on shit at the end of the day $

No doubt I’d have gone mad (sooner) if I didn’t write all the time $

Everyone writes all the time
It’s just to random people about random things usually using words the user hopes to never see/ hear again $$

Actually I need to reiterate that-
Most people would hate nothing more than seeing and hearing themselves (when they were not prepared for it) $$$

Might need to throw on a good prison show to really set the mood 
They always make me sleepy $

Confession hour
Prison shows and “my 600lb life” are oddly comforting $

This movie has Kevin spacey yelling at 7th graders ? $

Practicing writing difficult responses is the writing equivalent of strength training $$$

Spiritual “Communication practice” would look a lot like our current reality $$$

Damn my guard still hasn’t come down $

Most people are trapped with their guard always on
And it’s not fully their fault
They may be in a traumatic situation in which it gets triggered unconsciously 
Once it’s unconscious, it becomes freakishly difficult to observe and address 
Hence the whole concept of emotional suffering $

I am more blitzed than the 07’ patriots in the Super Bowl if ya know what I’m sayin $

If you’re reading this…
Peek a boo 👻 $

Fuckin spooky season frfr now $

It’s nearly the 14 year anniversary of when my 3rd ever girlfriend committed suicide (she was 16, I was 17)
Worst day ever $

3 days later I split my face open skateboarding (the scar under my left eye)
I had to go from the emergency room directly to her wake at the funeral home 
I walked in- my face literally completely bloodied with my arm in a sling
Half stoned from the Vicodin 
In complete shock
Her uncle forces me into the viewing room to see her body 
(Still have mental images of how beautiful she looked)
Anywho, after downloading my (U.N.)healthy trauma for the season, I ran out and cried by the wheel of my moms van 
Shout out to the homie who went with me that night 
Shit haven’t heard or see from him since that night just about…
If you’re reading this somehow bro- civics class was so much better with you in it $

lol yep I’m now lost af in this movie $

Nbd tho- I’m beginning to loosen up $

So time to find that prison show we were talking about haha $

 things that bring me weird comfort 
- Ancient anything
- Egypt
- Ancient Greece
- Roman Empire
- Pirates
- Revolutionary bros
- Civil war bros
- WW1
- WW2
- Prison shows
- Commercial gyms (modern battlefield obv)
Definitely nothing to read into there…$

Happy 9:08pm lol $

I lost track of the time back when Covid kicked off $

Ain’t nothing been the same since lol $

Any container with uncomfortable inhabitants can be considered a prison 
No matter the landscaping $$$

People would be more humble if they realized how much shit they have inside them at any given moment $$

Not many People actually hate others
Most hate themselves and are too scared to do anything about it so they just take it out on others $$$

People are so afraid of failing that most would just never try (so they can’t fail) $$

I’ll say it again
You can’t fail if you don’t quit
But sadly you can’t fail if you don’t try either… $$$

I made the best Mac and cheese earlier brother $

These YouTube docs ain’t as good as the msnbc classics
That’s all that’s msnbc is good for tho…. $

Can’t wait to take a day off
(I’m sure I’ll be itching to work again within 12 hrs lol) $

Your struggle isn’t all about you
Half of it is for/ because of those around you $$

Eternity is no joke
But seems like one to the easily intimidated $$$

We all have a role to play 
We just gotta play it $$

Okay 24hrs of nothin but mac and cheese and I feel inflamed and puffy 
My feet are kind of burning or highly pressurized 
And reddish $

So now the pendulum swings back to the eggs 🥚 $

Gonna chill mad hard tomorrow
Or try to $

I have to before I drive everyone else crazy haha
Need to upgrade the content machine (noggin 🧠 ) $

I’m still restless but I think that’s from diet $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-7-25

Good morning world 
Happy 1:23am $

I understand you are having a rough morning brother
Have you tried listening to some Creed yet? $

Just got to the movies
Settling in now $

Glad I can smoke in this theatre 
Be kinda lame otherwise $

If it sounds like this was written by somebody with mental issues, it’s because it was $$

My BCC isn’t high enough to get out the chair yet
(Blood caffeine content) $

Watching “October Sky”
Already got “feelsy” vibes $

Coal mining in west Virgina with super young Jake ghen…
Ghenylen…
*pauses ghallenhyall 
Omg
Ghelllenhall 
I ain’t googling it- give up 😂😂😂 $

“ so you go out and you steal the unborn babies each day just to eat them?”
*closing door to chicken coop
“ I wouldn’t put it like that but yeah” $$

More people would believe in magic if they realized how moldy everything was and how healthy they really are $$$

The punchline being-
The right training makes the test seem like a joke $$$

“Hold me now
In 6ft from edge and I’m thinkin
Maybe 6ft ain’t so far down”
*closing in for hug
lol you okay brother? $$

Lots of talk about a satellite $

Bro
Be warned bout the Mac 
Extra gassy ⛽️ $

I’m certain there is something that I’ll be the last to understand and the joke will be on me
But it seems like I’m 1st in a lot of lines $

I am living proof that you can invent your own writing style 
You just have to trick people into reading (more than once) $

lol guess they’re building a rocket over the summer with random materials 
Seems symbolic $

These days anyone can look up and see the same thing
They can also now look down at their phone $$

Smoking game: 1 hit every time an occult reference 
Drinking game: 1 shot every nazi reference $

If i can have the a high return rate, then idgaf about initial viewership amount $

“Ladies and gentlemen start your engines”
*shakes preworkout
**hits “play” on pandora $$

Everytime I think shits made up I remember how insane the ego is and how it can make you miss the most important things, right in front of you $$&

God help you if you follow more than 1 of my accounts 
Cuz I hate looking at myself as much as I do 😂😂 $

Shit I missed the rocket launch cuz I was typing haha $

Sometimes I worry that I was a real bad asshole in the last life cuz I’ve had to take hella shit from authority figures $

Playing Music videos in the background is the superior suburban strategy for waking up slowly but surely 🤙🏻 $$

My ex use to joke
“That man yearning for the mines”
I think I get it now $

Can’t wait till this becomes unconscious $

Ironic those that give you life will try to fuck with it in every possible way $$$

“I’m just a notch in your belt and you’re just a line in a Song”
-took me 31 yrs to get that frfr $

We’re all mining something for someone 
Just make it for gold and for yourself $$

Too clean is a bad thing too $$

Need a section called “writing workouts” $

Too clean is worse than too dirty cuz no way to stay clean if you’re working hard $$$

it’s hard to stay motivated at the end of the day sometimes $

People don’t really like those smarter than them (unless they love them too much)
People love those dumber than them (unless they hate them too much) $$

I don’t wanna motivate the world to work out once a day
I wanna motivate them to train four times a day $

Okay I need to switch gears and write more actual content lol $

To be fair- I’ve written a lot today $

Remembering I still have audio recordings of the time I sold 9k worth of windows to a gentleman living in a $600 shed
I mean literally 
I quit the next week $

Remembering my first 10k window sale I to a guy on the same exact street as the first home I sold $

Remembering the 20k roof I sold to a random on the north side on a random February (i think) afternoon $

Remembering the 10k window sale from the north side to the lady that made it clear “they weren’t deciding today” $

Remembering how nearly all my sales (the big ones) made it clear that they weren’t buying that day 
Especially not until they talked to their spouse $

New segment 
“Tales from an sneaky sales snake”
Or “you got sold”
Or “don’t be a sheep” $

Annndddd I’ve lost interest 
(Story of my life) $

Oh, I’ve got a good idea 
Let’s watch the movie about a series of unfortunate events at 1:57 AM $

DreamWorks think they slick like we don’t know what they’re talking about $

Paramount with all their stars $

Oh shit Nickelodeon‘s involved? $

Maybe this won’t be so bad $

This movie has a pretty strong opening about orphans and secret societies and shit 
But I’m pretty sleepy lol $

We made it 50m
*heads back to bed $

“History channel- do your thing ”
*starts episode on govt working with aliens
**falls asleep at record speed $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-8-25

Wish there was a way to perform without having to perform 🤔
*remembers YouTube 😁 $

Hard to take an off day when your always on (point) $$

A rope is not enough to hang yourself
You need a sturdy beam
You need a not so sturdy chair 
You need a series of unfortunate events 
& You need to know the right knot to tie $

A rope is just a cable without a condom $$

Travel & train = heaven $$$

I’m sure my ancestors used to strap up before going on a hunt 
Now I do it before door dashing in sketchy neighborhoods 
Modern day warfare $

Don’t be surprised if you bounce off rock bottom a few times $$

The Friday night 4 piece supreme combo Skyrim binges with the boys hit different after a long week of working at McDonald’s $

Hot take but paying off debt is more fun than creating it $$

Speeding to the light just makes you look stupid $$$

When possible, take the middle lane $

The Glock is riding shotgun today lol $$

Love the turn lanes that give you options $

Karma hits harder than any drug $$$

Take advantage of the nice but lazy people $

Hard work will spare you from BS
Cuz you’ll recognize it from far away $$

I think there are limited spaces available (spiritually) on this planet (bodies)
So there’s a line to reincarnate
But first, you need to go thru a life review 
Your essence (spirit) essentially “energy scarred” 
this is Immediately followed by amnesia (as to limit interference with intellectual growth)
This restores a level of fairness and altruism $

So Ghosts are loitering in limbo likely because they don’t want to move on
Knowing the next step of the process is horrifying $

If the filter breaks, then more energy pours thru
If the ego is the filter, then it’s selecting which energy to allow in
If the ego is hijacked, then it’s going to limit as much energy as possible $

The ego will create or destroy the resources it thinks it needs $$

Destruction is much quicker than construction $$

Construction will always triumph over destruction $$

I have officially become the Cookie Monster 
Living in a trash can
Scaring kids (unintentionally)
Binge eating cookies on sight 
Surfing waves of regret $

lol I’m seriously binge eating cookies 🍪 
HELP $

or don’t
Ur loss
(As I have the cookies) 🍪 $

Mfer these are dank
And just the right ingredients for a PR $

With the right technique, you can alchemize any resistance $$

Your starting and stopping position determines the best technique $$

We all have techniques that we like more than others 
The key is balancing our favorites with the ones that are the most beneficial $

My cat seems to have a lot more fun, stalking pray when he thinks he’s hidden from it 
He prefers to jump out and surprise it $

dangle the carrot just outside the cave and let nature do her thing $$

ADHD is a real thing
But it’s causes are as questionable as its treatments $$$

The more specific the job, the more room for fuckery outside of work $$

The more dynamic the role, the less room for fuckery off the clock $$

Bio swap: $

🏋️ Failing for Fun 💪🏻
        🔥💨🌎🌊
❤️ Every Movement Matters ♠️
                    🏋️💪🏻🎒
Push ➡️🏋️⬅️ Pull
         ❤️Fun♠️
 🧢 Better in person 🕶️
             🃏❤️🃏

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-9-25

I’m clocking in at 60 eggs over 72hrs $

Good morning world $

I think I’ve set a new record recently with how many movies I’ve half watched $

Watching “Casino Jack”
Which I’ve already half watched
I was just writing so much the first time that I don’t remember shit ironically 
Cept bits and pieces $

Not to brag but I spelled pieces correctly the first try $

A known challenge is not even in the same universe of difficulty as an unknown challenge $$

Broke is not broken $$$

Poor, poor, poor
Pour me another $$

The 4 phases of life
- teaching
- Training
- Testing 
- Throwing it away $$


I’ve logged 2,160 calories from cookies within the last 24 hrs $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-10-25

14 years ago was the worst day of my life 
Today will be the best $

Before we nuke another country,
Can we atleast TRY to spike their water supply with psilocybin first… $

 Waiting on some Dash
Lol while I was typing that last line, I got an order to go to McDonald’s 
It was a $3.25 total and for about 2 1/2 miles worth of drive 
Apparently the order was already picked up or was never placed 
No employee, you could help me figure it out 
So I was quickly reminded why this is not going to a viable option $

Guess it’s a good day as any to watch shutter Island again $

The first time I ever saw this movie, I was in a theater in the mall and was making out with some random girl from Facebook $

The second time was when I had snuck a ritilian patch and was chewing it at noon on a Wednesday. 
I was three weeks into a rehab $

The last time I saw it was a couple years ago 
And it made a lot more sense $

Plan for the day 
Get super baked 
Watch movies
Eat a big ass bowl of oatmeal
Destroy chest 
Watch more movies 
And reading and writing throughout $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-11-25

*reactivates Netflix
**loads fresh bong
Oh, it’s On
It’s so on $

What you do today will appreciate in value or by degree of separation 
Up to you $$

Everyone has mastered some kind of technique 
Usually without even realizing it $$

(reasonable) Limitless self expression $

We all grow our hair out at some point 
Some just look better with short hair $

Hours with Netflix reactivated: 5
Half watched TV series: 5 $

*starts Black Mirror S7E1 $

Don’t be too nice to him, he gets “starey” $

It takes years to be able to distinguish water weight from body fat with the naked eye 👁️ $$

Woah 👁️.👁️
lol new face $

Action reflects belief $$

Remembering the recurring dream of being back at RV… $

You can either artificially inflate your defensive health bar with medication 
Or master your defensive technique with meditation $$

The worst fate is doing nothing 
But not by your choice $$

Loving and losing is more painful than never loving but that also makes it more meaningful $$

Usually only delicate things require decoration $$

Dusting off the old Js in the middle of the October night 
Talk about nostalgia $

Taste is just being touched on the inside $$

So we’re clear
Feeling yourself is not the same as touching yourself $$

One is moving shit
Other is moving against shit $$

Walking down memory lane in my fear 4s $

Black is not the absence of color 
It’s a compilation $$

Black is the most dominant color $$

This next one is called
Tales from the dark side $$

Need a lil more ego in my headphones today $$

Clothes only make a man if the man is already wack af $$

Otherwise, man always makes the clothes $$$

Remembering the tinder date from late December 2020
God what a nightmare $

A lot of yall have never been held prisoner in an environment where “booty juice” was a real threat $$$

“Booty juice” is human tranquilization 
Literally- a shot in the butt that puts you to sleep for hours
Given to resisting patients 
Ngl- most of the time tho the patient had it coming $

Remembering “the village”
God I hope there were hidden cameras $

This Kratom buzz is just delightful 
So perfect for a slippery Sunday $

“Huggers” make me nervous
Even tho I’m techn one of them $

Solitude from sticking to your principles is fun and peaceful 
Solitude from selling out is hell $$$

Always be suspicious of someone who is trying to get you to like them
And remain suspicious of them- probably forever $$

Those who actually change leave little room for doubt due to the undeniable nature of their decision making. $$

The truth is a feeling more than it’s a thought $$

Lies are only triggering if you believe them $$

Tempting is as ethical as manipulation can get $$$

Too busy thinking and you won’t be able to listen $$

Listening is hearing raised to the 2nd degree understanding is raised to the 3rd $$

Give your body a specific part to repair before it decides to destroy itself $$

The body must go thru the cycle of damage and repartition to stay balanced 
If the body doesn’t have a foreign threat to work against, it’ll create one for itself (autoimmune anything) $$

Just about every problem ever was born out of inability to properly interpret emotions 
Either yours or theirs $$

Medical sales = greatest conflict of interest of all time
And don’t pretend the sales reps are moral agents $$

On this episode of black mirror… $

Homie enrolls his wife in a program to have part of her brain removed & uploaded to the cloud (with a chuck replaced as a receiver)
The surgery is free because they have to subscribe to have access to the could for $300 monthly $

You’d think For some,
The worst thing you could possible do is to take a right hand turn slightly too slow
Or merge in the left lane lazily $

Remember how many people are losing their shit in traffic right now
And suddenly everything gets funnier $

Goal for the day: Put the I in funner $$

Some people should be afraid of death because it’s not going to go well for them afterwards $$$

You can rid yourself of your fear of death whenever you are ready to humble yourself enough to build your faith $$$

Building faith requires ego death by 10,000 cuts $$$

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-12-25

*wakes at 1:30 am
It’s here
It’s finally here
10.13 $

W.e that means lol $

Black Mirror is such a good show $

Even better with weed $

Human bodies are like mini bio-spirit cop machines $

Rhettconning has a real “gaslighting” feeling to it $

Part of the intro ceremony is being gaslight until the brink of insanity $*

Understand that you are the dot and not the eye 
But you are also the eye and not the dot
So good luck squaring that circle ⭕️ $

Better to think about years in groups of 2 $

Shout out to all the nerds who fucking hated school most of the time too $*

Remembering when I was finally excited to go to school
I was a junior 
Lifeguard 
just got my license
Was dating the hottest girl in school
Big friend circle
A studded belt & New pair of team flight Js

And was functionally expelled within 7 days of the new school year 😂😂😂
I was legit too cool for school $*

Can’t wait to expand on that experience lol $

There’s a reason why I look at it as
“Hearing thoughts” $

Could be a ghosty boy (or girl) whispering the answers in my ear  
Could be a ghosty audience judging my ghosty listening ability
Could be a whole panel judging whether or not I’m taking credit for the ideas
So that’s why I cite my sources best I can $

Those controlled by their biology will never fully grasp their spirituality $*

Music sets 80% of the mood $

If anything- I’m a master of mediocrity 
Splitting the difference under any and all circumstances $*

Life does not have an actual delete button
But it does have a “move to trash” option $*

Ironic that the ADD kid who wouldn’t take notes in class would be writing all this shit lol $*

Words are the most precise 
Therefore the most misunderstood $

Like intellectual sniping,
Most shots by the untrained will miss $

Symbols are far more functional
The “movement” form of communication 
As long as the message gets where it needs to go, you maintain freedom in interpretation $

Happy 3:13am $

Gotta love each moment like it’ll last forever $*

Living like it’s your last is too easy
Living like it’ll be your responsibility forever is challenging (therefore meaningful) $*

Debating on eating or not $

I’m thinking if I add fruit to the oatmeal 
I may finally achieve culinary immortality $*

Happy 3:33am $

Old clothes can feel more fresh than new clothes $$*

Love the micro ego rush that comes from new shoes $*

When following your heart
You can’t go wrong, you can only get better $$$*

Dudes be like
“But you still micro cheated 3inches on the 2nd rep”
I am “dudes” $*

When pausing After your pitch,
A no is much faster than a yes
So the longer they think- the better $*

Sales taught me an easy yes is always worse than a difficult one $$$*

Hammocks are naturally resistant towards resistance $$$*

Hard to be stressed when your swinging $$$*

Gotta do it precisely because you don’t want to $$$*

Gotta do it precisely because you do want to $$$

Gotta learn the difference slowly but surely $

Better to be a freak than weak $$*

My first drug of choice was attention $$$*

Anyone who doesn’t believe that size is irrelevant has obv never encountered LSD $$$*

Egos like mine don’t play well with others sometimes (on the inside at least) $$$*

Remembering doing pull ups on a low hanging branch on the trail with the pack after a long day of hills ❤️ $*

The single greatest illness is the belief that you have one $$$*

There must be emotional parasites 🦠 
Leeches that drain energy from the egoic $$*

Only the wisest understand the point of something before or during it happens $$$*

Whatever I do, I’m just trying to make sure my old alter work ego stays dead $*

If there’s a difference then there is a reason for the difference $$$*

All particles must be accounted for somehow someway $$

Failure comes in many shapes and sizes 
But the most common is when we decide to stop 
It is rare to push until we have undeniably exhausted everything that we have
But there are a few experiences worth that level of meaning than a true test of endurance. $$

We are always negotiating with the governor within our brain
That part of the ego that says that we have done enough
That we can stop or that we can’t do anymore without consequence 
The governor is the most notorious liar 
He is a prison warden drunk with his own power
The governor cannot be reasoned with gently 
Now there are many techniques to submit the governor and convince it to keep moving 
But at a certain point The only thing that part of the mind mind will listen to is its spirit daddy.
And well spirit daddy, gonna run that motherfucker into the ground 

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-13-25

Nothing like some berry oatmeal to jumpstart the day
*falls back asleep due to carb coma $*

The best news you could ever receive:
today will be the worst day of the rest of your life $$$*

The real reason I was fired from RV was because I was leaving early to go to the gym 😂😂😂 $$$*

Somebody’s gotta make the decision 
And nothing scares some more than decision making $$$*

Things don’t actually exist 
Just different levels of constructs $$*

My Cat is actively destroying my charger rn as I type lol $$

If you are selling anything as “fit” then you deserve to burn 🔥 $$*

Caffeine is the real liquid courage $$$*

Eventually that feeling of missing out goes away 
But not without a fight $$$*

Comfort is comforting after all $$

lol last door dash was on Faith Street
They asked for an extra sweet & sour sauce $

Not sure how many orders I owed but I hope I’ve satisfied them now $

Walking down memory lane at the moment 
The spot where I ate asphalt at 30 mph before going to my g-friends wake $*

If I can learn how to slow it down despite my ADHD then anyone can $*

It takes more than energy to frown instead of smile
But it takes zero energy to maintain a solid RBF $$$*

Must have happened around 2-3 in afternoon $

Few are “bad”
Most are “distracted” $$*

Shootin the shit (spiritually) $

If talent survives the ass beating,
then it becomes dangerous $$$*

Silent threats are the most deadly because they’re not announcing their plan beforehand
So most of it is on you for not paying attention well enough $$

As the occupant of one tiny coldasac,
I find it beneficial to check out the other tiny sacs in my hood $$$*

Some days when the lines be lining up
I have to take my phone back out the moment I put it away
The Modern day “drawing” (except it’s writing) $

Modern day dueling is just who can pull out their phone and record faster $$*

Smile & wave as often as you can
So when assholes do their life review, it’s like spiritually gloating $$$*

If there’s a way to spiritually brag- ima develop into it’s ideal image one day at a time better than anyone else $$$*

The real Spiritual Olympics is just illuminating the many ways people are monsters to each other $$$*

Better to get the Gist than to worry about getting everything right $$$*

Gonna get high enough to teach Kites a thing or two $$*

Teaching
Training
Testing

Random $

Easy to give credit to spirit for the ideas that randomly come up
But what about the defensive aspect of thwarting off BS?
Under appreciated for sure $$*

lol I think my neighbor just got DoorDash $

GDamn I’m good with the Mac (& cheese) 🫕 🧀 $$*

Emojis are only going to get better ❤️‍🩹 
Learn how to wield them responsibly $$$*

I feel like the years 2012 thru yesterday didn’t actually happen 
Just me? $$*

More like 
Theory of relative BS and how space is functionally fake 
*ashes bowl $$*

That one was for my friends with the tin foil wizard hats 🎩 $$

Dudes be like 
“Using women for self realization is so douchey”
*opens incognito browser $$$*

“Why me” is just wining split into two sets $$*

That last line was fun to read and write ✍️ $

Ok I’m already trying too hard 😅 $

Didn’t last long $

Dudes be like
“That’s what she said”
….. $

Yes you guessed it
I’m talking during a movie again
Sorry- writing ✍️ $

Definitely not talking to myself 
That’s just voice to text
Silly voices…. $

Art doesn’t have to make sense if it makes dollars
But then that’s actually just a product modeled after the real art $*

What a Great warm up bowl 🥣 $

What a Great working bowl 🥣 $

What a great victory bowl 🥣 $

Whatever background movie I got going is way to artsy
And that’s coming from the guy pour painting iron weights $

Leave it to Christian Bale to star in a movie bout a womanizing asshat $

Boredom sex shouldn’t count towards your body count cuz you’re really just fucking yourself in the long run $$$*

Boredom sex isn’t sex
It’s just sad $$*

14 years ago (tomorrow technq) I boarded a plane to LA (worst day ever)
Tomorrow, I board another (best day ever) $$

A day can be the best and you not appreciate it until after the fact $$$

The “Meaning Man” is a super hero that time travels by placing hidden secrets and messages in your memories for your future self to help you alchemize your memories 
(lol gotta edit that one) $$

Nearly egg thirty 🕰️ $

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-14-25

Happy A + B = C day 
Only 12 in the year! $

Next is 11-14-25
Then 12 - 13 - 25 $

deadass
I looked my GED instructor in the eyes and said I want to be a motivational speaker 🔈 $$*

Burning off energy requires a lot of work 
Muscle is an excellent reservoir for energy $

“When they see us”
I remember it being pretty good
We shall see if it passes the test of time $

After a while
You know it’s real when it doesn’t feel like it $*

Wonder what it would have been like to be a true stoop kid
I’m a true suburban kid, wonder if that’ll make it easier or harder $

Remember how one day can (& will) change the course of your entire life 
Cuz spirit guardians don’t forget $$$*

When wylin in the park goes wrong… $

Gotta be careful at the park after dark $$*

Many of yall have never had to run from the cops and it shows $$$*

I’ve rolled with enough cops to know they ain’t the emotional Trail Blazers they want us to think they are $$$*

A white bitch who thinks she knows everything is about as dangerous as it gets $$*

Many of yall act like you believe you’re never going to have to relive your selfish moments 
and it shows $$$*

The key takeaway being-
If they haven’t suffered their own ego death- they’ll suffer you until you are both dead $$$

There are thousands of
- maybe millions of - 
actual people who derive pleasure when they observe the suffering of others. 
these fuckers are the definition of evil.
But it is righteous to delight in the elimination of evil
Therefore it is righteous af to derive pleasure from the ignorance of evil by trolling the fuck out of it $$

I only act immortal cuz that’s how good I feel $$$*

Why is it feel and not feal 
….
*loads bowl 🥣 $$$*

When at an emotional impasse with someone, 
Be the bigger person and subjugate your trauma to secondary $$$*

You have every right to laugh in the face of the wicked
Especially when they try to bring you down $$$*

A Gentleman never allows fear to over generalize $$$*

Happy 2:22am to everyone except the bitches that set up these kids $$$

lol that detective look like Pablo Escobar
And he’s acting like him too
Which is to say he’s kinda like a teddy bear 🧸 $

Any adult who is afraid of a child is clearly not an actual adult
but an emotional man-child of the most spoiled variety $$$*

Earnestly seeking to be a better person daily is as Devine as it gets $$$*

Whoever said writing is boring just never had good prompts 
OR a method of dealing with built up emotions lol $$$*

I love most of the big team sports 
But if you’re going to emotionally invest in a sport that has no direct bearing on your life , 
I feel like it’s better to support the solo athlete over big teams as that support goes much further in that athletes world than another anonymous obnoxious patron $

Most of yall have never lost your freedom (even briefly) and it shows $$$*

Most don’t realize they are actually free because they are prisoners of their own emotions $$$*

This is the spiritual support hour apparently (8pm) $$

For 9.3yrs of my life, between 6-9pm I was likely doing something recovery related (if I wasn’t selling something) $

We see what we want to see
We want what we think is best
We think the best we can with the info 
available at the time

The info available is often sketch $$$

Therefore when considering what it is we want, it’s best to start with the acknowledgment that the facts are at best a bit sketchy $$

Word play matters more than foreplay $$$

Number play matters more than word play $$$

Today’s notes gonna be weird af 😂😂😂 $

The secret is simple 
It’s to have actually done the work beforehand $$$*

Prisoners are usually more muscle than movement lol $$$*

Most prisons don’t have barbed wire
They have white picket fences $$$*

If you don’t understand how someone could give a false confession then consider yourself lucky for never being truly gaslight before $$$*

Imagine your deepest darkest secrets being know by everyone 
Imagine the elimination of restraints and being overwhelmed by the consequences of your actions instantaneously 
That’s the state the sheep call- hell
That’s also the state the wise call heaven $$

The lower the IQ, the higher the user thinks it’s actually is $$$*

Gotta sprinkle in the spiritual seasoning slowly so it doesn’t sour $$$*

Humility is esoteric 
So its merits are measured in reverse $$$*

Things that actually help you in the long run almost always hurt like hell in the short run $$$*

The truth eliminates suffering 
Understanding is the application of truth $$*

Any good test is 2/3 concealed as the only thing you can actually test is your reaction to the unknown $$*

It’s all fun and games until it gets cold $$

Most won’t even look at the scoreboard even when the differential isn’t that staggering $$

Winners never really feel like it unless they feel too much like it $$$*

Athletes are often unaware of their attributes $

Athletics is the most unexplainable art $

You can’t teach movement in a book $$$*

You can teach anything else in a book except for movement $$

Athletics is the art with the most immediate and severe consequences $$$*

Be weary of those quick to distinguish themselves verbally $$$*

Be mindful of those quick to distinguish themselves by their actions $$$*

That 2nd bowl was a lil more humble than the first 🥣 $$$

Sin is separation and division $$

If you spend more energy on destruction then don’t be surprised when youve ruined everything by the end $$$*

Remember-
Only Monsters need to wear masks 🎭 $$$*

If you are not wearing a mask then you are already in the top 1% $$$*

Lets use simply and generous numbers
50% don’t train and don’t want to
25% train 1x weekly
10% train 3x weekly consistently 
1% have trained 3+ years consistently 
.01% have trained 6+ yrs consistently 
So take a moment and remember the relative difficulty of your efforts $$$*

Those looking for a way to get offended deserve the offense they perceive $$$*

I wanna get sleepy soon so I can rest and start again fresh $

You observe what you created 
Physically 
Mentally
Spiritually $

Redefining acronyms , one entry at a time $$

Can’t wait to lift in a few hours ❤️ $

Happy 3:26am
*lighter flicks $

Me- “Bout time to hit the hay”
Hay- “WTF” $

“Turn it over”
Great advice in church
Bad advice in football $$$*

I’m not saying that I’m going to
But I could totally smash another bowl rn 🥣 $

All bricks are laid one at a time
Just at different speeds with different teams $$$*

Justice is just emotional ice 🧊 $$*

If you have to request a fair fight from your opponent then just know that it will not be one $$$*

I’ve seen the inside of many courtrooms 
But only one courthouse $

I’ve been to the jail on several occasions (3)
All for different purposes ironically $

I’ve been to the psych ward twice
First as a patient in Dec 2011
Second as a visitor in Nov 2015 $

I’ve been to my “rehab” twice
Once as a patient in 2011
Second as a desperado in 2021 $

Dreams don’t work unless you do
Which is why I gladly trade a few hours of the pillow for the pen 🖊️ $$$*

*loads victory bowl before bed🥣 $

I already do not agree with white people with dreeds
Can’t trust their decision making $$$*

It ain’t that hard to say sorry
I’m sorry but It’s really not $$$*

DJ
More ego plz $

Forcing someone to watch something under false pretenses is evil $$$*

You haven’t mastered shit until you can do it switch $$$*

Time for a Mac & Cheese break $

The fork is the superior instrument for the Mac $$$

Push day thots
- incline b
- Dips
- SNG arm lm press
- Lat raises 
- Ovh ext
- Push ups 
- Hi Throws
- Kickbacks
- M hold $

Only the uneducated or impatient skip warm ups
Or those who hate progress and desire injury $$

1. Ain’t no other way
2. Trust the process
3. Get started 
4. Write it out
5. Talk it out
6. Be honest
7. Be willing 
8. Get ready to make it right
9. Grow up time 
10. Keep your word
11. Update / upgrade
12. Give it away to keep it $$$*

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-15-25

If your pitch is that “it saves you money”
Then you don’t have a pitch $$$*

A false win is when your competition suffers therefore elevating your position $$$*

Oh boy 
Got Triggered early today $

“Do this to fight heart disease”
*Runs down street ridiculously $$*

This is the anti pogo stick
It’s a stick $*

I’ve hit just about every red light
But they all turn green eventually 
And I just do push ups while I wait $*

Sales Snakes make me sick
This is coming from the guy who once had a team called the “cash cobras” $

Wow just remembered my old banner
The Cash Cartel
Was a giant reaper holding the AT&T globe haha
I miss that banner… $

Never forget how many people are killing themselves right now just to wear a different T-shirt
Or to get a compliment from the barista who never notices them $$$*

The right meal & tv show combo is a drug
Or atleast is as mind and mood altering as one $$*

Timing is the most sophisticated variable 
And the most magical $$$

The joke is that 80% of what I have learned as a relates to training techniques has involved attention seeking form hot girls $

If I’m king of anything it the amount of of unnecessary shit I have done in the gym $$$*

How many minutes have I spent waiting on some random shit to open or to begin 🤔 $

How much time have I “killed” ? $

Love this time of year when all the leaves fall down and the trees show us what’s underneath $

Stationary for too long is stagnation $$$

Posted up at the at the teeter 
overlooking the grid of townhomes $

I think I’ve sold probably 7 or 8 townhomes 
Nothing special $

Most agents haven’t even been around long enough to sell the home they helped buy $*

Nm, just Waiting on the Weed man
(But this time it’s a super sweet early 40s woman who opens the feminine af Cannabis Boutique near my house) $

3 min and I’m getting off the DD clock and back on my own $

lol fuck it 
Hoping off now $

No matter what
 I can’t forget about the time I went to the martial arts place near my house 
as a 205 pound power lifter and 
I was surrounded by nothing but children 
And a sleezy instructor who had the audacity to still pitch me a package $*

“Okay bitch you are officially on my shit list”
Me to the adorable old lady driving reasonably af & obeying all the traffic laws $*

People whip into parking spaces much more confidently when they think nobody is in the car $

People get humbled real quick when they realize someone else has been watching them $*

Those who abuse their power do so only because they don’t believe in anything more powerful than themselves $*

Which makes them the easiest of fools to manipulate $$$

Ima laugh if that sweet old lady I was getting agro with is going to the Pot shop like I am 😂😂😂 
She got the olive green Subaru outback so never know 😂😂 $

Does else’s water bottle love to fly across their dash all dramatic or just mine? $

No doubt about it at this point 
I was definitely a smart but self righteous asshole in my last life
Especially to women
It’s the Only explanation for the sheer amount of service I’ve had to perform in this life to compensate $

Shit has just been too weird to be unexplainable… $

Update- the lady went into the hair salon instead 
Lame
But better than the tobacco shop I suppose $

Love key the Hemp store loves open a few min late $

Like I’m not trying to hover but it’s now 10:01 and it’s seemingly like it’s time to panic $

The only way to know what’s in is to rule what’s out $

Okay now it’s 10:02 and I’m starting to worry $

One day, ima make the most FUNctional Gym & Med club the world has ever seen $

*dials cops
“Uh yes, high
Y’all know the weed shop behind your headquarters is 3 min late to open? “ $

Im obv kidding around but this is kinda getting old 
& It’s a principle thing- I’ve already seen someone turn around and leave cuz they weren’t open yet $

Watch me get a bunch of free stuff again… $

Now 7min late… and the joke is quickly going stale… $

There’s gotta be a good reason 
Which would make me a dick but what else is new lol $

10:12am
She’s here haha
And seems okay but now I gotta wait a few more min to not crowd her 
Ya know 
Make it seem less desperate 
Like I haven’t been waiting 36 min lol 😂 $

Let’s see where the polo boys in the big truck are going in 
(Smoke shop)
But another woman just went into the Hemp shop so that’s nearly my que $

Listening to lady complain about her pain
Arthritis and autoimmune 
She is morbidly obese 
Can barely walk
Talking about various medical studies and trials
Talking about how she’s drug tested monthly (so likely govt employee)
The saddest part is she’s speaking as a victim and sounds dependent on others fixing her
I really hope this is just another case of me misjudging cuz it’s heartbreaking $

Woe to those who have yet to learn that misery loves company
Cause there’s only one way to learn that lesson and it sucks ass $$$*

Focus on the things that don’t get old and you’ll stay young forever $$$*

I’m looking like a cardinal 
With my red cut and flannel and hair and attitude $

Go Get some sun on them cheeks and shine for the weak $*

Takin a lil ten-r walk before I bust out some pages $

Man what a time to be alive $

Really digging the red on red actually $

Modeling is more selection that presentation $

Wonder how these lines are gonna age
Probably strangely $

Garbage trucks are the suburban cookie monsters $

And sound like monsters from far away $

As a kid
The worst thing that could happen to you is you get spotted by the older kids school bus 
Cuz they’d roast tf out of you $*

Gonna have to do some sprints in a bit $

Im the neighborhood quarterback
Gotta stay ready $

“It’s gotta be cold enough by now”
*burns tongue 
“Fuck that’s good coffee” $*

Happy 2:51pm
All moments are special 
Never forget $

Keep training till my legs are a quarter as fast as my attention span $$$*

*loads bowl 🥣 $

Gotta point my thot receiver in another direction for a bit
Bbl $

Found in an old note:
When I was 12 I began feeling pretty shitty
Middle school was not “chill”
My friends were crazy af and we ….

I was first given amphetamines 

I was 12 The first time I got into legal trouble
I was 14 the first time I smoked weed
I was 14 the first time I drank 
I was 14 when I began taking amphetimines daily unknowingly (my friends adhd meds)
I was 15 when I was prescribed my first ssri 
I was 15 when I was prescribed amphetamines by my primary care 
I was 15 when I was charged multiple times for maraijuana related paraphernalia 
I was 15 when I began having my first major depressive episodes 
I was 15 when I had began doing pills as often as I could 
I was 15 when my grandmother died and my family fell apart 
I was 15 the first time I had my heart broken
I was 16 when I was first taken to jail (for a roach)
I was 16 when I was kick out of public high school for an accidental pocket knife and 3 grams of weed
I was 16 the first time a close friend died
I was 16 the second time my heart was broken by a close friend 
I was 16 when all my friendships changed 
I was 16 the first time I would participate in theft, drug dealing and burglaries 
At 16 I would have my first job
At 16 I would lose my first job 
At 16 my dad moved out,
By 17 I had lost count of the psych meds
By 17 I had 5 criminal charges all relating to marijuana 
At 17 I had my heart broken a 3 rd time
More painful than anything before 
By 17 I could no longer get through each day 
I was 17 the first time I was institutionalized 
I was 17 when I first changed my life
I was 17 when I quit abusing drugs
I was 17 when I received my GED
I was 17 when I began exercising 

I was 18 when I began my second job (McDonald’s)
I was 18 when I celebrated 1 year clean and sober
I was 18 when I met my late best friend
I was 18 when I joined my first gym (planet fitness)
I was 18 when I went back to college 
I was 18 when I got my first tattoo

I was 19 when I would start my first business 
Grey market sneakers lol 
I was 19 when I would loose count of my tattoos 
I was 19 when I celebrated 2 years clean

I was 20 when I began my first “big boy job” $

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-16-25

*clears throat
“Yea that’ll send em a message”
-my pancreas & insulin 
“THATS A LOT OF OATMEAL BRO FUCK” $

Watching stranger things 
(there’s an episode On the Tv and Mirror) $

*Exhales
Lemmie just set the bowl 🥣 by the bong $

My feet squirming already haha $

If you remember, what’s wrong then you immediately remember what is right as well $$

Unfortunately, it is easier to recall pain than pleasure 
So sometimes it’s easier to recall a painful mistake to realign towards a pleasurable goal $$

Just ate seven more eggs 
Shit is getting a little crazy 
*lighter flick $

I can’t remember what I was supposed to remember $

I’ve gotten good and remembering to forget some things $

And other things I forget to remember $

do the movement portion in the next morning as active recovery
Then smash Hella carbs 
Then smash muscle $

Shit there go my feet
They may just want to go sleepys 
Or sprintys $

We gotta wait 6ish hrs for sprintys tho $

Bed time it is
Happy 2:30 am $

Seems I didn’t mean to match so seamlessly $

Remembering that right before she left
She hit her 10k sale
A goal that we worked towards together 
But only one of us sacrificed for it
Because she took the money and left anyway $

I Can’t blame her cuz I’m too busy thanking her $$$

Finishing up my Sun walk then bout to hit Back $

I say it’s Back day like it’s a muscle day
But it’s really a muscley movement day 
Fitting and functional $

We are all just models and actors for nature to watch $$$

Smile & wave is how I prefer to behave $

Memories of waiting on my best friend to come over for the weekend so we can terrorize the neighborhood 
And play video games
And the neighborhood football games
And the Friday night pizza $

Kinda excited to play Pizza Santa tonight $

Hahaha it kinda works $

My life A traumadey
A Tragic comedy $

Never forget the one window appointment that I had in the bag then the dude loses his shit last second and blew the sale $

Script

1. So back in the day
2. When I was selling roofs & windows and shit
3. I had this one appointment 
4. Now homie actually wanted siding
5. But Siding is hella expensive 
6. and so hard to close that we really don’t bother
7. But a lead is a lead so
8. I weasel my way from a siding sale to a window pitch
9. I probe and build good value
10. My Pitch was smooth as the slime I was peddling 
11. And way over PAR. (Iykyk)
12. And what do ya know- He takes the bait
13. A little too much of it actually. he was a lil too excited to now…
14. But anywho- I’m all fired up. Super stoked with myself and my sleezy superpower
15. we are finalizing the paperwork, And the dudes card gets declined for the 1% HOLD 
16. Without missing a beat, He Then goes on a huge tirade about how much money he’s got
17. Even starts showing me unsolicited old screenshots and shit.
18. He makes it’s so weird and awkward that I have to essentially run away.
19. So Instead of just saying no- he went along with everything cuz wanted me to believe he had it like that 😂😂😂

An Easy yes = an easy gfto there

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-17-25

If there is room to recover, then it’s not punishment that’s training $$

Happy 1:08 am $

Starting off all synchronized & shit $

I have great news everyone 
We’re stocked up on carbs $

Let’s do some calorie math real quick
We have 
strawberry preserves- 25x50= 1,250
Creamy peanut butter- 180x16 = 2,880
Scallop crackers- 70x 11 = 770
Italian sourdough loaf- 12x 120 = 1,440
Two things of tuna in oil- 2x 160 = 320
One tuna in water- 1x 160= 160
And medium size Texas Pete, hot sauce 0x72
Cals: 6,820
Cost: $15.52
CPC: .22 kCPC
EPIC $

Divded 1,500 per day
Lasts 4.5 days ish
$3.44 per day
(Excluding eggs lol $

Eggs pace at 15 min per day
$5.6 per 30 at the Lion 
So $2.6 for eggs daily
We looking at $6 a day for 2,500 cals and 150ish gs protein $

Loading up a bowl 🥣 $

“Spiderhead” 🎥 🍿 
Watching a movie bout test subjects on some kind of laughing drug
*lighter flick $

Laying bricks 🧱 is better than shooting them 🏀 $$

Another day
Another podcast I’ve slept through (2nd half) $

Technique speaks louder than words 
-I am most guilty of forgetting this $

lol oh gee I wonder that the MK Ultra trials were like… $

What’s first to develop in the womb is the slowest to build in the tomb $$$

A foundation is the first thing you want to build and the last thing you want to repair*** $$$

So far
This “drip” is prob just Molly haha $

You gotta have a good reason to be lighting more than 3 candles when alone $$$

My stomach actin a lil weird $

I needs some snacks in my life $

Those last two statements define my dieting lifestyle $

I hear a sleepy kitty 🐈‍⬛ 🥰 $

This guy just gaslights the fuck out of you in order to talk you into something sketchy
Sounds familiar… $

Ehh
Probably gonna go back to bed soon
Stomach being sketchy 😅 $

Um this movie just took a dark ass turn
They flooded her with bad chems
Giving her a bad trip
Then she kills herself
And now homie is feeling guilty cuz he’s tripping on some other kind of drug
And he just realized this is a trial for some pharmaceutical company $

Right before she snapped, her trip was identical to my summer addy detox…. $

The fastest pathway to peace usually involves pulling your head out of something tight and uncomfortable $$$*

Chillin at the CVS where my ex used to get her ADHD meds
Weird vibe lol $

Mint hill madness is this weekend 
Such memories
Mostly of being anxious in a park/ carnival setting but hey
That one day when I was 14 was pretty fun
It lead to my first make out sess $

It’d be so funny to watch future generations decode our slang and lingo 
Kinda like we analyze peeps from a few hundred years ago $

And then he said
“Bounce back on dat ass”
Which is just a euphemism for perseverance 
Amazing $

Might have 31$ by the time this is over in 7 min $

Oooo actually we broke $33 $

YEET $

Time for gas
Tuna/ crackers/ hot sauce
A Grammy gram
And a prayer for inspiration $

Sometimes you gotta split payments to split the difference $$

Idk how long this broke boy phase gonna last but it’s really fun actually 
When it’s not existentially terrifying $

All I know is that when Fred EagleSmith said he had water in the fuel, I felt that in my chest $

Tattoos signify those who were willing to deal with pain to look cool $$*

A lot of dudes don’t really like me because I keep raising the bar 
They prefer to keep it in the same position $

Move mass
Move against mass
Self $


MASS- STR - ULC $
- bb str 
- Bw str
Upper $
- floor press
- Power row
- Chin up
- M press 
- Dips
- Face pull
- Swing
- Dig
- Throw
- Slam
- Fall
- Catch

HYP- HYP - PPL $
- comp hyp
- ISO hyp

Self- END - FB $
- Fight/ fun end
- Run end

New columns $
- broken premises
- Sad but true
- Probably already said this
- Soap box pt XXX
- Told ya so
- For the record (official)
- Esoteric af
- Yea, no
- Would you rather
- So this one time
- Hate to say it
- Probably already said this 
- What they don’t want you to know 
- You’re not ____ until ____
- Words from a Wise guy 
- The Diary of Fuck Boy Supreme
- Art & Alchemy 
- Memories of the dark side 
- Tellin tales
- Trails, tails, & fails
- Lessons learned the hard way 
- Rules of the Game 
- Lipstick on a pig
- Quick lil pick me up
- List of lists
- Strong but stoned 
- Goes both ways 

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-18-25

You see all kinds of things door dashing $

People who work from home
People who clearly never leave home
Those who are struggling
Those who are celebrating
People who order often
People who order on special occasions $

Death is a gift to those who are ashamed of themselves $$*

Happy 1:33 am $

I get a more honest response from
“What don’t I want to do”
Than
“What do I want to do” $$*

Home is where you don’t need to unrack the rack $$*

I like to leave the weight on the bar so I can pick up where I left off $

Simply by looking the devil in the eye can you steal most of his power $$$*

Ngl
Writing on the phone as if I was texting is one of the most natural things to do 
Cuz I’ve been doing it under just about all circumstances since I was like 12yrs old 😂😂😂 $

True power requires the true humility. 
Otherwise, it’s just a performance 🎭 $$*

I keep forgetting that I made strength training into a card game
I gotta focus on that more haha $

You wanna see me triggered? $*
Start talking about “fitness experts” or anything with belly fat 
*roll footy
- Just saw an article about how 9 fitness experts agree why your not losing abdominal fat
- Thought I’d help yall by filtering out the BS
- It suggested these things-
- Ima say just do this ____ and be patient 

*ketchups eggs $*
Oh, that’s too good. Do not write down.
*gets phone from other room

Ironically, you can build a lot of muscle when running away from your problems $$$*

By publishing my notepad,
I’m really just asking to be institutionalized again … $*

It’s 2:09 on Sunday Am
Or Egg o’clock 🍳 $

It’s obv the moon likes to talk shit 🌚 $$*

Remembering how my ex was bloated one time and crying bout how she “looked like the moon emoji” $

Most people dont think anyone in their right mind can keep up writing the this amount of gibberish and they would be right
But jokes on you, I’ve been training for this $*

“Don’t let anyone help you ever”
“And don’t ever open up to anyone”
Ego: “Bet” $

Ima be the kinda of writer that you sneak out to read in the middle of the night
Cuz that’s when most of my shit was written 😂😂😂 $*

Hell isn’t the most painful 
Just the most meaningless (& boring) $$$*

I like lucky charm cereal 
You’d think the marshmallows would be the softest & sweetest but they hit the hardest $$

I have to do toast now… $

Better to Jelly toast after toasting.. 🥂 $$

Toasters toast toast to the best level of toastyness $$$

It’s Lower day
Which isn’t the smoothest to say but is the smoothest of the days $$

I refuse to let things cook for the entire time $

I’ll put an extra minute on the timer and still pull it out early 
It’s cooked the same but seems faster that way $*

MFG that was good toast $

LOL remembering how my last batch of Addy’s were engraved
 MFG EPIC
“My fucking God…” $*

Every third week 
I’ll buy a bunch of carbs and get all puffy for a few days
Is pretty funny actually $*

It is physically hard to not eat another piece of toast right now 
Very hard 
I’m just standing in the kitchen, staring at the toaster $*

Luckily, I learned a long time ago how to make things inconvenient enough for myself to serve as a functional deterrent in my daily life 
That way, I’m not constantly overcome by temptation $

I don’t like getting sticky fingers after jelly though $

Anything sticky is already a little icky $$$

I guess it’s time to start working my way back into the real world
Hanging out at coffee shops gyms and shit
Boy, it’s been a while $

If you haven’t gone through a summer of cutting everything out, then I highly recommend it $

Fuck I still want more toast 
Maybe the weed can defeat my wakefulness 
Which will defeat my carb craving
Or
The weed will increase the carb craving 
In which case - I will certainly cave
Which will increase the carb coma
Which will defeat my wakefulness $

So either way it’s a Weed - weed situation $$$

The kool aid man is an accurate metaphor for carb cravings $$$

Cuz that’s how carb cravings arrive and behave $$

2:32am
Shit- 2:33am
Niceee $

Gonna do a push functional movement sess for 1st lift ❤️🏋️🔥 $

Not sure what this emoji actually is but 〽️ it’s a M so 〽️❤️〽️ $

Kinda dig it ngl
Gonna sleep on it and see $

Victory hit
Think the weed is beating the wakefulness 
Beating the carb craving 
What a ride $

Star Wars just popped into my head
“Restore balance to the force”
Which was My motto when I was in the Force
(Ya know- the Sales force) $

Cleaning up the past
One delivery at a time haha $$

“Money aside, this is an excellent character-building opportunity”
-lame ass spirit guardian $$$*

Hate to be that guy but…
Pasta is not food
It is fuel
For the soul $$$*

Why there no soul emoji ? 
I Guess cuz that would just look like a regular human body 🤔 $$

I wonder how stoned my surveillance team is 💨 $

Can’t stand insecure weak ass wimpy boys cuz they remind me too much of me $$

Errrggg how dare you remind me of me and everything I regret even tho none of it is that shameful and we all regret silly things and the past isnt even real anyway and I digress cuz how dare you… $

If anything, at least I’m not trying that hard
If that’s not obvious 😂😂 $

I promise you- 
not trying = the more efficient trying $

Fear Fucks Flow. Fast $*

Muscle the wrong movement and you’re gonna have a bad time $$$*

I guess all things equal 
It’s better to cut the scene too early than too late 🎬 $$$*

I never understood those checker clippy things until I started filming the training library 
🎬 holy fuck it is impossible to keep up with the clips without something like that $

That’s not a bad intro emoji
Some emojis are deff outro only 🌚 $

I feel like this “bubbly” emoji can be perverted quickly 😶‍🌫️ $$$

SEE MY POINT $$$*

Me- “it’s best to suck some days to really emphasize the days you don’t”
*old manager: 🤦‍♂️ 
**old vacuum: 👀 $

hacking your significant others anything-
gross 🤮 $$$*

“I take those pills so I can be myself”
Yea, said that before…

Yikes… $

We’ve all been in holes we shouldn’t have been in $$$$$* lol

I Think it takes atleast 12 months to hit the romantic reset button 
Atleast…. $$

The greatest gift isn’t doing less, It’s fearing less $$$

If there are far fewer “wrong things” 
Then it’s a more effective and efficient strategy to understand destruction than to understand every possible positive outcome $$

It’s official 
*turns “freshly baked” sign on $

Gotta get to the bed without a kitchen detour…….$

8 is just a twisted 0 $

We high on sleep and low on caffeine at 9:27am $

I love my fear 4s cuz they remind me I’m scared of everything $

There’s a reason I chose the black heart that one day on the beach in Portugal… $

Might have to roll with the emo vibes $

Black always brings motivation 
Just the sketchy kind $

I really just want to lay around $

I don’t wanna save the world today but fuck it
Nothing better to do $

A true God has more power in his fingertip than a devil with his bank account $$$*

Sorry I can’t sit still
Them spirits be shaking me $$*

I know what you are thinking 
“Definitely do not wanna fuck with that guy” $*

I wouldn’t be afraid of me
I’d be afraid of those dudes beating the bags at crunch $*

Caught somewhere between being the best or the biggest asshole $$$

Works in process have less to work with than more completed works
So if we are building our planet, then it is limited compared to its builder $

Whatever spiritual rewards we receive are best delivered during sleep $$$

If a group of people has been trained to reason and believe in a particular order
Then is it telepathy when they arrive at the same conclusion?
Or just wisdom? $$

Once you been lifting for a few weeks you’ll realize that your body doesn’t listen to you just cuz you said so
You gotta bring that mfer into heel $$$*

Telepathy is just talking on the inside (intent draws the target) $$

Telepathy sounds cool, but I don’t think it’s gonna stop heart disease $$*

Anything that promotes sitting on the fucking couch is probably not the best $$$

But if you have no choice, then I took my hat to you for adapting to your circumstances $

For the rest of us, move your fucking ass! $$$

A functional intuition is better than a complex understanding $$$*

Do the first step of something as fast and often as you can $$$

The first step usually doesn’t require more than a truthful admission and honest commitment to the 2nd step $$

Tally so far

M&m
- Sun
- Mon 
- Tue 
- Wed
- Thur 

TRG
- Sun
- Mon
- Tue
- Wed 

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-19-25

If you wanna be in the top 1% then you can’t ignore the 1% details in your day to day life $$$*

Wisdom is knowledge in action $$$*

Most writers are alcoholics because they’re already addicted to their own thoughts $$

Wisdom is applied knowledge $$

We back at the CVS currently 
Kickin it
Hustlin & shit 
Tryna work up some Muse Money $

Gotta start calculating the round trip if I wanna do this right $

2nd different moving company I’ve seen today
- Two twigs moving (puny points)
- hornet moving (swag points) $$

Don’t be afraid to be picky
Just don’t be a dick about declining shit $$

We gots a shawty with red pants at the pump across the street 
Might be a bad bitch. Idk tho
My vision is fucked haha $

You don’t need much in life
Just enough to look forward to $$$*

Are they seriously still doing Covid vaccines?
You deserve the MYOC if you’re still hoping for the MRNA to save your A S S $

Wonder if shawty would judge me if she knew that recently I’d be putting 6$ in the tank when I fill up $

Suburban poetry be like:
Running around the town 
Feeling like the class clown
With an upside down frown
That comes with the crown $

You Can’t drown if you can flow $$

I am pretty lousy with money mostly cuz idc about it and I’m not afraid of being broke $

I don’t care if I suck
I do care if I sell out tho
Good thing I don’t have many offers to be tempted by at the moment haha $

You are what you eat 
& I’ve been eating hella beef last couple years $

I gots to peeeeeee $

Wish they could just rewind my consciousness and cut the good stuff into a film so I don’t have to do all this fucking editing omg it’s endless $

Today’s my run focus day and I’m not hungry…
I’m supposed to be eating a ton of carbs😂 $

Um
wtf are these things

Must be new $

Gonna go post up at chick fil a
Wish me luck $

Wisdom is knowing that when dashing,
The mileage is the most important metric $$

lol about to go do sprints at the park
Grab a gram otw home
Then Put it down on the Pad 🤙🏻 $

First thing you get after you get a little fit is territorial $$$*

Anyone who says the truth isn’t a superpower has been lied to a lot $$

Anyone who says the truth is irrelevant is still stuck behind the symbolism $$

Technically speaking 
Most likely something you’re doing right now is more wrong than right 
but that’s all right $$

Good thing my name has two Rs and Ts cus I be eating them Sammie’s two at a time too $

It Makes sense if you don’t question it $

Happy 1:31 pm fam’s and famets $

My brain cells be out to lunch still $

Or that PB&J was laced $

Weed is the one “drug” that gets harder to use the higher you get $$

3 hits later and you forget you were even smoking $$

If you struggle to bulk then you just need a good Toast recipe $$

We’re good, We got more eggs & butter $

spirits are just units of awareness
They feel the same watching us as we do watching Netflix 
They just got a much better seat $$

In a perfect world, you can’t have honor
As there would be no option to earn it
Everything would always be perfect 
So the one thing heaven can’t offer- honor $

Qualifications for suburban camping $$$
- AC is gone out 
- Heats is gone out 
- Power is gone out 
- Everything is dirty as fuck 
- Tent in backyard
- Fort in living room
- Tent in living room
- Sleeping in car WHILE ITS OFF
- SLEEPOVERS AND SLUMBER PARTIES
- THAT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO BE IN BUT WHATEVER
- oh, maybe I left the cap lock on
- All night ragers 🎉 

Never ever ever for never ever stop believing in yourself $$$

Making tuna sliders…
With toast and mayo 
We’ll see haha
I’m out of crackers $

You know that episode of SpongeBob where he invites all the jellyfish over and they have a massive party and Squidward gets all pissed off
But during the party they start playing out those bangers
Well, I got the DJ house party music playing in my head right now $

I’m a ginger, and that still might be the whitest shit I’ve ever done $

Joe Rogans is probably tired of me annoying him telepathically $

I know Rogan and I (are) would be best friends $

And just about every guest he’s ever had on
I’d love to kick it and train with them
 〽️❤️〽️ $

Rogan is Opera for men $

I’m Tryna get into Bear mode for the season 
Which is where I sleep more and eat more and wear hoodies about the same amount but outside more $

I honestly need to fatten up a lil bit
*gets excited $

Few things you can’t achieve with a heavy stick $$$

You can achieve all things with 3 types of sticks-
Super short (pen)
Long but light (mob stick)
Long but heavy (bb) $$$

It’s pronounced BB 
Like in Bebe girl $$

Solid day but still don’t feel like I did enough so guess that means everything is normal lol $$$*

Trusting the process gets easier 
Like a roller coaster gets less nauseous 🤢 $$*

Up down & all around 
So many words but still no sounds $

I’m not very threatening to anyone but I’m a very serious threat towards popcorn and cookies $$$

You are what you eat
*eats baked goods $$$*

Shaq just stole my “jokes on you” line $

My ego seriously thinks it’s Jesus 
Not in the “I’m an actual god” way
But in the “might be a Martyr” way
And also cuz it’s the greatest ego of all time… $

Trust- I do not think I am not better than anyone 
It’s the opposite and I have to overcompensate with humor lol $

I love playing with the kitty but shit gets a little much sometimes 🐈‍⬛ $

Mostly cus of the mixed signals all the fucking time $

A client gave me a pair of Nike air shoes (idk name) 👟 
Nothing wrong with em, just didn’t initially like the style or think they fit right (slightly big)
I was about to donate em 
But I said wth I’ll try em on and see
And now they’re my new favorite 
The air bubble is no joke and they’re so light 
They’re knitted or something (material wise)
High tops - good cuz I needed a new High top 
And come to think of it- they’re the same grey/white/ black colorway as my old running shoes (ones that got a ton miles and partly why my big toes are crooked) $

My favorite way to fly is under the radar $$*

The best way to describe my summer
A “mid life” mid life rehab & reset $

Literally dude
Ever have to detox from amphetamines “sober”? (Being perscribed Adderall for 6 months)
Brutal $$

I’m glad I did it mostly without any substantial psys 🍄 
Really beat the fuck out of my ego $$

But I need some shroomies so effin bad 😂 $$$*

I’ve sleep really well last few nights 
Hope it continues and that my anxiety won’t skyrocket 〽️ $

This is my social battery 〽️ $$$*

I wish you could invert emojis $

Reassuring myself that I did a good job today 
It’s like I emotionally forget and have to intellectually climb off waves of guilt back to a place of temporary acceptance 
Before I forget again and have to think my way into feeling…
*lighter flicks $
 

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-20-25

A good prediction might as well be a warning $$

Today might be a long one lol $

Gonna Need a fresh nug for this $

That whole “ someone’s gotta do it” logic is most notoriously used in reverse $$

Why not be the one that applies that towards serving others? $$

Be kind to those who don’t believe in magic
They’ve clearly never seen miracles $$$

Emotions related to “unfinished business” get amplified upon death
So if you kill yourself to escape consequences- oh brother…. $$$

Miracles are dope but it’s still better to not be in the position of relying on them (if reasonably possible) $$

Fuck, I drank too much in my own Kool-Aid again
Can’t help it sometimes. it taste so good $

Haha I love how I’m considering smoking cigs again
Not vape- cigs 
The Vape is more addictive and harder to quit $

I love how three big ass military helicopters flew over my house right when I got back from the gym
(my second session in five months really)
I mean, they were flying low and slow and they were right over the house
Like so loud that everything was vibrating a little bit
So it’s not like it was a stretch
I mean, they were literally directly over my street pretty much
Adjusting for the pedestrian angle, obviously $

But it was about four months ago, exactly that I entered this tomb
So that would be about 120 days of being shitfaced on symbolism $

Them spirits knew I was destined for greatness 
That’s why they’ve been trolling me my whole fucking life $

If you wanna be an Extra in someone’s movie, you can’t act like one in your own
(W.e that means) $$

Forgot what I wanted to write down while I was eating them eggs $

Don’t worry- I’m just getting warmed up $

“Niggling” is the riskiest word in the English language $$$

Most people have never burnt their egos on the spiritual stove and it shows $$$

The most painful things are social $$$

A real retsam can do it Sdrawkcab $

The Best thing is being a normal dude $$$

Uh yea, all parties agree that it’s in the Best interest for all parties involved if we consolidate into one massive party to celebrate. 
Now that is an idea I can be a party too $

Many of the smartest people can’t pay their bills due to some other limiting health circumstances $$

Toast hits different at all hours of the day
Not better or worse at any particular time- toast has evolved higher than our materialistic hierarchy - think color wheel $$$

Those who profit on the pain of others are building hell. $$$

Caffeine is the most mind and mood altering of all time
If you go based on sheer consumption points $$$

True hell (or heaven) is “who you are” 
meeting “who you could have been” $$$

Everyone’s addicted to something 
Some are just actively abstinent $$

The buzz from the sludge shot is kicking in $

If I can steal your awareness, there is nothing I can’t illuminate $

Warming my hands by the suburban fire
*sticks them in oven $

I like shit that hits a little different each time.
Try reading my notes backwards sometime and you’ll see my point $

Nothing like the open flame amirite $

It’s not fair to call plants drugs because they were plants first $$

Sorry to say but there is no technique to properly bury the past
Only to dig it up $$$*

Do you think plants get high on their own supply? $

do you think that the oxygen we exhale is laced with our own bullshit?
Like energy seasoning $

I mean, plants are literally eating sunlight 
it makes sense that they could feed off your vibes too $$$

I don’t think I could ever trust an obese doctor 
You shouldn’t either $$$

“How would you feel they made fun of your writing at parties?”
Well, it’s actually intended to be read then… $

The most ancient recurring visual is of your own hands $$

It’s pretty easy to tell who doesn’t understand energy
And it’s even easier to tell those who feed off the energy of others $$$

I ain’t scared of being alone
Im scared of being surrounded b idiots $

Forgot that I lived off Lancaster highway for 4 years… $

The secret is ….
The goal posts do move when you’re not looking $$$

If you’re reading this-
😘 $

I guarantee-
If you don’t believe forgiveness can set you free it’s because you have not tried $$$

Forgiveness requires serving the other person unapologetically while actively disregarding your own petty part $$$

If you haven’t heard the expression about cleaning up streets, then you have obviously had been living on an easy one $$

Or have had a servant do it for you $

 $$$

If the most important positions in leadership operate on a need to know basis-
Tf you think that makes spiritual matters? $$$

Most people are hardgainers (of gratitude) $$$*

AutoCorrect originally thought I said riding to Hardee’s 
Which made me laugh $

Doubling up on my toast right now $

One day I’m just not gonna correct AutoCorrect and see what happens $

Fuck that’s good toast $

I have not checked to see if these new emojis are compatible on the website but hey we’re gonna find out ✌🏻 $

It’s better to serve others in their pursuit of a false goal than to pursue a false goal in yourself
Because at least while you were serving others, you were innocent and you got the benefit of getting out of your own head $

I just had 3 slices for dinner… $

Wait… something feels… familiar $

I’m seriously considering slice #3
But extra butter 🫠 $

TUCK THAHS GOOD TOES $

Fuck I want some cake rn $

Love when I pack a bowl for myself and forget and find it and then get excited $

Fuck can’t find my lighter lol $

I found it lol $

Okay back to work
*lighter flicks $

“Yep. It’s official 
This calls for a victory hit”
*flushes toilet $

Yep. It’s official 
This calls for a victory hit
*punches father $$$

Watching climate scientists continually affirm that nobody agrees on shit is oddly comforting $

Suburban betrayal is pulling for a different team cuz you got money on the game $$$

It’s every white kids final right of passage to defeat his father in a fight $$$

There’s a section of heaven that’s part Wal Mart and part bouncey house $$

It’s near the “deadlift a deadbeat” section
Whoever’s lifts the biggest POS wins $$

If you can lift your father- you get all their assets $$$

Casper the friendly Ghost smokes that gas ⛽️ 
No doubt $$

You should be strong enough to lift others up 
Because eventually you will need to
And eventually, you’ll need them $$

Think fear factor 
Mixed with deal or no deal
With a Robin Hood avenging goal $

Oh fuck
Santa’s been with the CIA the whole time!
Explains the sleigh.. 🛷 $$$

If there isn’t one already, ima create a hidden reality show/ sweepstakes give away for those who are invisible but still make their efforts shine $$$

I only document maybe at most .0001% of my daily thoughts… $

My notes are a good quality sample size tho haha $

The “I almost got away with it” show uses that “almost” loose af $$

I was a Christmas Scrooge for a while 
I was smoking the shit pipe of self righteousness 
(And was emotionally rotted out) $

But it is the perfect background show
It’s like cops
Mixed with forensic files
Mixed with lock up
Mixed with americas funniest home videos $

Gonna be like 3 days late editing this 😂😂 $

Can’t wait till everyone has access to a virtual journal so they can log their most profound and meaningful ideas as often as they want
Then, only then, will people finally love each other without conflict 
and everyone will be happy and free* $$$

Reading and watching my own shit scares me more than anything else
Which is why I’m making sure it’s authentic 
Cuz I love me (in a reasonable way) so as long as the art reflects that - I’ll love it
Or not hate it 😂 $

〽️〽️〽️ Gotta keep it on the fresh emo list $

Ima start doing sales seminars for free to expose those on the dark side $

Alright, hear me out…
🤫🫢😏🙂‍↔️🙂‍↕️🥸😜😅🥹😘😗😇
🤔🧐🫡🎬
I know, crazy right?
*lighter fliccc $

The best time to blaze that weed stuff is between 2:40am and 4:20 pm $$$

The second best time is anytime outside those 💯 $$$

If I double dip at the movies tonight- 
I may have to take a rest day for my tongue and thumbs $

The suburban switchero is when you take the less used light bulbs from one room and swap them with the high traffic common area bulbs 💡 $$$*

*clears throat
“Thumbs are just arm tongues”
…..
“it’s cool- I’ll leave” $

Here’s a scary story 
NOT SAFE FOR KIDS-
You’re chillin at your house
Friday night
Chilly November 
You smoke a blunt- mind ya own business
Cop pulls up- talks shit- arrests you for a roach 
You spend the night in jail- all 13hrs
Get out- smoke the blunt they arrested you for (dummies didn’t find the real stash carefully concealed near my dong)

Story time from Bout 15 yrs ago
POV: You’re 16 years old, it’s been 90 days since you’ve been expelled from high school and it’s the day the state takes your license for a year
Your girlfriend just fucked your best friend (that you’re aware of). You’ve eaten nothing but cheese it’s for the past 36 hrs
You rail a ritilian on the back of your grandmas old dodge intrepid 
You dust off the old year book and roll up a bleezy 
*lighter flick $ * $$$

A mile in my shoes $
- Jordan’s 
- Running 
- Skate
- Flops
- Misc
- Dress

🎶 cuz every little thing, gon be alright 🎶 $$$

Happy 2:30 am $

〽️ Bounce 〽️❤️〽️ Bounce 〽️ $

Happy 9:36 pm $$

I may not be Jesus but I do get the whole bloody eyes business $$

(They bleeding from the weed or tears haha) $

A “No comment” Comment column 
but it’s literally just comments $

My notes in school closely resembled what you see before you today $$

Happy 2:33am $

Still thinking bout more toast…
UGH 😑 $

You can’t tell me I don’t keep it real $

That was my fav face -_-
Glad to see he made it to the big leagues $

If you’re reading this-
Sup 🤙🏻 $

😘 $$

Sorry… that was… inappropriate….😜 $

“Okay- time to straighten up “
*leans to other side $$

Do people actually enjoy making those lame CBS daytime episodic dramas?
They better cuz idk if people enjoy watching them… 🤷🏻‍♂️ $

Cuz is better with a Z
Cus with an S sounds lispy $$$*

I act brand new everyday cuz nothing else in my life ever fucking changes 😂😂😂 $$!*

The toast craving is more spiritual than a physical tbh $$$*

Ehh, I’m not in the mood for midnight mobility $

Love that kitty so much
He’s just the best
(No disrespect to the other kitties)🐈‍⬛ $$

We will never give up!
We will never surrender!
*clears bowl $

Meows meow 
Hahahaha autocorrect has the correct spelling of meow as meow and not moew 
That’s crazy meow $

*cough 
That’s 5
Meow 
*cough
6 $

Happy 2:42am
Yall member what that means ?
It’s officially Bakers hour 
(Already like 6 hits deep and on the edge of consciousness) $

I swear on God
Baking & making fun of these dumb criminals is a spiritual experience $$$

This time frame is special cuz people are sleeping and cannot annoy you during this period $$$*

You get a fresh palate from the Wake
And a fresh spiritual release with the Bake $$$

I hope some weed shop reads this and sponsors me
Cuz that would be a wise move $$$*

I’d be a great smokesperson $$$*

If you think about it, what I’m doing right now might be the exact opposite of stand-up comedy 
Which means I’d be amazing at stand-up comedy $

ADHD just inverts everything. 
Ex.
Put on TV show
And unless it’s super captivating and niche
it’ll give me 10000x unrelated ideas / prompts $

The theoretical lol is different than the literal lol 
And a much easier target to hit $$$

My attention bounces like a racquet ball and less like a basketball 🏀 $

“All I gotta do is tickle you just a little bit on the inside and you’ll be back for more”
Her: 🫠😅😘🫡🙂‍↕️😩🤤 $

lol sorry 
Starting to slip more than I’m sliding 
Into them DMs aha 🤙🏻 $

lol sorry
The fuck boy in me is acting up 🔝 $

Homie was just like 
“Uh yea bad news yall
I killed her and I’m leaving. 
And you can’t talk me out of it…..
.
..
…
….
Aren’t you going to try to talk me out of it? $

I’m so shelled- I can speak to turtles 🐢 $$

I’m so shelled- I’m la Vida Mac & Cheese 🫕 $$

My eyelids are lower than my standards currently haha $

Wow, we’re really now deep huh 🤔 $

Okay- time to hit the hay
Hay: NO NOT AGAIN PLZ $

We have made it around the loop once more brothers and brotherets ⭕️ $

Emojis worthy of revisiting: 🔂▪️◼️🏴⤵️⬛️▫️🟥🔲🔳❇️◾️◽️🏳️🆒🆖🆕⏺️🪯🆙🛅♍️🪢⚛️♋️🛄♏️✡️🚻🏧🔣☸️🕉️☪️🛐↪️↩️📶🔃💹🔄 $$$

My cat and notepad have successfully replaced most of my social circle ⭕️ $

I have never had as much peace ✌🏻 $$

If I’m writing messages to my future self 
Then am i just receiving ideas from my future self?
*solves time travel $

Hate to confess that im probably still on the tinder swipe top 🔝 100
And I haven’t been on it since 2022 😂😂 $$

I did the online dating just like everyone else
But Im glad I never went overboard with the sleezy behavior 
But that’s cuz I had a good support system 
Without it… brother…. $

Big break: *arrives
Me: *exhales
“What took so long”
Big break: *mumbling
“Fucking dick…” $$

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-21-25

If you wanna be in the top 1% then you can’t ignore the 1% details in your day to day life $$$*

Wisdom is knowledge in action $$$*

Most writers are alcoholics because they’re already addicted to their own thoughts $$

Wisdom is applied knowledge $$

We back at the CVS currently 
Kickin it
Hustlin & shit 
Tryna work up some Muse Money $

Gotta start calculating the round trip if I wanna do this right $

2nd different moving company I’ve seen today
- Two twigs moving (puny points)
- hornet moving (swag points) $$

Don’t be afraid to be picky
Just don’t be a dick about declining shit $$

We gots a shawty with red pants at the pump across the street 
Might be a bad bitch. Idk tho
My vision is fucked haha $

You don’t need much in life
Just enough to look forward to $$$*

Are they seriously still doing Covid vaccines?
You deserve the MYOC if you’re still hoping for the MRNA to save your A S S $

Wonder if shawty would judge me if she knew that recently I’d be putting 6$ in the tank when I fill up $

Suburban poetry be like:
Running around the town 
Feeling like the class clown
With an upside down frown
That comes with the crown $

You Can’t drown if you can flow $$

I am pretty lousy with money mostly cuz idc about it and I’m not afraid of being broke $

I don’t care if I suck
I do care if I sell out tho
Good thing I don’t have many offers to be tempted by at the moment haha $

You are what you eat 
& I’ve been eating hella beef last couple years $

I gots to peeeeeee $

Wish they could just rewind my consciousness and cut the good stuff into a film so I don’t have to do all this fucking editing omg it’s endless $

Today’s my run focus day and I’m not hungry…
I’m supposed to be eating a ton of carbs😂 $

Um
wtf are these things

Must be new $

Gonna go post up at chick fil a
Wish me luck $

Wisdom is knowing that when dashing,
The mileage is the most important metric $$

lol about to go do sprints at the park
Grab a gram otw home
Then Put it down on the Pad 🤙🏻 $

First thing you get after you get a little fit is territorial $$$*

Anyone who says the truth isn’t a superpower has been lied to a lot $$

Anyone who says the truth is irrelevant is still stuck behind the symbolism $$

Technically speaking 
Most likely something you’re doing right now is more wrong than right 
but that’s all right $$

Good thing my name has two Rs and Ts cus I be eating them Sammie’s two at a time too $

It Makes sense if you don’t question it $

Happy 1:31 pm fam’s and famets $

My brain cells be out to lunch still $

Or that PB&J was laced $

Weed is the one “drug” that gets harder to use the higher you get $$

3 hits later and you forget you were even smoking $$

If you struggle to bulk then you just need a good Toast recipe $$

We’re good, We got more eggs & butter $

spirits are just units of awareness
They feel the same watching us as we do watching Netflix 
They just got a much better seat $$

In a perfect world, you can’t have honor
As there would be no option to earn it
Everything would always be perfect 
So the one thing heaven can’t offer- honor $

Qualifications for suburban camping $$$
- AC is gone out 
- Heats is gone out 
- Power is gone out 
- Everything is dirty as fuck 
- Tent in backyard
- Fort in living room
- Tent in living room
- Sleeping in car WHILE ITS OFF
- SLEEPOVERS AND SLUMBER PARTIES
- THAT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO BE IN BUT WHATEVER
- oh, maybe I left the cap lock on
- All night ragers 🎉 

Never ever ever for never ever stop believing in yourself $$$

Making tuna sliders…
With toast and mayo 
We’ll see haha
I’m out of crackers $

You know that episode of SpongeBob where he invites all the jellyfish over and they have a massive party and Squidward gets all pissed off
But during the party they start playing out those bangers
Well, I got the DJ house party music playing in my head right now $

I’m a ginger, and that still might be the whitest shit I’ve ever done $

Joe Rogans is probably tired of me annoying him telepathically $

I know Rogan and I (are) would be best friends $

And just about every guest he’s ever had on
I’d love to kick it and train with them
 〽️❤️〽️ $

Rogan is Opera for men $

I’m Tryna get into Bear mode for the season 
Which is where I sleep more and eat more and wear hoodies about the same amount but outside more $

I honestly need to fatten up a lil bit
*gets excited $

Few things you can’t achieve with a heavy stick $$$

You can achieve all things with 3 types of sticks-
Super short (pen)
Long but light (mob stick)
Long but heavy (bb) $$$

It’s pronounced BB 
Like in Bebe girl $$

Solid day but still don’t feel like I did enough so guess that means everything is normal lol $$$*

Trusting the process gets easier 
Like a roller coaster gets less nauseous 🤢 $$*

Up down & all around 
So many words but still no sounds $

I’m not very threatening to anyone but I’m a very serious threat towards popcorn and cookies $$$

You are what you eat
*eats baked goods $$$*

Shaq just stole my “jokes on you” line $

My ego seriously thinks it’s Jesus 
Not in the “I’m an actual god” way
But in the “might be a Martyr” way
And also cuz it’s the greatest ego of all time… $

Trust- I do not think I am not better than anyone 
It’s the opposite and I have to overcompensate with humor lol $

I love playing with the kitty but shit gets a little much sometimes 🐈‍⬛ $

Mostly cus of the mixed signals all the fucking time $

A client gave me a pair of Nike air shoes (idk name) 👟 
Nothing wrong with em, just didn’t initially like the style or think they fit right (slightly big)
I was about to donate em 
But I said wth I’ll try em on and see
And now they’re my new favorite 
The air bubble is no joke and they’re so light 
They’re knitted or something (material wise)
High tops - good cuz I needed a new High top 
And come to think of it- they’re the same grey/white/ black colorway as my old running shoes (ones that got a ton miles and partly why my big toes are crooked) $

My favorite way to fly is under the radar $$*

The best way to describe my summer
A “mid life” mid life rehab & reset $

Literally dude
Ever have to detox from amphetamines “sober”? (Being perscribed Adderall for 6 months)
Brutal $$

I’m glad I did it mostly without any substantial psys 🍄 
Really beat the fuck out of my ego $$

But I need some shroomies so effin bad 😂 $$$*

I’ve sleep really well last few nights 
Hope it continues and that my anxiety won’t skyrocket 〽️ $

This is my social battery 〽️ $$$*

I wish you could invert emojis $

Reassuring myself that I did a good job today 
It’s like I emotionally forget and have to intellectually climb off waves of guilt back to a place of temporary acceptance 
Before I forget again and have to think my way into feeling…
*lighter flicks $
 

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-22-25

Sup $

It’s your boy 
*shocker* $

Anywho- happy 12:00am haha $

Think I’m gonna mix and mash it today
(Intermix the lines, sprinkle in some philo seasoning)
🧂 - nice salt emoji $

Remembering the most important lesson from Scooby Doo-
Monsters are always men in masks (or hot girls) $$

As long as you work hard
You’ll be known as someone who works hard
Thereby deterring those who don’t work hard 
Which alone is hard work $$

Scritch scratch lol ? 😂 $

I’m more shelled than the beach after a storm ☔️ $

Moving like a tortoise cuz I’m so shelled 🐢 $

Shellton is the best turtle name 🐢 $$

lol I need to eat but I’m thinking bout eating the other half of the tab first (Kratom) $

Which if you ain’t know-
Kratom comes in many forms
Kinda like coffee/ kinda like codeine 
Good for Mood, focus, pain, pleasure
Depends on amount/ intent 
Ground leaves (powder) is most common, mild, and cheap
Extracts is where shit gets crazy these days
Some are actually very potent- strong as narcotics 
So caution is advised $$$

These new tablets are as strong as an oxy but not in a good way per say
So it’s best split up (I break one 10mg into 3/4 pieces at time)
5mg is sweet spot for max chillax
1-2mg is coffee replacement $$$

For pleasurable dosing, I limit to 1/2 nights per week (preferred over alcohol)
But gotta be strict & limit it to that with the extracts as they can be extra habit forming $$$

But Kratom is an amazing herbal tool if used properly and with managed expectations $$$

Some asshats abuse it but it is still less harmful than just about anything else 
(Way better than alcohol and pills )
Not quite as forgiving as cannabis $$$

Cannabis is way more forgiving than caffeine 
Kratom is even more forgiving than caffeine 
Alcohol is the least forgiving of them all (& benzos)
(Tolerance and withdrawal wise for heavy users) $$$

Carbs and caffeine are equal in forgiveness
But they’re still solid 5s on the habit / addiction scale 
(More like 7s for some people) $$$

Yea- probably gonna hit the other half
…..
Well idk haha. Current buzz is solid
….
Okay leaning back to yes 
….
Fuck it hahah $

Why the fuck they clap when they read the will? $

If I can make “drafts” cool or atleast people less scared of them then that would be pretty cool $$

If someone doesn’t know something
9/10 times it’s because they didn’t care enough to find out until now
(Regarding reasonable facts & findings) $$$

Happy 1:30am $

Watching the crazy doctor move his even crazier mistress into his house to cope with the Mendez case madness is incredible $

Ooooo then that bitch went and snitched $

Limit your trust in those who haven’t suffered ego death 
It’s the same as “don’t swim with someone who doesn’t know how”. They’ll panic and attempt to drown you “innocently”. $$

Happy 1:33am $

That was a-line-a-minute pace just now $

Not bad but not anything special tbh (describes everything I’ve ever done ✔️) $

That’s a Solid check ngl ✔️ $

Bout time for sleepys 😴 
Fuck it haha not gonna wait $

Dancing is most definitely a form of resistance $

Dedicated to the art of resistance- in all its forms $

The ancients knew - A man is only as good as his stones $$$

My spirit ancient af
All it wants to do is build pyramids with heavy objects $$

“Man discovers cool plant 🌱 “- a story as old as time $$

If you can think big
Then think small
You can create it all $$$

Studying drugs but refusing to use them is actually a conflict of interest 
Not the other way around 
Saying- Nobody wants to take drugs from someone who’s never done it $$$

Depression is being stuck in a bad loop with next to zero tools to escape it $$$

Happy 6:28 am $

Oh yea- warning about Kratom
It’ll make you constipated if you use too much 
especially high does of the ground leaves $$$

Being a performance coach, Real estate agent, sneaker hustler, and personal trainer taught me how to use my words to work $

Food service, manual labor, and administrative roles taught me how To grind mindlessly $

But for my entire adult life- I’m truly working when I’m using my words
Or negotiating something
Or challenging someone to do something $

So maybe a good way to measure my time “on the clock” is to check my screen time haha $

If you write enough training programs you start to realize hidden patterns and cycles in shit $$

Goal: make others training program “special’s” look like a joke $

When the sun is low the shadows are long $

I prefer to make ordinary days special due to the already low expectations 
I prefer to work on the weekends to defy expectations one more
I prefer to rest when others work due to the emotional contrast $$

Bout to tell all the training secrets $

The same people romanticizing money are the same ones fantasizing about giving their pistol a blowjob $$

😂😂😂 set the lunk alarm off at planet at like 12:45pm
I didn’t even have any weight on the hack squat 
It fell from its hook 🪝 $

List of Gratitude lists $
- Simple
- Acrostic 
- Spiritual 

YT- shorts until 10/31 $
IG- 
- Friday- db curl
- Saturday 25 - climbing 
- Sun 26- backpacking
- Mon 27 - m clouds
- Tue- skip 28- (long form needed)
- Wed- 29 pull up- w/ lats
- Thursday- 30 - skip- long form needed
- Friday- 31- skil

Training secrets: $
- You don’t have to fail the same way each time
- There are many types of PRs
- The gym is most crowded right before / after it’s least crowded 

Products: $
- JDGSG 

 

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-23-25

Love shows that start with a spiraling youth 🌀 $

Oh,
Good Morning 
Hehe, didn’t see you there $

Of course- we have another super smart nerdy youth unexpectedly saving the day and the girl and gets to be the hero basically $

Fuck… getting hungry 🤤 $

Damn, I can’t really use that emoji anymore
I spent too much time on them dating apps… $

Takes a lot of work to recover from FuckBoy-itis $$$

Another day, Another philosophical labyrinth to navigate 🗺️ $$

Dudes be balls deep in a murder investigation and still be trying get balls deep in a rando broad $$

Karma always comes to collect $$$

What if you found out that Santa (king karma) paid off the CIA to get all their files on you
How would that make you feel?
*gets excited 😆 $

A true alchemist doesn’t have “dirt”
Just hella content $$$

*sugar rush kicks in
YALL READY TO FUCKING RUNNNN 🏃 $

My oatmeal could be a controlled substance 😂😂
Definitely stimulant/ antidepressant $

Happy 2:40 am $$

Pro tip-
When cooking oatmeal 
COOK it- don’t just mix it with hot water
Boil that shit for 6 min
(Add 3 spoons of sugar/ 12 scoops of oats) $

It’s fine-You can just email me thank you letters $

The E in email must stand for energy
Cuz it doesn’t stand for enternet $$

FUCK THATS GOOD SHIT
*clears bowl $

Remembering I’ve worked about every kind of shift you can schedule $

I’ve worked from home, in homes, and even sold the home(s) themselves
I’ve worked in gyms, restaurants, and a few places inbetween $

I’ve served, slaved, and hustled in many ways
And I’ve done it all, just to get a little pay &

Gotta set that oatmeal to Type 2
(Hypertrophy, not diabetes) $

I bet the girl at food lion is like
“It’s that egg boy again”
The dude just gets 90 eggs and 30 bottles of water $

The joke is only on you now because it was on me for such a long period of time before hand $$

Idk where this came from but
If Bears can be undeniably cute and undeniably dangerous 
So can you 
So can anyone 🐻 $$$

I guess this is just a long list of tweets that never tweeted
(I actually never had a real twitter or X) $$

I’m the kinda guy that designs boxes 
Not “thinks inside one “📦 $

It’s the unsuspecting days that change your life the most $$

But if you go around suspecting everything then that’s not very unsuspecting $$

Oh brother,
They killed the brother…$

Happy 3:22am
Real riters hour $

My variation of poetry is like intellectual graffiti $$

Just looks like regular writing until you go to read it
Then shit gets colorful $$

Who knew something black & white would be so colorful $$

Magic is just awareness management $$$

Remembering how I threw up cuz how spicy the Tea was this am
(Pretty intense heaving too- not fun) 🤩 $

Ahh
Time to pack it in for the night
*lighter flick $

I live to sneak a smoke and shoot the shit 💨 
I love to sneak a smoke and shoot the shit ❤️ $$

Happy 3:30am 🕰️ $$$

Call that grandfathers hour$$$

TRG $
- fri
- Sat
- Sun
- Mon
- Tue 

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-24-25

Most of the time, People don’t care about getting the best
Just not having their time wasted $$$

What a great morning to swing back and forth (intellectually) $$

You have to be an intellectual in order to spell the shit right… $$$

Don’t mind me, just stirring the Pot $$

Oatmeal set to Diabetes $

When admitted to the school of the Mystery’s,
Every initiate is given a notebook, a pistol, and an itch that can’t be scratched $$

Art is the answer to ignorance $$$

Everybody’s got that super mysterious uncle 
(Not to be confused with the super creepy uncle) $$

“Which computer is yours?
The one with all the cat and Mushroom stickers…?”
….
“& the melting Chuckie..” $

Trippy frog don’t play no games 🐸 $$

How to scare an egotist:
Just Don’t engage them 
They’ll soon begin to panic $$

How do you let everyone know they’re doing it wrong without being a dick?
Asking for a friend… $

As long as you Do one thing at a time, you can Alternate as fast as you want $$

I know I’m wearing all black today but everything’s fine… I swear $

My big black cargo sweats may be so 1990s but they hide the pistol the best so…$$

Guess they’re the most warm cuz they hide the heat $

Coaching is a philosophers training session $$

If someone tells you that they love you more than anything else
And if there is even a slightest bit of you, that doesn’t believe that, then they are lying
Because it is the most obvious and undeniable thing in the entire world when someone loves others more than themselves $$$

Time to check in and see how the day is going because I feel like a failure 
So it’s Saturday, October 25, 2025 
It is exactly 1 PM 
I’ve been awake since 7 AM 
I cleaned because it was the right thing to do at the right time
I have coached 
I have written
I have shared at least three posts
I have delivered three orders
I’ve only had three caffeine pills and one of them hasn’t kicked in yet
I’ve only had two bags of tea slowly over the course of three hours and one isn’t even finished
And I haven’t taken more than three hits of anything besides the D8 vape, but that doesn’t count
I’ve gone to the grocery store and bought three cans of tuna one box of crackers, and one little squirt bottle of caffeine $

The biggest takeaways to all of that being I did all of those productive beneficial things just cause
For the most part, they were unconscious actions
Not the most fun, but also not the most torturous $

The fact that I feel no credit for doing what I was supposed to do is a good thing spiritually but bad thing biologically $$

I gotta get my smoke on 
So I can get the munch on 
So I can get the pump on 
In three or four hours $

Guess there are two sides to every thought 
And two holes for every thot $$

Busted out the old iPad this morning
It’s been a while since I’ve used this bad boy
I guess I’ll figure out something to do with it $

Special and strong people are the results of special and shitty circumstances $$$

Don’t be surprised when those who never taken their own inventory before start keeping track of yours $$$

It’s much easier take someone else’s inventory instead of your own $$

Obv being the right kind of cocky can get you anything 
Even being president $$

Most people are too attached to their own emotions to recognize even half the humor surrounding them $$

A lot easier to control your appetite physically if you can manage it emotionally $$

Those who can control their appetite physically can control their appetite emotionally as well $$$

Most people are too concerned with finding the best camera filter to bother filtering their thoughts $$

Late afternoon Saturday hypertrophy sessions hit the feels just as hard as anything else $$

Late night weekend workouts is when the emotional warriors train $$$

Philosophy is water for the soul $$$

I am so proud of my phone man
This thing is really holding on and toughing it out 
The back is so cracked haha $

Do ghost haunt places? Or just moments in time? $$

Fear and faith cannot coexist at the same moment in time $$$

Being fit is cool
Seriously- how could you let anyone convince you it’s not? $

*random ass poem incoming
Being strong is cool
Being fast is cool
Being confident is cool
Being of service is cool
Being available is cool
Being creative is cool

Being lazy is gross
Being disrespectful is disgusting
Being angry is pathetic
Being fat is sad
Being judgmental is ignorant
Being dishonest is heartbreaking 

Being scared is normal
Being uncertain is normal 
Being excited is normal 
Being sad is normal 
Being lost is normal 
Being all over the place is normal 

Being normal is being $$$

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-25-25

If you have a tendency of shitting on ideas before they’ve had time to develop,
Don’t be surprised when your spirit takes time to reveal your true purpose $$

gotta make sure youre up spirits creek without a payer before salvation $$

A good snack can increase anyone’s faith $$$

Food Lion might have the best saltine crackers I’ve ever had
Their generic kind- super cheap, super salty
Like pretzel level salty. So gooddddd $

Crackers & tuna are super cheap and as “clean” as snacking can get really $$

Motivation follows feeling
Feelings follows faith
Faith follows intuition 
Intuition follows motivation $$

Must be hard watching everyone deal with the consequences of being pussy for so long $$

Remember that earth is a spiritual school to learn the lessons that you need to grow the fuck up and not destroy yourself with your own desires $$$

At a certain point
The only way to get something new, was to take it from someone
Then, the best you can hope for is to take it from someone who was originally trying to take it from you $$

If everything is “owned” then it is either caught, bought, or fought for $$$

It everything is consumed, then everything is utilized $$

The quickest way to go insane is to forget that life is just a game $$$

Be right back I gotta go deliver some fast food to the hospital $

Delivering DoorDash to the hospital that my mom had her heart attack and is a very strange feeling $

You would think based off some people’s reaction that the worst thing you could do is take a left-hand turn too slow $$

And that was weird 
Just had a delivery in the same place where I nearly died last year $

Combating Mental Illness is a philosophical fight
Not a biological one $$$

If it seems like you’re doing something wrong it’s because you’re probably finally not $$$

Natural foods allow your body to more properly digest and regulate the energy you get from them
Processed foods force your metabolism to act differently than it would usually nature prefer $$

Love when my neighbor is riding her bike $

As one restless individual, it’s good to see more people moving around $$

I never could sit still
My life was unmanageable until I embraced that fact $$

I don’t mean to sound like a victim but nobody has ever genuinely apologized to me for anything significant or meaningful that I can remember… $

I mean nothin 
No type of amends. Nada
Not saying I need or expect any
But I can’t be the only person who’s always in the wrong…. $

Ehh even writing that made me angry and bitter
So time to let it go and work on not making that error again $$$

See? Not very hard to make amends. $$$

The right kind of challenge gets emotionally easier with time $$

Buying cannabis with two cops chillin outside the store
What a vibe $$$

Those look like the same cruisers they arrested me in back in the day…
For less weed than what I just bought legally 
In front of them.. (a I just bout a gram for $10)…. $

The store is behind the police station too $

True evil does exist
And it’s first goal is to trick you that it doesn’t
Because if you do not believe in evil, you’re just going to blame everybody else when they are simply trying their best and just like you are $$

True evil exist because true love exists $$$

Whenever something is created, so are two distinct possibilities or directions $$

Choosing direction is the definition of free will $$$

Just because there are only two directions to pick from does not mean that there is not free Will $$

I’m from North Carolina 
Where we would die for our football but don’t wanna talk about it… $$$

Thinkin back on the last two years… $

2022- was beginning of the solo trek/ training bootcamp
2023- was hiking 55 miles in mountains
2024- was on weekend get away with GF
(Dreamin bout backpacking in mountains) $

2yrs ago was a graduation of sorts
But once I got back, it was non stop writing ✍️ $

First year was endless exercises/ training science testing
Second year was all esoteric spirituality / soul searching $

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-26-25

If Comparison is the thief of joy
Then Ill be the thief of comparison $

Driving past an old friend’s house who committed suicide at 17 years old… RIP Sam… $

If you watch the other traffic lights, then you can anticipate when the light is going to change $$

Takin a left on circumferential rd 6700 $

NC is a spiritual movie set $$

Remembering that one summer day when me and the Homie went to the private pool by the private pond, then came back to the neighborhood played airsoft. We were 13. $

Stopped At the light by Copper Creek
Near the pond where they used to find all those bodies $

life is such a joke. It’s up to you to determine how funny it is. $$$

Next delivery is next to the cemetery near Olive T St. $

Remembering the time I bought weed from a dude working at McDonald’s 
While he was on the clock $

The manager at McDonald’s has the same name as the customer I’m delivering $

remembering when I did my time
(Micky Ds- 7 months 2013) $

Philosophers don’t forget anything ever $$$

Philosophers are the only group that will let you kill them to prove a point $$$

Remembering the engaged server, I slept with when I was working at Showmars $

lil dopamine hits
Mans search for dopamine *** $$

Dashing can be humbling and frustrating but man does it provide excellent content $$

2hrs in and I’m bout $33 and the orders have been smooth mostly $

Dashing is only hard in the minutes leading up to it $$

There was a point in time in which I hated holidays because most restaurants would be closed and I really did not feel like cooking $

I went probably two years without cooking for myself at all $

Rules that seem silly or that don’t make sense at first usually end up being the most important ones for fun $$

Many of us, don’t know what to do
I don’t know what not to do $

Most people are overwhelmed when trying to come up with something
I am always overwhelmed with the amount of something in my brain $

We are not the same $

Writing requires undivided attention 
Writing anything good requires undivided suffering (usually self inflicted) $$!

3 years seems like an eternity to the scared $$$

Segments:
- Hot takes
- Secret of …. $

Secrets from the underground {recovery movement} $

You Gotta know how to manage an ego to control other egos $$$

Those who don’t believe in “more than this” have not have a {good or bad} psychedelic experience $$$

Idk why I’m throwing the brackets out 
Idek what they do that’s so special 
Some “writer” I am $

Is it writing if you’re using voice to text? $

Is it writing if you’re actually speaking from the heart? 💜 $$

The enemy is not overseas
The true enemy is not carrying an assault rifle
The true enemy is concealed in big pharma ads $$$

True evil can be found around anything in the medical field $$$

When I say shit ain’t adding up, I actually mean it’s adding up too much to a very suspicious total $$

Jersey mikes Motiv board:
Don’t be burdened by carrying what you’re not responsible for $$
(As a dasher- that’s kinda offensive haha) $

Just picked up an order from the Showmars near my house and the girl that handed me the order was one of my old managers from the one I worked at in Matthews 12 years ago
Can’t make this stuff up $

I have to run by my house while finishing this last delivery to grab my wallet (that I hope I left) for the three dollars gas money because my gas light is on $

If you don’t know how far you can drive with your gas light on then you have not really pushed it $$$

Remembering the time I spent my last five dollars on a replacement white belt $$$

Remembering the time I spent my last five dollars on the mountain day date
(She had to buy gas for the way home) $

Remembering the time I had to split payment for a dozen eggs after wiring the money from two different accounts $

Remembering all the shit I bought on credit while delivering these dishes haha $

Door dash also delivers karmic dishes $$$

Medical mistakes were the 3rd leading cause of death in 2016 $$$

I found my wallet crisis averted $

If Jesus was real then they were probably a lot of of them
Maybe even at the same time
Wouldn’t that be wild?
Burp $

I seem to have accidentally gotten on that runway cracker train again $

Sure women have to go through the pain of childbirth, but they’ll never understand the pain of having a revolutionary large idea
(Just kidding girls! $
Only those strong enough to deal with the pain of childbirth could deal with the pain of dealing with ass hats) $

And everybody knows women are far stronger than men in just about every metric (except flat bench- sorry) $$

Women are far tougher than men just about every metric $$$

Men are just more spazzy and expendable because of how dumb they are $$

I’ve had to muscle my motivation my entire life
So if I’m funny or insightful at all, that’s why $

Because if I had a little bit more dopamine, I wouldn’t have done even a quarter of the shit that I did for other people $

I am convinced that my mental health battle has been part karma and part training $$

I am most grateful for this “illness“ because of what it has taught me and the skills that it forced me to develop
It truly has become my greatest gift, but for 30 years of my life, it was the greatest curse $

Thoughts are just seeds of energy $$$

Oh, that was like the cutest little old lady ever
In her robe
Getting some showmars and enjoying the rainy day $

You think “2nd Jesus” knows he’s “Jesus”? $

When do you think 2nd Jesus gets “the talk”? How old? $

Seeing how it went the first time,
How would you train the 2nd Jesus? $

Say what you want about potheads, but they’re usually the best at making the best out of a shitty situation $$$

We all had that weird friend that went to that offbrand prep school $$

Wisdom is knowing all miles are NOT equal $$$

I wanna read Jesus’s EOD report
- 144,000 heathens saved
- 50% heathens thru credit check
- 33% heaven conv $

If you want to be sexy you gotta do the least sexy work 
*eats tuna & crackers $$

Part of the fun of being human is just overreacting to shit $$

BRB, gotta go to DoorDash in the rain
Gotta love the suck $

The rain usually means the fish are biting $$

At a certain point, suffering becomes comical 
& You get to determine the point $$

Can’t wait to lift… $

Leg day on a Monday separates the athletes from the amateurs $$$

That moment you have $2.8 and it’s more than you expected lol $

Let’s have a moment in silence for the millions stuck in traffic rn
And the ones who’ve already started drinking their preworkout $$$

Lifting report $
- movs score
- TQ score 
- Str score
- Vol 
- Ppr 
- Pps
- 2,800 points

(The notes that follow are what happen when you wake up to a govt fuckery podcast) $

Those who don’t believe in evil simply are too afraid to “see” it $$$

Being “too good” for someone is another way of saying “too naive” $$

If you look back on Covid and do not see the evil behind the narrative, then maybe refresh yourself on the whole “survival of the fittest” philosophy because those who “don’t value” you are living and killing by that motto $$

Happy 2:31am $

Everyone thinks they’re the hero
But they can’t be
Cuz I am 
(Case & point) $$

Bro 
Don’t forget that (at best) it is most likely the govt was involved in the biggest acts of terrorism 
Each and every time… $$

The founders were masters of understanding of human nature 
They stole their philosophy from the ancients who are the true masters of the world $$

The ultimate construct is time (& the 4th) $$

Stealing from someone’s goodness is evil $$$

Weaponizing someone’s Goodness against themselves is a special kind of evil $$$

Actual “Beast like” Monsters are not “terrifying”, they’re just threatening 
Cuz they are fond of destruction (& Often hungry) $$

Actual “egotist” monsters are “terrifying” because they thrive on terror 
It’s their fuel. It’s their fun $$

That philo hit different between 2:42-4:24am boi
*lighter flicks $$

Missing the oatmeal…
But the graham crackers are solid
Thx again Graham $

Ngl, There are similarities between what I am doing and mental masterbation
Cuz I’m just most playin with myself $$

POV- late night vibes in late October
Times like these are why shows like “Forensic files” hit so good
*clears bowl $

You haven’t truly met yourself until you’ve done a few midnight movie smoke sessions
For no other reason than to kick it $$$

My favorite thing (besides lifting) is the sneaky smoke sessions in the middle of the night 
Might watch a show
Listen to music
Grab a snack
let the day digest & download the next $

I think it’s the solider side of my soul
Always waking up after 4hrs to take watch $$

Guess this is what they really meant by “(k)nights watch” $$

(R) or (k)
Which gives more eye of Horus vibez?
(Turn sideways) $

Side note- god help the poor souls who have not gone down the 911 rabbit hole yet.. $

The first time I went down that one was 2012
AND I WAS LATE AF THEN $

I remember in 2012 when I first told my dad bout 911
He was like “no fucking way”
In 2024 he was gifting me crypto cuz he expected the collapse/ revolution at any moment 
(Along with a ton of emergency food which I have been eating as a broke writer 😂😂😂) $

I hesitate to call myself a writer cuz it still sounds like punishment $$$*

The irony is 
I fucking hated taking notes in school
Never did
Just doodled… $

If I asked you
“How many seconds have there ever been”
That would take you longer to answer than the answer $$$

So there are numbers so great that they are greater than existence itself 
Which means they must be “housed” on an even greater plane of existence 
That is the “Devine cloud” $$&

“How’s his writing “
….
“Ya know, bout what youd expect..”
….
🤪👍🏻
😂😂😂 $

Happy 3:30am $

Those graham crackers were/are so good
Or is it are/were? $

Prob time to grow up 
But I’d rather show up
My haters aha 🤙🏻 🛹 $

Where was the 🛹 emoji when I was growing up…
Kids these days will never understand how good they have it $

Yep. I’m officially in my 30s
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck $

Idgaf
I give 7 $$

“Might need more crackers”
-hungry or racist? $$

Shit. Im Stalling on sleep again. Shit 
lol time to cut it $

Hours of the day: 3
Sheets of crackers eaten: 3 
Happiness PRs: 1 $

My body doesn’t take it serious unless it’s atleast a 100gs of carbs or more $$

Muscle comes and goes
But developing strange dietary skills stays forever $$$

I’m a runaway train rn with these crackers $

Deadass spiritual experience $

But I can’t stop $

“God, grant me the serenity…” $

“I said that prayer a few too many times”
-me after dating a girl named Serenity $$

(& if shawty somehow reads this- remember times not real) $

That’s gotta be atleast 1,000 cals from crackers alone…
Not even 4am $

Someone Que the Brittany spears $

lol I cant possibly understand why my parents are disappointed 🥲😂 $

When I get anxious, I activate my funny cortex
It’s cuz for my entire life, I used humor as a coping mechanism $

Those who had to be funny to survive are a different level of funny $$$

Everyone squirts when squeezed 
Just different fluids $$

Sorry for that last one… $

I’ve hung around enough drama queens to know when someone’s acting 🎭 $$$

 

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-27-25

There are 3 kinds of everything 
Including fears $$$

We got a show about a young English slave turned Danish Viking who became an outcast when the English fuck boys killed his newer danish, Viking family, and blamed him for it. 
Now he and his homegirl are on the lam, trying to work up some funds to fight the English fuck boys who killed his new family 
Ironically, the English fuck boys are his original family or something like that $

Looks like the side quest potline follows a weaker related prince who is being mentored by the same mentor who mentored the original slave now Viking $

It’s kind of cool because this is classic king and castle shit $

When a punishment becomes protocol, then it becomes good training $$$

You never forget a good slice of humble pie $$

In sales, I was also the dude you went to to ask “how do I word this” $

High fructose corn syrup is a drug,
not a nutrient $$$

Nutrients are satiating
Drugs are addicting $$

The ancients really knew what they were doing when they hid everything in front of everyone’s eye(s) $$

Fuck that was a good PB&J
The HFCS really brought out the artificial grape concentrate $

PB&Js hit harder the closer you get to 4:20
Wonder why $

The gods know if you really blaze it like that or not $$

Bet the CIA thinks they’re a bunch of demigods $$

The same poison they peddle is the same fuel that rockets prefer 🚀 $$

Don’t ask me
Ask your spirit guardian after wondering the desert for 40 days & nights $$

1.67gs ish is all it takes to get right with the univ
(Universe not university) $$

Using art to manipulate others is evil $$

Sales is the most common and prevalent form of black magic $$$

Almost all acts of service had some element of guilt involved $$

Guilt is a mind and mood altering energetic substance (an Edrug) $$

Reminder-
A Bad vibe is more contagious than a bad virus (but only to the emo-compromised) $$

Many people wouldn’t recognize common sense even if it was plastered on their face 
*adjusts mask 😷 $$

God just means unity under good orderly direction 
Not spiritual Pokémon $$$

Only the egoic care about specific deities and treat religion like Pokémon $$

Kinda have a headache 
Hope it’s not fever or some shit
This is the start of the second week I’ve started leaving the house so my immune system probably asking for a warm up $

Two years ago, I summited a couple mountains
Today I summit a few more intellectually ( this time)
And the intellectual lines were much harder than the physical $

Most of the time most people are - at best - wasting their time in the gym
If they’re not actively doing more harm than good…
The kicker is that the recovery is still a little better than their spending
So they’re making progress
But there ROI is shit $

I wish more people would view the barbell the same way a musician views a guitar
Or the way an artist uses a paintbrush $

The fear of injury is overblown by the nervous Nancys of the world $$

Swear to god I nearly ran out of gas going up the hill to the gas station hahaha $

Fucking hate cringy fit culture so much
- nobody actually cares about your intense routine
- Most just put up with the ego cringe to steal tricks and tips $

Most of The gatekeepers for fitness are cringy egotists who are only looking for ways to talk about themselves 
(Ask me how I know) $$$

Many will do anything to fit in
Except get fit $$$

It’s sad to hear when people complain about their program 
Not everyone is destined to be an athlete 
Or even wants to be
But nobody has to “hate” what their doing $$

The higher your discipline, the less extra BS you’ll have to do (mistakes to clean up)
But you’ll have to stick to your lane with fierce intensity $$

Finding a flow in a commercial gym is hard
- extra hard in planet fitness $

The right process is priceless $$$

If you can find a way to enjoy the process, you’ll avoid the needless pain $$

Just keep lifting and let them worry about their AI avatars…. $$

The less you do it with, the greater the ROI $$

When building, aim low to maximize efficiency 
When dreaming, aim high to maximize meaning $$$

A good PB&J can change your day $$

The right process is damn near autonomous $$

Just in
 3/4 Scientists agree 
That 7/8 times, Quoting scientists is just marketing $$

Train long enough and you can tell who else is counting your reps $$$

It’s really hard to share anything regarding the art side of fitness without being an echo test
Even the most humble have to use their persona and their performance for proper communication of the point
But most of the time those with a little bit of fitness experience let that experience go to their head
Ask me how I know $$

I’m back with cat food and butter $

The cat food for the cat
The butter for toast and eggs
I’m probably gonna end up eating Hella bread, but whatever $

Using more resistance than you have to is just making it harder on yourself (fool card) $$

Toast is so spiritual $$$

Poison usually tastes better than medicine $$

Whenever people are staring at me (in a too obv way), I just start doing different techniques and watch them get confused $

You gotta do what only you could do
And you also have to do what anyone can do
Bonus points for the same time $$

I challenge anyone reading this to cut everybody out for a year and see what happens
See who remains after that period of time
They will probably be the only ones worth keeping $$

Only speak to the essentials and only tell them what you absolutely must or what they ask about
And see what happens $$

The wheatier , the toast, the more butter it needs $$

I think goodness is greater than greatness
For goodness sake’s. $

Yes, I prefer my poison grape flavored $

Toast just isn’t the same without a little high fruit poison am I right $$

Damn that’s good poison $

This next section is best titled 
- intellectual graffiti
- How to be cool?
- Read at parties
- Humble bragging
- Suburban dictionary
- Fun to read
- A mile in my shoes $

I just ate two pieces of toast and I liked it $

It’s 221 on a Tuesday
Perfect time to turn up
*starts podcast $

Can’t have a spiritual awakening if you prefer to sleep $$

When in doubt pick what you want and call it an experiment $$$

If you ain’t looking into the UAP stuff then maybe you should be made aware that they are looking into you $

You really don’t need to look into the UAP stuff because they’re busy looking into you already $$

I don’t know why but I’m now Watching “13 reasons why”
Maybe Hannah Baker will tell me why $

Ngl
Not a fan of the plot
Too closely romanticizes suicide
Like the writers knew it was going to be a hot potato and said fuck it
(It’s been like idk 7 years since I’ve watched it so maybe I’ll see it differently)
I remember it giving inauthentic vibez 
that it was a story being told by those who haven’t actually experienced teenage suicide $

I have learned that getting a little triggered is a good creative warm up $$

Yes yes, even this is self inflicted …. $

Never underestimate a narcissist $$$

You can make any situation about yourself if you are a big lil bitch about it $$

Love the gay tough guy persona from his “only friend” $

Clay Jensen is such a bitch tho I’m sorry $

As an actor, it Sucks to be so good at acting shitty
Cuz now you’ll always be associated with being a wimpy lil bitch $$

We replay memories like a song but we record them like a movie $$

To be emotionally considerate,
You don’t have to be smooth or cool 
But You don’t have to make it weird either… $$

Consideration will buy you more than any other currency $$$

Ugh I get physically distributed listening to Hannah’s intro tape $

I’m disturbed how the show glorifies blaming others for your suffering 
By making the victim the hero you are glorifying literal suicide by being oblivious $

But the glorification is due to a slimy, grifting esq agenda (false sincerity) $

The vibe I’m getting-
It’s like they’re pretending to have delt with tragedy 
Not just including it, they’re falsifying it in a way I can’t quite explain $

Probably just triggered cuz of my own personal feelings regarding teenage girls killing themselves
Call it a sensitive subject I guess $

Right now,
There are thousands of bros deadlifting on a smith machine… $$

Let’s have a moment of silence to the young men blowing their shoulders out today on incline smith $$$

The entire point of this life is to learn forgiveness
That is the only way to manage eternity $$

The greatest secret is
this life is going to fuck you over and you have to be able to forgive it anyway or eventually, you’ll be a prisoner of your emotions $$$

Forgiveness lessens the pain, but understanding what caused the pain to begin with is true power $$

Only an ego like mine would think it’s the best at writing these one liners $$$

I swear to God, my ego is relentless. Oh, that is a fat squirrel.
I swear I did not script that 
that was really a fat squirrel in my line of sight $

Only real adepts can forgive without ever hearing an apology $$$

Woe to those who have unwritten books in them
Shit only gets harder until you get it out $$

Good books start like tumors
They get bigger and more violent on the inside until you get it out
And the extraction process is never pretty $$

I love me a pretty ass cardinal $

I love how Cardinals stand out $

Im not even going to resist the crackers tonight 
- talking bout dinner
- Talking bout police
- Talking bout white trash $

Fuck those are good crackers 
- talking bout neighbors
- Talking bout whips and bridles 
- Talking bout dinner $

Peacocks 🦚 are endangered in the wild but overcrowded in the gym $$

My cats is also referred to as lil mfer $

Only those who are insecure about something care about perfection $$

You’ll always instantaneously recognize a trigger
Triggers by definition will emotionally hijack you 
If you don’t manage your triggers, you’ll be unable to manage your emotions $$

If you had to pick someone
To finish an impossible task for you
Who would you pick?
No matter what, this person must finish the task
Doesn’t matter when, there is no rush. But impossible is the level of the challenge (only a master can complete)
(you are allowed to pick yourself) $

Contrast can always be used constructively if you are careful $$

“What’s it like to be a prisoner 
Sorry I mean woman”
LOL KIDDING LADIES
Men are the real biological captives $

If any ladies are reading this somehow then I imagine you must be lovely with an amazing sense of humor.. 😉 $

I had 5 eggs and an entire sleeve of saltine crackers for dinner
Just so there’s no confusion about how things are going 😆 $

😂>😆
Someone had to say it $

How many hits will it take to knockout a skinny street kid 
7 or 8 probably $

Idk how to say this but the Midevil hoods are the scariest $

I challenge any crazy person reading this
Document / record as many of your thoughts and ideas as you can 
Don’t gotta share it even tho I challenge you too. Just do it until you enjoy doing it (won’t take long)
Then you’ll have priceless content about yourself forever (and incredible spiritual growth) $

Make journaling fun 
-challenge accepted 
(Might be easier than push ups ) $

True evil is when those close to you make you hate yourself or turn their back on you or gaslight you into self censorship $$

As a dasher, here are the things that I do to stay healthy …
- binge eat crackers
- Smoke hella dank $

Timeline to build
- yoga- 3 weeks
- Cardio- 3 weeks
- Bw str 3 months
- Athlete 3 years 
- Bodybuilding 3 years
The barbell is the modern day 2H sword 🗡️ 
The pen is the modern day dagger $

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-28-25

First delivery of the day was on Olive T St.
Second was on Trotter’s Ridge
The first street I ever lived on $

Not many people have ever had to escort someone around with a wheelchair. Or oxygen tank and it shows $$

Not many people have ever driven awkward strangers around and it shows $$

“I will remove you from the chair stop it stop it”- 
A ln organic accidental voice to text note from me to Alex when he was eating my charger $

Learn to listen with your eye 👁️ and your name will be immortal $$

Say thank you when someone holds the door for you 
It ain’t hard $$$

Scripture is written all fucked up for a couple reasons
- They wanted to make you think about it (mental math)
- They wanted to conceal some shit from the greedy power hungry who would use the threat of a demigod to control the masses
- They wanted to make it easy to remember
- They wanted to make it their Equivalent of Clickbait.
- The more radical it was the more attention It got. And those that could pierce through the symbolism would understand what they were really trying to say.
- Also keep in mind that winners write the history, books and death equals amnesia $$


If you learned that there will be super secret but super dope surprise for all the shit you had to eat- would that make it easier to forgive?
Cuz that is partly true. But the gift is in the forgiveness itself $$$

Writing is the top of the mental pyramid 
PowerLifting is the top of the physical pyramid $$$

What’s the age minimum for criminal conviction?
Cuz they first charged me with shit at 13yrs old (arson lol)
Think it was early November… 🤔 $

Everything has some kind of pattern to it
And a non pattern is a pattern too $

Ever witnessed two people have a polite competition?
It’s a stalemate when two people are Literally seeing who can be nicer
But neither one of them realizes what the other is doing $$

Been so long since I’ve had a resentment that I forget what it’s like 
NOT A CHALLENGE UNIV, NOT A CHALLENGE $

A String of Small techniques will add up faster than iso big singles $$

Happy 3:30pm
Ugh, gotta upload notes $

Literally, the hardest part about work is opening the computer
And sometimes that lid is very heavy $$

A victim can weaponize anything- even having too good of manners $$

If you go around being polite, just so you can justify being angry at the first instance at somebody else’s mistake then you are the problem $$$

Good to see High schoolers still taking over the local McDonald’s during lunch haha $

Bro high schoolers love running and shouting randomly at reckless speeds $

New segment-
-Kids these days $

New segment-
-Potential New segments $

Just woke up to the greatest news article of all time about aggressive research monkeys escaping $

Now I’m gonna watch umbrella Academy at the midnight movies and try to remember that life is simulation $

BRB gotta get a fresh NUG 
*grinder squeaks $

Any bit of muscle looks the same to the profane $$

My spine probably crooked as shit in the way be sitting in this smoking chair $

“ 43 women gave birth this one day back in the late 70s
It was unusual because none of them were pregnant to beginning of the day “ $

I used to hate shows like this cuz they weren’t very “realistic”
Sorry for being so naive… $

Doesn’t matter how great the weed is if your lighter doesn’t work $$

“What’s the hardest demon to defeat?”
Addiction
Specifically ego/ chemical addiction $$$

Remember how those saved usually turn on their saviors $$$

Think Jesus could be in recovery? ❤️‍🩹 
I think he’d have to be… and couldn’t be at the same time $$

Wisdom can only be accumulated thru experience 
Which is why it’s the only honest perspective in the universe $$$

Ugh
Sometimes the crackers fight back
- heartburn
- Police force
- Secret society uprising $

Can’t go anywhere without whispers about some secret society shit $$

Wake and bake is the preferred method for max chillin efficiently $$$

Salvation is only available to emotional alchemists $$

Glad to see Billy landed on his feet after the whole Pirate business 🏴‍☠️ $

Gonna sauté the profane 
Just use The Same TQ you use for small shrimps $$

12:21 AM
The fact that we have some kind of super smart/wise monkey now leading the group of super powerful orphans
Is very synchronistic considering how the day started with a news article about escaped research monkey $

“ father still believe the number five was still out there somewhere and that he never lost hope”
I mean, talk about comedic synchronicity Jesus Christ
This is why you don’t skip the movie kids $

If keeping a journal can be funny then I promise you keeping a journal can be fun $$

Alchemy Is simply adding & moving the NY & CTIONAL from FUN (with proper TQ) $

Understanding up front that enthusiasm usually falls off a cliff helps soften the landing 🛬 $

(Top of the line emoji right there) $

So Luther lives on the moon
(Side note worth noting- Autocorrect og said “in”) $

“Notes with noting” $

Many vampires don’t know they’re infected $$

“We’ve been thru this before #7. There’s just nothing special about you. “
*closes spyglass $

Love how the one super kid gets high to talk to the dead
Didn’t realize that’s what I do every night hahaha $

Spiritual communication is thru actions
Thru lifetimes $$

Stars don’t explain their power
Stars dont explain their awesomeness $

Gotta do a vibe check 
*dances awkwardly $

Homie #5 just pops back up after 45 years in the future
Back to his 13 yr old body
And his first act (besides talking shit and roasting everyone) is to make a PB& marshmallow sandwich $

Bitch I was just about to make a sammie too $

Ugh remembering how my old managers name was Sammie
(Classic definition of corporate xxxxx…) $

I remember she was one of the first people I saw during my interview 
Little did I know she’d become my manager $

Having her & Nazi sarg micromanage my life and gaslight me daily was a special kind of hell…
One that was easy to repress I guess cuz I’ve done gone and triggered myself lol $ 

New segment called “stinking thinking” $

why are the smartest always assholes ? $

Nobody likes a whiny little bitch who can’t get over their trauma and blames others for their shortcomings $$

Don’t get me wrong we all blame others, but those who go out of their way to make it known that they’re actively upset at others deserve the spiritual embarrassment that they bring upon themselves $$$

Happy 12:58 AM $

Cheating after the second attempt is just called adapting $$

Those only concerned with appearances will never build anything truly lasting $$

Anything under construction usually looks like shit for a long time until it looks pretty cool $$

Anything under construction is going to inconvenience and burden all those nearby until it becomes an extremely valuable asset $$

Be mindful of those under construction 
If you treat them poorly while they’re building, they likely won’t include you in their final plans $$$

Fucking mystics
Rewriting time and shit… $

Just cuz your plugged in doesn’t mean your charging up
*angry glaring at phone $$

Time for eggs 🍳 
& a shot of sludge $

Fortune before the fight almost always ruins the fight $$

Fame and fortune after the fight is rewarding $$

The point I am trying to prove is that self-awareness is sexy $

The funniest have seen the scariest 
And conquered it $$$

Surveys & polls agree
Don’t get much scarier than public speaking 
Especially if it’s your fucking life story… $$

1:31 AM
The punch line is always 
Jokes on you, I trained for this $

Symbolism is a sign of mastery 
Because only then can you talk about something without talking about nothing at all $$$

Love how number five is the one who time travels $

I’m not loving how AutoCorrect is phrasing each thing I say as a question $

Fuck, those are good eggs$

I’m not sure what a bad egg looks like but I know what a cracked one looks like $

The time traveling Homie said the world ends in eight days and I just feel like we should pay more attention to that $

The smallest details matter the most
Just ask your girlfriend
If you have one… $$

“Just put some things next to some other things and see who figures out the correlation
We Will accept those who figure it out into the space program” $$

The first Strength secret is that there is no secret to hard work $$$

The second secret is that we all try to find a shortcut at some point $$

The third secret is that half will deny ever trying to take the easy way $$

The fourth secret is that the only true failure is malicious dishonesty $$

I feel bad for all of those who are rude to me
I feel bad for anyone who is rude to anyone ever
I can’t imagine what it must feel like to have that pain ricocheted sevenfold just to be taught a lesson in manners, but hey $

All lessons must be learned somehow someway someday
Usually with some pain $$

You’re not supposed to make it through life safe and sane
You are not supposed to have accumulated a bunch of excess useless wealth by the time you kick the bucket
You are not supposed to be comfortable 24 seven and treated like a demigod
You are not supposed to become overly attached to the point that you become a fixture in a world that is always moving
You are not supposed to live in a world of certainty or self servitude
You are not supposed to be free of pain or struggle
You are not supposed to be an ungrateful little bitch about everything
You are not supposed to take the easy option
You are not supposed to be perfect
You are not supposed to be more than you are $$$

Amateurs are fun
Pro’s are prolific
Artists are adaptable 
Adepts are funny $

100% chance I’d be dead if I still did real drugs $

Excluding the controlled - controlled substance test last winter (which I passed with flying colors) - I haven’t done “real drugs” since 2011
Which makes almost 14 years $

No way a true addict would be able to avoid abusing an amphetamine prescription (or any alcohol, or other CS) under the most intense psychological stress you could reasonably imagine $

True addicts can’t have a single drop or MG of anything without losing control $$$

And for the record, once upon a time, that was me $

Hard to end up in the weird basements I did without a good reason $$

They use to say there were no success stories about people leaving the program 
Cuz obv those that made it didn’t go back to brag 
(Which is why I’m sad I can’t appropriately go back to meetings) $

I honestly do not recommend to anyone else that has crossed that invisible line to risk it
My situation was very strange and I’m convinced that I stopped early enough to rewrite my brain (psys also literally life saving in that regard) $

But my hot take is- after 9.3yrs- i earned the right to ask the difficult questions $

I Had to have hit over 3,300 meetings by the time I resigned lol (truthfully might be up to double that)
That’s atleast 10,000 active recovery hours 
And I’m being conservative $

Logged minimum 10,000 hrs in sales at RV in a leadership position $

Real estate is a lifestyle branding type of intellectual work
So you’re always on the clock in a mild sense
Lets count 12hrs per day but with light esq resistance 
So 12hrs a day for 5yrs is 21,900hrs
Adjusting for resis (dividing in half cuz light intensity)- that’s another 10k minimum of mastering a different kind of lifestyle marketing $

I even had the douchey Mercedes and lifetime fitness membership to match $

Weight training 
Simplest way- 
Just avg 3hrs a day for 12 years
(Even tho that’s also very conservative especially considering the last 3 yrs has been 12hrs hard work daily)
Anywho- that’s a conservative 13,000 hours of just me vs heavy shit $

Food service
Nothing crazy but was my primary alternate 
So maybe 3,000hrs on the high end
Still another 3,000 hrs of serving others… $

The coaching aspect has been unique my entire life
Cuz recovery demands it daily (service & sponsorship)
Sales required it directly/ indirectly 
(Team members/ nurturing deals)
Personal training for obv reasons
So that’s a min of 30,000 hours of “service” intentional training $

This calls for a celebration sammie $

Im ready to rock $

Needless to say 
Pros follow the process $$

Side jobs were just side quests 
And often some of the shortest / most revealing 
Like getting a new weapon $

We’re now using elaborate metaphors to explain simple concepts lol $

New segment 
“lol but not really “ $

Lol I’m back
After the strangest dream… $

Fell asleep and woke up before the podcast ended (90min) $

Can’t recall the dream but it was a wild one dealing with fuck shit haha
Shocker $

I’m just stoked to be back with Fresh party palette $

Remember online AA meetings hahahhaa
What a fucking joke
I’d rather be stalked by crazy’s in the cold
LITERALLY $

New segment 
“My life is a joke” $

I know what true crazy looks like
This AI shit don’t scare me $

What can be scarier than watching a mother choose finances over a relationship with her only child?
Watching her blow cigarette smoke in his face as he struggles to speak $

Watching a father threaten his child when his child is at his most mentally vulnerable?
When his son is weakened from fighting the same monster that has hijacked the father?
When the son is blamed and condemned after being poisoned after only being available to help 
And when the parents are so concerned with money they can’t see how un-funny shit has become
When they have no idea about the impact of their actions…. $

Guess I know why I was woken up 
With a little extra K and W
Had some words that hard to come out
Shit I don’t even know if I’m actually still asleep 
Clearly everyone else still is $

I have moved my heart to a new location 
A place where it cannot be hurt any longer
Because it cannot be found any longer
Except by those who know where to look
But I doubt any will find it. seeing as
I’ve hidden its key- in my book.. 📕 $

I’ve got about 2 hits left 
But idk how many emo lines $

New segment 
“Emo lines”
My life is a joke (youth)
- Shiny studded belt w/ Js
- Zoo York zipper hoodies $

The muse needs just a lil poison to loosen up $$

Would you want to take a pill that
- makes you want to do stuff
- Makes you not want to do stuff
- Makes you forget 
- Makes you remember 
- Makes you happy
- Makes you sad
- Resets everything 
Cuz those are you’re only options really $$

Get your wig split by a few too many shrooms and you’ll be creative too $$$

Didn’t say productive or talented tho $

Fucking love 4:32am
Or PM $$

Even Narcissists do one thing right-
Self belief $$$

Remember what they say about broken clocks… 
And I’ve got 3 of them $

So that’s 6 times a day im right without having to spend any energy $ 

Writing gets funner the more familiar you get with fuckery $

Like I said, my style of poetry is equivalent to intellectual graffiti 
Or emotional 
If you’re a soy boy $

What do you get when a meme lord writes a book?
A Bible $$$

Oh shit
I can’t remember if I took my extended release caffeine pill
Ooh fuck. That’s a dangerous game haha $

Suburban roulette is when 
- you forget what cup of coffee you’re on
- You forget how many xannys Brittany’s taken (wtf lol) $$$

“Fucking hate when I accidentally “select all” and nearly delete my “hard work””
-God sometimes $

Spending a year with yourself is only romantic after 13 with monsters lol $$$

Spending a year with yourself fresh outta high school is the fast track to serial killer $$$

Hot take
Everyone should be forced to write about themselves 
Maybe not actually pen to paper kinda writing. But in a life review exercise kinda way. 
Oh wait…….. 
……..$$$

You’re not a writer unless you’ve gone without 
- food 
- Water
- Weed
- Pee or poop $

Whoever put the smiley on the poop face is my kinda person $$

ADHD is just your brain commenting on everything without your permission $$$

lol new segment of “New segments” $

ADHD be like… $

Writers are sculpted from the same crazy block
Just different sides $$

Thinking if I should risk it all 
*rattling caffeine pills 💊 $

Not worth it
Will use the power of my mind to mend itself
*naps $

This is what happens when you get an assignment 
And you go to procrastinate 
And during procrastination, you find gold
And stop caring bout the OG assignment cuz AdHD and shit
But it’s all good cuz nobody cared about the OG to begin with hahaha $

As an ex pilot, I say that it is a good ability to know when to jump ship $$$

Hate then my notepad jumps to the top without my permission 
Then I have to do the scroll of shame
And realize how much I have to review $

My “editing process” is just going back thru and throwing $$$ on shit
While cleaning up a tiny bit 
Just a bit… $$

New segment 
“Not safe for family”
- I tried to tell you
- Look in the Mirror
- No other way 
- Lead by example
- What you’ve taught me $

Can’t believe my cat has more intuition than my community but hey $

Waking up to the news another childhood friend has died
The saddest part about this one-
My reaction
“Surprised he made it as long as he did”
This friend was a special one
Haven’t seen / heard from him in 14 yrs
Actually owed him $200
We hung out daily when I was 15
He was the primary person I would spend my stolen money with
He was about a month younger than me, Ish, but a couple years older than me streetwise
He introduced me to triple C’s and all kinds of shady substances
He lived about a half mile from me
I was actually on the way to his house when I got the scar of my face
He was one of the most notorious between my friends and family
We were actually were pretty close when we were young
About as close as you can get doing what we were doing 
We smoked so many blunts at the trail 
He was part of the reason why I got kicked out of school 
I would hang out at his house right after I got kicked out 
I was spending most of my time with him and another friend (who died last winter) during my final days of running and gunning
He introduced me to OxyContin 
(Dammit, it took me a minute to connect that dot )
He wasn’t a bad guy, but was essentially temptation wrapped up in a person 
I don’t have any new info on him in nearly 14 years except I think he might’ve gone to prison during that time 
I’m about to do the whole Facebook scroll and learn what I learn $

Remembering the time we went to the mall
I can’t remember what we did at the mall, but I remember we went
I think we saw a movie
Wandered around Bass Pro shops $

Damn, forgot he’d become a father…
This hits for you, brother $

Usually, you don’t start losing shit until the second half of life 
But I start everything early $

Bruh ever had a hair stuck in your throat 
That’s the worst $

Now I’m seeing posts about my other childhood close friends newborn baby 
God this is a strange time $

Bad shit happens when your body does not handle unconscious energy well $$$

Only way to become conscious of the unconscious is to be made aware $$

Can’t be made aware without something moving somewhere somehow $$

I’m worried that the next Jesus was actually Hitler on the last go around $$

I love the H press cuz it gets you good at getting shit off your chest ** $$$

My hair acts so different when it’s wet outside 
It’s a lot more manageable 
Guess that just reinforces that I come from cold wet climates $

I hate to admit, that I’ve always been more productive in the winter because I hate the cold 🥶 $

It’s not scientific unless it can be shared 
It’s not art unless it can’t be shared $$$

Shit gets weird when my night person comes out $$

True evil is knowing the solution and lying to people about it $$$

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-29-25

Some people enjoy being angry so much that they’ll be extra nice just to give people more room to fuck up and disappoint their expectations so they can justify the rush they get from making themselves angry $$$

My last delivery was on 12,000 wild Ginger Lane
So amazing $

You don’t know hell if you have never worked fast food
& Don’t even pretend $$$

Last dash was off Hemingway $

The worst is when the street isn’t finished being paved, and the sewer drains and curb concrete lips are extremely $

Remembering the time I was working overnight at McDonald’s
I brought my homeless sponsee to work with me that night cuz he kept eating all my chips at home
Anywho- he proceed to get drunk in the parking lot while I was on the clock then lie to me about it
I fired him cuz he lied to me not cuz he was drunk lol $

Honestly, it just makes me really sad when people are rude for no reason $$

The good news is that the only explanation for why people are so shitty for no reason is because true freedom, and true free will exist $$$

Nobody is an asshole unless they feel threatened 
So if someone’s being spicy toward you then it’s cuz you scare them $$

Most people will die before they admit their fear $$

New segment 
- Shit you can’t say on the clock 
- Self censorship $$

Nothing scares introverts more than Loud extroverts $$$

I’m actually really glad they didn’t have DoorDash back in the day 
I would’ve never done my time at McDonald’s 
And that experience is one. I am most spiritually, proud of. $

You must enjoy the art to make it
Even if the art is self depreciating emo humor $$

Art always reflects the self $$

God, why do I want everybody else in a moving vehicle to die right now? $

You can rank spiritual experiences by the desirability for repetition $$

Anything spiritual is measured in reps rather than resistance $$$

Maybe I only wake up so my spirit can prove a point and build some shit $

I know I was a builder in the past life and probably a few before then $

Those who have never had ego death really do not realize how stupid most of the shit they do it really is 
Because we all gotta learn that lesson sometime $$

Pain lessons with proactivity $$$

Some roles you have to train for many lifetimes for $$$

Nothing is more productive than those who can create from speech $$

Narrator: “every 10 thousand years the conditions are just right to produce a hero”
*camera zooms in 
👁️. 👁️ 
🔥 💨 
“Wassup” $

Self righteousness is behind the most hideous of crimes
(All of them really) $$

All factors equal
Secure men > insecure men
(Not even same universe) $$

If someone can’t handle hustle & fear for 3 years, they sure as shit can’t handle 30 $$$

Ironic
The pursuit of pleasure often ends in pain 
While the pursuit of pain ends in pleasure $$$

Nobody hates harder than creatives who ain’t creatin $$&

Everywhere,
There are artists actively doing everything they can to avoid making the art they define themselves by $$$

Funny how AI is aiming at the white collar jobs first $$

Something tells me most police academies are not declining many fit, young ambitious men $$

Jokes on the cops
They arrested me when I was 16 for less than a gram of weed for no reason other than to prove a point (literally that’s what the cop said when he was arresting me ) so now they can’t use my fitness or martial arts training or superior hometown hood knowledge on their force $

I didn’t think I was a writer until I started reading a lot and realized how shitty some “writers” were
Kidding aside, it wasn’t until I read something that actually broke through and inspired me
Then most writers suddenly became extremely talented $

If your stomach extends further than your chest, you have good cause for concern $$

If your waist circumference exceeds your chest then you have a problem
Of the most serious kind $$$

Anyone that is down playing the pain of being overweight or weak is in denial of the highest disorder $$$

Happy 12:39 AM $

Man notepad be lit the past couple days 🔥 $

I feel so old every time I have to search for an emoji 
“ Yes Siri please use the fire emoji”
“ and make me sound less like a virgin please” $

The most serious fear is being afraid to shoot your shit $$

Wordplay leads to foreplay 
leads to more play 
leads to more pay 
leads to replay
leads to every day 
Hmm whatcha sayyy 🎶 $

Ever just break out into song and dance? $

“ oh yeah, whenever I drink, I have an allergic reaction
I break out in handcuffs
HAHAHA”
…..
-_- $

“ my head is a bad neighborhood. I shouldn’t go there alone.” $

New segment- 
“Cache of Cliches” $$

lol fuck
*rewinds 10 min cuz i was bsing $

Bbl $

Only criminals care about sounding cool $$

Only evil is concerned with making it sound easy $$

The best things for you are often the hardest and least appealing initially $$

Happy 1:03 am $$

Yea sorry but I’m the kind of guy to open the mysterious bag/ box 📦 
Or press the button 
Or take the pill
Deff take the pill… $

Candy cals are free in the woods or as a gift 💝 
Kinda like drugs haha $

I’m so proud of my tiny little home 
It’s held up thru so much shit
Same to the jeep but she’s a beast so no surprises there $

Art garners attention and sends a message 
Doesn’t really matter how $

Yep- ima lose interest after bout 33 minutes $

I don’t think ima lose interest by 33 years tho
This ride finally just got good $

Ego will have you subconsciously afraid that if you break out of the pattern of everyday BS that you will bring death or some other instantaneous destruction 
When in reality it would rather mortgage your freedom so you die in a safe and equitable prison $$

Happy 1:09 am $

Time for midnight MOB
(What she said)
        (She being the muse)
                  (“Said” being intuitive knowing tickling emotions of restlessness) $

& we all know MOB 😉 $

The ancients are the guardians of great content $$

Fucking love candy $

I’ve “invested” thousands of hours scrolling social media
It’s time to repay $

Nobody can convince you that you are responsible for their behavior unless you let them $$

Do people actually put liquor in coffee ? $

Chuck is a suspicious name
So is Charlie $

Happiness is found after confronting fear $$$

The most “businessy” are the least desirable to be around
All they offer is money $$

I’d rather do door delivery until I die than self censor myself another day $$$

I ate the chip($) on my shoulder a long time ago when I had the munchies $$

Airport’s are a special kind of test $$$

Remembering the long ass layover delay in London $$

Fuck it
Time for 🍳 $

Shit I’m out of paper towels 🧻 $

Bro they’re really getting thorough with these emojis $

Ahh, another day
Another half watched movie 🎥 $

I somehow always end up doing the shittiest shifts
But honestly, I kinda like it
Because at this point, there’s literally nothing I haven’t done $

There is not a single hour of the day that I have not been on the clock at least in some way
What’s funny is I have worked multiple jobs for every single hour of the day at some point $

You can’t tell me I don’t know how to hustle
I’m just dog shit with money cause I just don’t care that much about it $

Very few people are dumb
Most are misguided tho $$
____

Careful when hanging around philosophers 
They will always make it harder than it needs to be out of curiosity $$$

Just gonna ADD my way into fortune, one random line at a time 🔮 $

Set your sights 
Set your direction 
Set your speed
Then Set your seat belt $

Warm ups establish effort required 
The Goal is always to do the bare minimum 
Warm ups are the key to doing the bare minimum $$

Team Truth loses a shit load of battles but ultimately wins the big game $$$

How do you handle betrayal? Resentment and Loss? $

What if you became the best in the world at something and the world doesn’t care? $

Healing is more reconnection than reconstruction $$$
 
Philosophy is just commenting and criticizing shit
Which is why it’s awesome $$$

Comedy is just making philosophy digestible and memorable $$

The most powerful word in the entire world is no $$$

The most impactful, word in the world is yes $$$

The writing muscle is the one responsible for the ego movement $$

Only philosophers would not change anything in their day-to-day lives, even if all the laws in the land were abolished $$$

If somebody accuses you of cheating, 
When you’re not cheating 
Then that is a compliment $$

The best thing you can do to a natural gym rat is accuse him of being on steroids $$

Jim Day is code for some shit. I know it. I just know it. $$

Most things are code for some shit 
It just gets worse if you think about it $$

You don’t need to learn everything just enough to not be afraid all the time $$$

I may be outnumbered 10 to one, but
At least for the final battle Royale, I have home-field advantage $$

$
THOUGHTS I HEARD

$$
SUBURBAN SECRETS

$$$
WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-30-25

Happy Halloween bitches

It is Every hoe’s favorite holiday $$

If you’re lucky, you might see a school teacher dressed up as a slutty traffic cone
I know I already have $$

I love the midnight movies because I can chill while everybody sleeps and not worry about being annoyed $$

But chillin at 6:09 AM while everybody is getting ready and go to work is kind of fun too $

Do you know that fucked up but kind of really good feeling you get when the other person is getting up to go to work right before the sunrise and you’re getting ready to go back to bed for your second sleep $

I think the longest time,
Worrying about the editing Prevented me from even doing the drafting $$

Sometimes The dankest shots of wisdom come when you’re not expecting it $$

Other times they come exactly when you would expect 
Right when you’re in the middle of the shit $$

A brain that short circuits but is super creative 
- spazzes but spits out good ideas $

the root fear of 
the desire for control
Is just being inconvenienced $$$

Divine spirits enjoy solving complicated divinely fucked up problems $$$

Bounding all other senses minus 1/2 is more energy efficient (attention wise)
So TV is actually more draining than reading- listening $$

Money isn’t bad but the way we usually use it is $$

Artist Ingredient list:
- Have mental “disorder”
- Have good taste
- Don’t be lazy
- Care about others $$$

Damn, I gotta be careful not to get carried away $$

I don’t wanna work that hard before the sun does 
But then again, I always prefer to work by the light of the moon $$

I feel like I might be a nocturnal snake in the south 
Like I I don’t like the intense sun(cause ginger) 
But I really don’t like the cold 
And I’ve always been more comfortable in the dark $

So really maybe I should consider flipping my routine
Because everything else in my life gets flipped upside down when I least expected $

Bro, all this really was to set up some kind of big ass spiritual joke cause you know it really is $

Crazy how quickly we forget once a little bit of dopamine or cortisol get involved $$

That’s one of them situations were it kind of rhymes if you’ve bend it a little $

I think I’m gonna get stuck speaking in slang parables 
The same way you can get stuck in a fake accident $

Oh God, it’s happening lol $

Happy 6:16 AM 
*lighter flic $

It took years to enjoy the skill of playing with myself (intellectually)
It took minutes to enjoy… $

Gonna haunt the world with my lines and art one day $$

The positive port about ADHD is it helps you wipe the cognitive slate clean pretty quickly $$

I.e. Emotionally forget shit good and bad $$

On that note 
I actually do believe that this “disorder” has assisted me in my emotional defense 
Meaning because I was never hurt as bad to begin with I did not have as big of a resentment to let go of 
But this is bittersweet 
Part of the reason I was not hurt, is a good lifestyle philosophy 
The other part was that by being emotionally blunted, I did not have enough extra brain chemicals to be hurt $

I’m certain a bunch of motherfuckers reading this. Are gonna be like “bro go to therapy. “
Then go back to drafting an m angry text
Or getting upset about their upcoming shift $

True freedom is not obtainable if you are chained to the bondage of opinion $$$

I.e. if you care what others think you’re a slave to your ego, their ego, and the world’s $$$

“a poem about life” from ya boy 
What a lovely impromptu wake and bake
I mean, literally I got out of bed to take a piss
And on the way, I thought how great of an idea would be to take a hit
And While taking a hit, I thought about how great of an idea it would be to talk a little shit
And while talking a little shit I thought about how great it would be to take another hit
And while… And while… $

Happy 6:26 $

Anyone who doesn’t see the wisdom in “doing the bare minimum” is still learning why “doing the most” is toxic $$

Ugh
Really cringey to think about the times I was emo when I really coulda & shounda been writing/ painting $$

But also really inspiring to think about the times I prayed and got back to work despite wanting to die $$

And it takes a long ass time to discover your craft and even longer to find your style $$

I mean 
There’s a reason why something new has never existed before $

Creating is hard af cuz of the insecure nervous Nancy’s that enjoy complaining about everything $$

I gotta do extra mobility cuz of how bad writing makes your posture 
*sitting sideways $

I need more thumbs
Her: 🥰😩😭🫠 $

Haha I’m swerving (literaryily ) $

Yes- this is what I have been doin my whole life
Getting blazed and talking shit before school 
Then go vibrate in a 30yr old rickety desk after my morning pop tart & Diet Coke until the amphetamines kick in 
Whether at 15 or 30 😂😂😂 $$

Good comedy writes itself $$

Documentaries can be Devine comedy if the person knows how to tell a story $$

Best to shoot first then clean up the mess
*writing Suggestion #3696 $$

Start writing stories and shit and you’ll realize most numbers are made up haha $$

Math really is the sexiest 
Cuz it’s so fucking complicated and yet the most simple thing $$

Someone had to make up numbers to begin with tho… $$

How did I manage to spend so much time alone but yet always around crazy people $

I guess you know what they say 
You feel most alone in a crowd of the wrong people $$

And Just cause you’re alone doesn’t make you lonely $$

Motherfucker, I want some donuts 
Ugh $

Wouldn’t it be funny if I ordered DoorDash? $

Don’t do it Jarrett don’t do it … $

My ego to me always $

My ego did not want me to know that it likes to wear a dress and act like a little bitch when I’m not paying attention $

New segment 
Ego be like $

I like to make things that need to be looked at close up 
I like making things that are easy to judge and push away 
It is an intellectual cloaking defense strategy $$

And my happiness level in a world gone mad is all the proof that I need to illuminate who really has the high ground $$

Any good process is about five steps 
Any longer or shorter matters quite a lot actually $$$

Hmm a literary art museum? $

My style of writing follows my style of lifting $

Mostly individual reps that could be construed together as sets that gradually ebo and flow or 
Are completely interwoven and bounce back-and-forth 
Either way, the intention is to make you mentally stronger $

Getting to know yourself requires you to pass the test of time 
And father time seems undefeated until you discover time travel 
And who actually created father time to begin with
(Because the answer is a doozy) $

I might actually run to the store in a few minutes 
Even saying that out loud hurt lol $

“ can’t you hear what I’m saying”
-Me when I’m writing ✍️ $

I am bipolar with the emojis $

Heinsight - I was born at the perfect time to be a writer
Fuckery was at a height (therefore doom to fall)
Complacency nearly had its hooks in
The Internet was confined to extra bedrooms or cluttered corners in the kitchen
TV and film were in their adolescent phase and being experimental AF
Grew up on MMORPGs, in online chat rooms, and awkward lunch table competitions 
Transcended the physical side effects of sugar and caffeine apparently haha
Smart phones didn’t come out until I was “sober “ (when they crossed the social media line in 2012) $

Writing is the easiest way to alchemize cannabis because it makes anyone funnier. You just have to maintain the flow state which requires practice. $$

Sometimes they say you need to master the mind to master the body, but the inverse is also true. Ask me how I know. $$

I think the truth is that art can be owned 
For better or for worse $$

I only love cats cuz I’m such a dawg $

I probably meow more than my cat 🐈‍⬛ $

The worst thing you can do to someone who’s upset is to be nice $$

If you wanna be a legend, you gotta have to do something. No one’s ever done before. 
Me: i’ll keep a good attitude while working overnight at McDonald’s for three months full-time $

It’s time to eat some sandwiches And swell up like a balloon $

Nothing like a run to the sketchy ass gas station to get a hit of gratitude am I right? $$

Remembering when I got back from that cruise and my friends had become good friends with my drug dealer named bullet 
And while I was on the cruise, my friends partied at the pool behind my house and made a mess and made everybody upset 
So when I got back, I wasn’t too cool with seeing them immediately 
But I still needed some weed 
So when I met up with bullet, he was at this random chick‘s house who is like some kind of school teacher babysitter sorta AnyWho he’s posted up at her house all day, and my friends had been breaking into a lot of cars over the last couple weeks so they cornered me When I met up with him and dumped a bag of stolen GPS and radios and cell phones as a apology along with the gram or two of ganja $

People be like 
“ how can another human even think like that?”
But usually about fucked up angry shit
I hope I can make them say that about having fun $

I am broke again, but at least I have a good bit of carbs $

If you assume someone with differing beliefs is smarter than you than diversity becomes extremely desirable
If you assume everybody else is less intelligent than you will be aversive to diversity $$

Perpetrating a crime may only take a few minutes, but repaying it may take a lifetime $$
 
You can’t get good at editing unless you give yourself a bunch of shit to edit $$

Even though checking the scale is a bad way to see if you actually have gained or lost body fat 
parentheses due to water weight fluctuations parentheses 
But it is a decent enough way to see if you are essentially carb loaded or not $$

Checking the scale is a good way to see how much fuel you having to take 
Not really as good for monitoring fat loss $$$

It’s Halloween so I guarantee everybody in the CIA has the day off… $$

Are people actively in the CIA allowed to say they’re in the CIA 
Or is it just that those who say they in the CIA are the puppet holders? 
And the real CIA is obviously invisible $

Remembering the one time I went to go fill up the tub to let the water cool for the cold plunge the next morning 
But I forgot that I left the water running when I went to go make dinner 
So halfway through the dinner, I remembered that 
And AnyWho, I flooded the whole house $

The game is the most fun in the final two minutes 
Remember that $$

I intend to live my life as one final two minute drill $$

Everything occurs to either wake you up 
Or prepare you for the next sleep $$$

Torture is more difficult to handle than death $$$

All initiations come down to either tap or torture $$$

Goodness is more controllable than greatness $$$

Goodness relies on consistency of input 
Greatness relies on consistency of luck or Chance $$

All the spiritual shit goes out the window whenever my technology doesn’t work as fast as I want to $$

Or if I’m stuck in traffic 
Or if I’m hangry $

Only artists can time travel $$

Flaws are the signature of true freedom $$

You can’t know what you haven’t learned $$

You don’t just automatically know everything without ruining all meaning or fun $$$

Prioritize your training best you can 
Don’t take it for granted when it’s easy or fun $$

Spiritual intuition stems from the spiritual sphere 
The spiritual sphere pulls from past lives and karmic assets 
So I think that there are many souls here on their first go round and don’t have much in the way of higher level, intuitive instincts to pull from $$

Cause my spirit feels ancient as fuck and there’s no way that everybody else feels the same way deep down $$

So there must be layers and levels 
There’s all that is learned in this life, (nature) which is most immediately influenced by the most recent incarnations and (nurture) the selection of every series of events - your luck basically- which is influenced by your karma level $$

There are a couple different types of lives
Learning (prep) - low intensity comfortable. Generic simple, quiet. Follower. 
Building (science)- medium intensity. Medium resistance. Responsible for Functional foundation. Most common.
Burning (perform)- high intensity. Performers.. standouts. High periods Of discomfort and entertainment. Most memorable. Most limited. (Cliche)
Fun (all)- a bit of it all. Most rare.. the quickest to go evil due to its initial comfortable circumstances. $$

New segment
“Mind not muscle” $$

I think people would enjoy exercise more if they’ve viewed it for mental health instead of physical performance $$

The amount of exercise required just to stay out of the hospital is not very much
But the amount of exercise required to look like you exercise a lot is a lot $$$

The down side of DoorDash is now my car smells like fish $$

Most dudes just go faster and call it harder $$$

The truth speaks the same language $$$

This year I’m dressing up as a clown for Halloween $$ 

I’m creating content I’d be proud of rewatching in an interview $$

Stress is the only killer $$$

You cannot be free until you learn how to be $$$

Philosophical reasoning is more of a muscle than anything else $$$

I would say
Symbolically speaking that philosophy is the most important thing $$

The Jesus archetype is the final timeline $$$

The joke on most artist is that they’re nowhere near as special as they think 
They all think their gods $$

Only the profane and uneducated criticize the idea of thinking you are a God $$

If most people understood the meaning of divinity, they would also try to be a God too $$$

“Fuck on off “
-my reaction to the newest JRE $

A master can’t be fooled $$$

I’m fine with assuming I’m the fool 
Instead of assuming I’m a master
Even tho I unconsciously lean on the latter $

Always ask yourself
“What doesn’t this person what me to know” $$

If you were cycling on a highway in 5 o’clock traffic just know that everybody that sees you hates you at least for that moment $$

Not saying that they should, but I’m saying I understand $$

Hustles pay the most when the gen pop is resting $$

“God” is just a construct to filter out the assholes with no imagination $$$

Holding a smile counts as an isometric $$

The McDonald’s near my house is so creative at coming up with new ways to shit the bed $$

We killed it in the dash tonight 
Made $140 within like five hours 
Did it on lesson $10 of gas too 
Stayed within a few miles of the home 
This is a pretty good hustle after all 
Not gonna give away the secret though $

It made me really happy seeing how happy people are to get their food $

There’s a part of me that talks shit about the laziness 
Because of the years I was lazy and all 
But chilling out in the couch with a good TV show after working doing God knows what having some super dank cheeseburgers delivered 
Is what makes his country great $$$

The last order of the night was so cute 
I held the door open for some guy who had his arms full 
When I didn’t have to because it was a little behind, so it was kind of those awkward situation if you know what I mean 
I digress
But he lives there and so he asked me what apartment I was going to, and I told him
And I couldn’t find the apartment on my own, and so he yelled out and helped me find it
And the customer was so cute
She was calling out to me by name and met me outside her door to grab a sundae $

There are so many people who don’t like the way they look
Or the way they feel
And they still manage to do the right thing
And put other people first
Even at their own expense
Those are the real heroes $

Shit, I dropped a cracker $

Got some canned seafood at the Lion today
The pricing seemed a little fishy
But I think it was a good catch $

Eggs & crackers are for elites only $

I got that super dank jam today too
Life’s too short for bad pB&js $

But the joke is that there is no such thing $

PB&Js are the most spiritually balanced sandwich 🥪 
(Another top of the line emoji 
Damn Apple 🍎) $$$

“Yes, I’m going for a full sleeve”
- crackers 
- Tattoos
- Knitting 
- Bjj $

“Can’t stop, won’t stop” 🎶  
was written after these crackers for sure $

My life is such a joke haha $

The training montage I got assigned after my breakup was intellectual $$$

A spiritual test is often disguised as a random insignificant occurrence that which with one wrong move changes everything $$$

I cannot even count how many WTF moments I’ve had $

Ima say it again
If we Make drafts more valuable and take the focus off the finished product
We’ll eliminate most negativity $$

My ego is so annoying 
But it feels so good that it’s not going to stop acting a fool $$

I’ve worried about money for so long that I don’t really worry about money $$

Those with bigger egos are the easiest to fool because they already think they’re right about everything $$$

All you have to do to fool a narcissist is to pretend to be just a little dumber than they are and they’ll never pick up on it because they will be so excited to be talking to someone they view as stupid $$

I’m realizing that I think I get easily overwhelmed by whatever kind of energetic parasites are attached to strangers 
And that the fear that I feel triggers super fucked up thoughts 
Like so bad like evil 
But for a while, I used to think that made me a bad person 
But in reality, we all think fucked up things when we are afraid $$

Thoughts do not actually make you who you are but it’s easy to think that they do cause that is all we can actually do- think $$

Thoughts are just the seed to the action tree so you can grow your consciousness fruit 🍌 $$$

The banana is still a little homo 
And if you think that’s a bad thing, then that means you are homophobic $$

I wish I had a banana right now lol $

Sleeping with socks on inside is a major red Unless the socks are cool as hell $$$

Having a big ego is not a bad thing as long as you are good at admitting when you were wrong $$$

My goal is to be the best at seeing the other side $$$

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THOUGHTS I HEARD

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SUBURBAN SECRETS

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WORDS THAT NEED A HOME

10-31-25